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Lacey, Fabio and Me: The Neverending Story

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        09-23-2013, 05:55 PM
      #621
    Showing
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Wallaby    
    Captain Breakout.
    "But they NEEDED my help clearing these blackberry branches!"




    I hope you guys have all been super well!!!
    I love his new nickname and his "reason" for busting out!

    As for Gman.. I'm thinking that it's a common case of "guys being oblivious" and he didn't realize not showing up without any heads up would be that hurtful.

    I say good on you for telling him, and just let it sink in for awhile. Let him be the one to start the next convo as you are right, space right now is a good thing.
    Wallaby likes this.
         
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        09-24-2013, 12:58 AM
      #622
    Super Moderator
    Christy, me and you. We just have guy issues! Haha
    And Atti most emphatically does not need a Pygmy friend!! Especially a young one, then there'd be TWO goats out there roaming my neighborhood. Hahaha Everything I've ever heard about Pygmy goats says they're basically like fencing in cats=impossible. But I have wondered if getting a third goat would help him. I don't know though. Threes ARE traditionally unstable..at the same time, adding a third goat might make things even more crazy. If I could find the perfect goat: a wether [or a doe, but a wether seems more likely to fit well] that's young enough to play with Atti but old enough to have some sense, no horns, sweet but not overly social, good feet+good feet handling manners, and big - at least 30 inches tall...well, I could go for that. But that's a pretty long list. Haha
    Not to mention the whole "Hazel needs to be kept safe" aspect - this goat would have to be submissive to her, or at least not bully her like Atti does.
    And you know, every animal that I'm "supposed" to have always sort of drops into my lap. Animals that I buy, or actively seek out, never work out like animals that just "happen". If there's a perfect goat out there, he/she will eventually get here and nobody will see it coming. :) Not to mention that I'm a sucker for a hard luck case. If somebody ever offers me a goat in need that fits a lot of my qualifiers...well, it'll be hard to say no. Haha

    Right, Maggie?! So much sass. And that's genuinely why he got out - to go eat those blackberry branches. He had absolutely zero other reasons. Hahaha
    That's really true about Gman, hadn't thought of it like that! Makes me even gladder that I did tell him that I felt hurt! He tries hard not to hurt my feelings but how can he know what will and won't hurt me, if I don't tell him when I have an issue? Can he read my mind? Last time I checked, NO. Haha And it's not great for a friend-lationship to be built on a multitude of past, un-discussed, hurts - that's one way to make sure it doesn't last long! Haha



    In other news, that I forgot to tell you guys about earlier:
    I'm a huge dork but this was kinda a silly "teeheeeheeehee!" thing that happened on Sunday night at church. So I have a couple of lady friends that I sit with [I think I discussed them with you guys before] at church and I happened to mention to one of them, the one I really truly like [I've only known her for a little while but we really "get" each other], about Gman and his unexplained absence. She's met him before when he came up to say hi to me and she was all "he's SO CUTE!" after she met him.
    Anyway, I told her about how he was late to see me and she was all "....are you guys together, like dating?"

    Teeheeheeheeheeheehee!
    And she was totally serious. She had thought we were. HAH!
    *insert all kinds of girly-ness here*
    Obviously that doesn't mean a whollllle lot since she really doesn't know me, but you know...it's nice to hear someone just assume you're dating the hottest+nicest+classiest guy in the worlllllld. Especially since I'm not the prettiest, or the classiest [BY FAR! ], or the nicest.
    I WISH, Church Lady Friend!!!!


    Also, do you guys want to hear a Gentleman Friend story?
    I've had a lonely day, I feel like telling stories. *insert old lady/witch voice here* Storytime with Grandma Wallaby!

    This is basically the story of how we became friends.

    First day of camp.
    I got there early, typical for me.
    I saw my friend B walking across the field with this "hipster" guy and my automatic reaction, since said hipster was so good-looking and so...not someone I would know, my automatic reaction was to think "THAT GUY. Me and him, we are NOT going to be friends. Probably going to be enemies." [sidebar: that's pretty much my initial reaction to everyone, ever, that I'm actually going to be good friends with. Hahaha] I assumed he was not going to like me.

    Then, the initial meeting at camp, the one where the camp director made sure everybody was there and kinda introduced himself/the camp - a friend of mine [my previous crush, yes. Yes. Haha] opened up the camp laptop to get it set up for "Hipster Guy" [soon to be Gman]. And the first thing we both saw, as this laptop opened, was basically a glamor shot of Gman. My friend [who knew Gman already from school] started cracking up so hard and, believe you me, it is HARD to get that friend to laugh. That was my first clue that Gman might not be so bad.

    Anyway, couple hours later, we had meetings with our individual camp areas - I was the Head Wrangler so my area was "Program Staff", Gman was the Photographer so he was also on PS.
    I think this was the first time we really took notice of each other - he was sitting sort of across from me and THE WHOLE meeting I'd look up and see him staring at me, then he'd quickly look away and I'd look away...only to repeat the whole thing moments later.
    That was when I was all "ok, who is this creep? He looks like a jerk but he's staring a hole into my head. THAT kind of guy doesn't do that to girls like me. WHY is this happening." and I decided to become friends, to "make sure he wasn't a creep". Haha :P

    Later that day, the program staff had a little bonfire and we had to pull out all these folding chairs. He made a point of setting my chair up specifically for me and said the first words he said to me: "your chair, my lady". I don't know WHERE that came from but boy. Hahaha
    And he's nevvvver a huge flirt like that! To this day I don't even understand. But that bonfire was basically a repeat of the previous meeting - eyes kept meeting, awkward fast looking away...ahhh, the easy days.

    And luckily, one of my besties was being his photography 'mentor/trainer' since she had done the camp's photography the year before. SO somebody [ME] just, oh I don't know, HAD to sit with the two of them at meals and HAD to invite them on trail rides and HAD to come see them whenever she wasn't busy. I think he went on probably one ride a day for that entire week of training. Hahaha And he loved every second of it.

    By the end of that week, we were being all "dude, did we meet a week ago? Haven't I known you my whole life??" and it was the greatest. And we're still friends.

    I can literally say that he is one of two camp people I'm still close friends with, years after camp.
    I still talk to other people but we're not close and getting closer. And the other camp person was that bestie who did his photo training at camp.


    And that has been story time with Grandma Wallaby!
    I hope you guys liked that story!
    Those events made me feel like a princess and remembering them makes me feel like a princess all over again! Who knew that you could meet someone and one week later feel like you've known them your whole life, and still be close 2.5 years later! Who. Knew.


    And here's a picture of Miss Lacey from this evening. She felt like showing off her yawning abilities.







    Skyseternalangel likes this.
         
        09-24-2013, 01:34 AM
      #623
    Showing
    Make that three of us... ay yi yi...

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Wallaby    
    That's really true about Gman, hadn't thought of it like that! Makes me even gladder that I did tell him that I felt hurt! He tries hard not to hurt my feelings but how can he know what will and won't hurt me, if I don't tell him when I have an issue? Can he read my mind? Last time I checked, NO. Haha And it's not great for a friend-lationship to be built on a multitude of past, un-discussed, hurts - that's one way to make sure it doesn't last long! Haha

    It's so easy to forget that people can't read minds and people interpret things differently!

    I once made the mistake of telling a past boyfriend "Oh you're such a great friend" and he took offense cause apparently friend is a downgrade than boyfriend.

    Umm... sure... cause I'm totally not friends with my boyfriends or being my friend is such a low shelf item *sarcasm*

    Boys can be dumb, lol.

    The other day Lovely Man and I had a bit of a talk via fb of course. Basically he was being Mr. Confusing one too many times so I snapped at him. Apparently he had no idea he was coming across that way. Now he's actually being more clear but still... not sure things will work out due to lack of time. If I had another year, sure. But I got 3 months... so yeah.

    But my point is... communicate! Don't assume, don't forget about lack of mind reading abilities, don't forget some people see things different, and don't forget to give yourself space so you aren't sinking down with the ship, girly.

    You're a strong capable woman. You wrangle goats and horses.. and mischievous cats. Don't let something trivial burst your dam!
    Wallaby and Roperchick like this.
         
        09-25-2013, 01:47 AM
      #624
    Super Moderator
    Indeed! All excellent points!
    Just in comparison for Former Boyfriend story, I know for me, to be referred to as "friend" by someone I like-like is a little...disconcerting? I don't know, to me at least, it feels kind of like "friend" is a limit set on the relationship. Like the person saying "friend" is saying "you're my friend, but nothing more and there's zero chance for more"...you know?
    For me, it's not a matter of the "friend" title being so "lowly" or a "low shelf item" , it's just that it makes me feel like the person calling me friend doesn't like me MORE than a friend...if that makes sense?
    For instance, Gman has been calling me "friend" alllll the time and I have to work SO hard to remind myself that he's not saying "you're in the friend-zone, sucker" every time he calls me "friend".
    I, of course, WANT to be his friend and I LOVE that we're friends...just being called "friend" makes me feel 'friend-zoned'.
    For instance, if Work Creep called me "friend", I would feel really relieved and be all "whew! We're friends, nothing more". But Gman, I WANT to be more than friends, so him calling me "friend" is the opposite of what I want to hear, just because of my own preconception of "friend".
    ...if that makes sense. Haha


    Anyhoo.
    Work went well today!
    Except for Skippy. He was a MONSTER. I do not know WHAT got in to him but he was terrible. I did a whole lot of focusing/calming groundwork with him and he was great...until the kid got on. Then he blew a fuse. With both his kids today. Fine, until they got on.
    Maybe his back is sore...that might be something to mention to my boss.

    In Work Creep news...he tried to pick me up today. >.< I was just like "Um, yeah. You will be singing ALL the high notes if you pick me up right nowt." It was really weird and not ok.
    But he didn't get me and I think I impressed upon him the not-ok-ness of his actions.
    So not ok.
    Otherwise, it was a really good day. I enjoy hanging out with Work Creep when he's not being creepy. He really reminds me of my brother. My brother is a 'creep' with girls too, altogether tooooo touchy for me - though not with me since he knows I don't like being touched.
    That makes me feel safer since WC shares enough of the same-ness with my brother that I can accurately project what to say/how to act to get him to shape up! Haha



    And then, to end, a little quote I saw on my Facebook newsfeed that I really like a lot:

    "Give people what they want, but also give them something they never expected."


    amp23 likes this.
         
        09-25-2013, 05:31 PM
      #625
    Showing
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Wallaby    
    Indeed! All excellent points!
    Just in comparison for Former Boyfriend story, I know for me, to be referred to as "friend" by someone I like-like is a little...disconcerting? I don't know, to me at least, it feels kind of like "friend" is a limit set on the relationship. Like the person saying "friend" is saying "you're my friend, but nothing more and there's zero chance for more"...you know?
    For me, it's not a matter of the "friend" title being so "lowly" or a "low shelf item" , it's just that it makes me feel like the person calling me friend doesn't like me MORE than a friend...if that makes sense?
    For instance, Gman has been calling me "friend" alllll the time and I have to work SO hard to remind myself that he's not saying "you're in the friend-zone, sucker" every time he calls me "friend".
    I, of course, WANT to be his friend and I LOVE that we're friends...just being called "friend" makes me feel 'friend-zoned'.
    For instance, if Work Creep called me "friend", I would feel really relieved and be all "whew! We're friends, nothing more". But Gman, I WANT to be more than friends, so him calling me "friend" is the opposite of what I want to hear, just because of my own preconception of "friend".
    ...if that makes sense. Haha
    Yeah it's intent versus perception. To me a friend will be there for you, care for you, etc. Actions like asking how I'm doing or listening to me vent are friend type qualities, even if the person is/was my significant other (boyfriend, fiance, etc.) they're still being great friends by doing the above things.

    Maybe I should in future just say great person. Make it more generic as to not upset anyone.

    Either or, he knew at the time he was my boyfriend so it was kind of silly for him to ruffle his feathers lol..

    But honestly don't over analyze things like that! If he likes you and wants to be with you, then he wouldn't typically confuse you by making it a point to call you friend. I think just focus on how he treats you :) That's my advice anyway
    Wallaby likes this.
         
        09-25-2013, 06:36 PM
      #626
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Wallaby    
    Indeed! All excellent points!
    Just in comparison for Former Boyfriend story, I know for me, to be referred to as "friend" by someone I like-like is a little...disconcerting? I don't know, to me at least, it feels kind of like "friend" is a limit set on the relationship. Like the person saying "friend" is saying "you're my friend, but nothing more and there's zero chance for more"...you know?
    For me, it's not a matter of the "friend" title being so "lowly" or a "low shelf item" , it's just that it makes me feel like the person calling me friend doesn't like me MORE than a friend...if that makes sense?
    For instance, Gman has been calling me "friend" alllll the time and I have to work SO hard to remind myself that he's not saying "you're in the friend-zone, sucker" every time he calls me "friend".
    I, of course, WANT to be his friend and I LOVE that we're friends...just being called "friend" makes me feel 'friend-zoned'.
    For instance, if Work Creep called me "friend", I would feel really relieved and be all "whew! We're friends, nothing more". But Gman, I WANT to be more than friends, so him calling me "friend" is the opposite of what I want to hear, just because of my own preconception of "friend".
    ...if that makes sense. Haha
    I wouldn't be worried about him calling you friend, he probably does it sub consciously. For me, I've been dating my boyfriend for over two years and he STILL calls me friend on a regular basis, just last night on the phone he said "you're a nice friend", which sounds like he's friend zoning me but we continue to stay in a serious relationship so that=not happening. It used to disconcert me though (and sometimes still does) just because I am his girlfriend so at that higher level but I know, since he's said it so many times and nothing bad has happened, that its just a name he uses for some reason and I don't need to be bothered.

    And he used to call me that when we were "just" friends a lot too (for a year before we started dating), and we still finagled ourselves a relationship, and from what I remember friend was sort of his common go to name. So from my personal experience don't worry about it, although we don't know WHY they use that particular descriptor when they want us to be something more, "Friend" doesn't mean that don't want that.
    Wallaby and Skyseternalangel like this.
         
        09-26-2013, 01:37 AM
      #627
    Super Moderator
    Definitely intent vs perception! You are so right, Maggie! :)
    But yeah, no worries, I'm personally 'over' the whole being called "friend" thing....in a good way. Haha Like it bothers me less now because I've realized that he obviously doesn't mean it in the way I think of "friend" meaning. It just took me a while to realize! Haha

    Thanks Paintsrule! I really appreciate your insight, always. :) That sounds a lot like Gman - under closer observation, it became clear that he always calls me "friend" when my name or a term of endearment would be appropriate. SO I have to assume that being called "friend" isn't bad! Haha



    On the job front, I'm a little POed right now. Trying hard not to be but I'm reminded hardcore why I have a hard time working for someone else.
    Basically my boss just texted me asking me to come in at 2pm, instead of 11am like I was scheduled, because she has a lady coming to "train the horse handlers in how to communicate with the horses" and tomorrow is apparently my day.
    Um, WHAT.
    I'm really having a hard time not taking this personally. The other horse handler IS having a hard time, but that's because she literally got 3 training days before she was expected to do full 6hr shifts on her own. And then there's me. I feel like I'm doing ok.
    The horses are all coming around in their respect for me and, sans kid, they generally behave exactly how horses in their jobs should behave, imo.
    With kids on their backs, it is definitely a bit different but there's daily improvement.

    I don't know, I guess I can just hope that the lady who works with me sees that I am, in fact, a competent horse handler. The girl who trained me thought I was competent...my boss is the only one who doesn't seem to think I can handle it.
    However, not sure I can really blame her since she reallllly brings out the worst in the horses. No offense to her, but it's one of those "mom's here, I can do whatever I want!" situations. Literally, the horses will dive at her in the midst of a session, to have their faces rubbed...and she rubs their faces. Doesn't shove them away because they're working and need to focus, heck no. Rewards the behavior with a face rub. *facedesk*
    And then she's chastised me in the past for jerking the horse away, saying "but he was being a good boy!!" Hah. Um, no. Sessions=work=focus. Post session=love=focus on whatever.
    But she doesn't want to be the issue so she can't see that she IS the issue=Emily must be the issue. :(

    Anyway, think good thoughts for me tomorrow. Hopefully it'll go well. I love this job, the kids, the horses [even when they're bratty...], but that boss of mine. She makes me feel "not good enough" allll the time and I already struggle with being overly critical of myself. Boooo.


    Plus side from today:
    1. I finished shearing Hazel's legs! FINALLY. Haha

    2. I decided to text Gman.
    I hadn't spoken with him since Sunday night [usually we've been talking everyday/almost everyday] and he's.....I guess prone to being unsure about our friendship, but then he doesn't say anything about it. Like he tries to give me space, or something, but then he's silently worrying about if I'm mad or whatever...and he won't say anything, won't break the silence. I know he's had some really bad somethings happen in his life with that sort of thing...but he's never told me about it really, beyond vaguely mentioning it in passing.
    I had hoped he'd send me a text but, going off our past record, whenever he 'hurts' me and knows he's hurt me, he alllways lets me contact him for like a week after. I'm not sure why but I think it has to do with aforementioned past hurts and nervousness about if I'm "mad" or whatever [I've never been mad with him but he's very concerned that I will be....we're two messed up cookies].

    Bottom line, I texted him a 2 line joke which turned into a really nice, long, conversation. The way he responded to the joke [told me a random story from his childhood that had barely anything to do with the joke - kinda 'big' for him since he's pretty private about personal facts], he was definitely waiting for me to text him! Haha

    That boy. A conundrum indeed.


    And speaking of male conundrums. Atticus is a crazy goat.




    I hope you all are doing well!!
    tinyliny and Skyseternalangel like this.
         
        09-26-2013, 01:44 AM
      #628
    Showing
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Wallaby    
    2. I decided to text Gman.
    I hadn't spoken with him since Sunday night [usually we've been talking everyday/almost everyday] and he's.....I guess prone to being unsure about our friendship, but then he doesn't say anything about it. Like he tries to give me space, or something, but then he's silently worrying about if I'm mad or whatever...and he won't say anything, won't break the silence. I know he's had some really bad somethings happen in his life with that sort of thing...but he's never told me about it really, beyond vaguely mentioning it in passing.
    I had hoped he'd send me a text but, going off our past record, whenever he 'hurts' me and knows he's hurt me, he alllways lets me contact him for like a week after. I'm not sure why but I think it has to do with aforementioned past hurts and nervousness about if I'm "mad" or whatever [I've never been mad with him but he's very concerned that I will be....we're two messed up cookies].

    Bottom line, I texted him a 2 line joke which turned into a really nice, long, conversation. The way he responded to the joke [told me a random story from his childhood that had barely anything to do with the joke - kinda 'big' for him since he's pretty private about personal facts], he was definitely waiting for me to text him! Haha

    That boy. A conundrum indeed.
    <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

    That is so cute and thoughtful of him

    Eeee I'd give you a girly hug right now, complete with squeals, if I could!!!
    Wallaby likes this.
         
        09-26-2013, 02:22 AM
      #629
    Super Moderator
    *girly hugging and squealing here*
    Right though? He really...I don't know. I used to worry that my standards were too high, that I was going to have to make concessions in important "needs" of my own to find Mr. Right, but Gman is showing me that, in fact, my standards are for sure high but not impossible to reach. Hard to reach - sure, but not impossible!
    Mr. Right, whoever and wherever he is, IS out there!


    Also, I realized an important fact was missing from my little 'rant' about tomorrow: maybe this trainer lady will actually teach me something. I LOVE learning and if she has a method that actually works, I'm all on board. However, if she's another one of these Parelli-addicted "being the horse's friend is priority numero uno" people... But I would love to learn something new, if something useful is presented!!
    The horses will be my guide. If it works for them, it works for me.

    AND I forgot to throw in a few of the mess of pictures I took this afternoon!
    I've been playing around with black and white again. I think the animals + black and white is just hilarious. B+W just seems to serious to me and the animals are the opposite of serious = makin' me chortle.




    "Really? Are you kidding ME?? You want me to not walk down to the shed for DINNER because you want to take pictures of me? I should think NOT."



    Atti leading the way.



    Hazel's face = priceless.

    "Did he just FART on me??"

    Skyseternalangel likes this.
         
        09-26-2013, 04:13 PM
      #630
    Green Broke
    Excellent last picture and caption, Wallaby!
         

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