Right? Makeup is weird stuff. I used to wear cover-up [I have that kind of skin where under my eyes gets REALLY dark if I don't get 9hrs of sleep] and mascara allllll the time. Now, not so much. Hahaha
I do wear cover up on Sunday though. Gotta look "nice" 'for' Gentleman Friend!! Even though he's seen me at camp where I made no secret of the fact that I generally showered once during the week.....really, who has TIME to shower when you're constantly doing stuff? And I hid it well! Just kept my hair up in a bun and washed my bangs in the sink everyday, not to mention that I usually changed my clothes twice a day - always at least after coming down from the horses! [that was the problem - take a shower in the morning = immediately get horse-dirty, take a shower at night? Who has time? Sleep>shower]
Anyway, this is probably going to be a long installment. I've been having quite the week. Not really terrible, just exhausting.
Lacey is doing great! Her eyes are all back to normal, that ointment seems to have been just the ticket! Thannnnk goodness. I was really worried.
I think that's part of what's making today hard. A woman I admire, who's actually on this forum, just lost a older mare who's really important to her over colic. And another friend, a former member of the HoFo, lost an older gelding [I think he was 24] about 6 months ago to EPM. Both of those horses were SO important to their owners and they had only gotten to have 3-4 years together.
Here I am with Lacey [who is older than both of those horses by at least 4 years], after 5 years together, scared to death over her eyes..only to have her pull through so well over and over.
I'm not complaining, at allllll, but really. What makes me or Lacey so special that we get to recover from the pain, while those sweet women have to learn to live with the holes in their hearts?
I can't imagine life without my dear LaceyLace but why do other have to suffer while we have joy?
I guess that's life though, there's always someone suffering and there's always someone living joy.
In any case, when the vet came out on Monday, she actually said that she felt like Lacey would be an excellent canidate for eye removal if that ever became necessary and that she "didn't see Lacey leaving us anytime soon". She did mention about Lacey's melanomas [due to Lacey's gray-ness, she has more than her fair share of melanomas. Plus side: gray horses with external melanomas typically have fewer on the inside while gray horses without external melanomas are more likely to have deadly ones on the inside. Lacey has a ton on the outside] and cautioned me that with her coloring, we're more likely to lose her to colic or a similar issue than anything else.
I think Miss Lace might have one in her throat somehow since she does choke upon occasion, never badly + have never needed the vet to get it passed, but I think one might be there. In any case, they aren't causing her any trouble now!
But the vet think she could keep going for quite a while more. Hello 40 year old Lacey!! I told Lacey, when I first got her, that I would like to her to live to be in my wedding and live until she teaches my kiddos to ride, or live until she's 40. She can go whenever she wants after we hit either or both of those markers. Obviously, I'd love for her to live forever but you know Heaven might need a Unicorn sometime..........
Other funny story: the other day Lacey and Atti were investigating some bags of alfalfa pellets and Triple Crown 30% that I was bringing down to the shed. Atti must have felt that Lacey overstepped her bounds because he headbutted her IN THE FACE!!! Lacey immediately backed off, too! Like Atti's the most dominant one of crew! WHAT. WHEN did this happen!!!?? Me no likey!
[am I grateful those horns have tennis balls attached to them or am I grateful!!]
In Fabio news, he is doing SOOOOOOO wellllll!!!!!!!!!!! Like SO SO SO well. He is so smart!
He seems to really be enjoying his daily lunging sessions and he's actually starting to lose weight too.
We used him for one girl on Tuesday, two kids on Wednesday, and one id on Thursday - each day better than the last!
I think I told you guys about his "tell" - the head shaking, which progresses to neck shaking, which progresses to a full body shake? So on Tuesday he did his typical head-neck-body shake thing. Then, on Wednesday, he head-neck shook during the ride but waited until after the kids had gone inside to do a full body shake. THEN, on Thursday, he barely neck shook, just a little head shaking, and didn't EVER body shake!!
The other impressive thing is that during the first Wednesday ride and the Thursday ride, he had moments of nervousness where he could have spooked, but he didn't. He kept it under wraps and didn't do hardly any shaking. I'm just all around really proud of the boy. And they had basically written him off as a therapy horse = HAH. He just needed some confidence!
With him though, I keep finding the most interesting mentality. I'm sure this is what's held him back - he was apparently rather neglected when the therapy place bought him and noooooo one seems to be able to let go of that. Every time I talk about him, I get this whole story about how "when he first came in, he really did not look good and he was so frightened of everything. We nevvvver thought he would turn around!" etc etc etc.
Drives me a bit nuts - do horses live in the past? NO. Should we train the horse based on it's past or present? Present!!!! Should we baby the horse because it had a hard past life? HECK NO. And on.
He's no longer bothered by his past and he's certainly not starving so.....
He's really such a great horse. He's really extraordinarily responsive. I just basically have to change how I look at hm to get him to stand still or move off. Don't even really have to move, he's that in tune. I just love it! It makes him so easy to work with. But that also means he needs really careful handling because he is allll over the energy I'm putting out before I even realize what I'm sending. So I can see how he was hard to work with, I don't blame anyone really.
Lacey forced me to figure out how to send out what I want, instead of sending out what I'm feeling, and Mr. Fabs is helping me figure out out to control that! I have probably a 3rd grade level of understanding on the subject of energy projection and Fabs needs like a High School level. I'll get there! Haha
And not in a froofy way like some of those NH trainers say - in a true, primal, soul way. Sharing my soul with the horse and having him/ her share it back. I like to think of it like a convection current - I send what I want to the horse and a sensitive, open, horse will send it back to me to complete the circle.
It takes some horses much longer than others, it seems like trust+respect is the first building block, but my theory is that pretty much every horse will eventually do it and that pretty much every horse wants that connection. I could certainly be wrong but it's worked so far.
Anyway, weird Wallaby-Training confusion of the day. We can call that Game 1: The Convection Game.
In any case, Fabio is doing great and I'm having so much fun with him. He really wants to please and he's super tuned in to me = THE FUNNEST. And have I mentioned that he's a really pretty horse?
I'm hoping to try free-lunging him next week = photo timeeee.
[oh yeah, "Young Buck" kid -good name, RC!!- brought me cookies AND a fruit roll up this week. I had to work with him 2 days last week. I'm super bummed that he's such a kind of creep, he's one of those people that I just get along with super well=bummer, those people are rare and fun. I'm keeping up with the "I am NOT interested" discussion topics and he seems to be getting the picture a little. Still overly "friendly" though. I guess I can be flattered. He offered to move my hay for me this winter and darn it, I had to say no! Stop creeping because I don't want to have to move my own hay, kid!!! ]
And that, I think, is all for now!
And some pictures:
"Hey guys, look at my free-walk! #dressagemaster"
I reallllly like his conformation - uphill build with those "Golden Triangle" booty angles!!
And I found this cute picture of Mr. Atticus and Lacey last winter. Atti was such a baby still!!
I have a feeling Miss Lacey is going to be here for a very very very log time. Especially with all the A+ care and attention you put into her health and well-being (physical and mental lol)
I wouldn't worry too much about the melanoma issue. Yes it is an issue but Im confident that if it does become in issue then you and your vet will be on top if it before it can. My grey arab gelding lived with internal/external melanomas for 17+ years.
The throat one...maybe a little worrisome but if you go to my journal thread and look at the gray TB mare there (gracey) she has a huge melanoma in her throat which her old owner said has been there for over ten years and doesn't hinder her breathing or eating/swallowing minus a little choke on the rare blue moon. But again its just vigilance
Soooo glad Fabs is doing so well with you. And congrats on getting him through his past few experiences with students! That's so awesome. I think that some people (especially rescue volunteers etc who are extra sensitive and emotional?(cant think of a better word)) can just get so wrapped up in how a horse WAS or was treated or how they looked BEFORE rehab that even now when a horse is back to 100% they still have the image of how the horse was before. And they anthropomorphize (sp?) its harder for some (especially non-horsey knowledgable peeps) to remember that horses ARE NOT human. They don't think the way we do. They don't react the way we do. So= Glad you are there to kind of keep it in perspective lol
Haha young buck.
Some kids just really need a more clear/blunt wakeup call that you are NOT interested. I had one friend who was like a puppy to me until I bluntly put it o him that im not rolling with this...then we got back to good friends. Its a science...men.
So....sorry this post was so long but im like super hyper and yeah.
To wrap this all up.....
ITS THE WEEKEND! Go hang with Gentleman friend and your gang of four legged peeps.
OH MY GOSH. GUYS. I went up to feed everybody breakfast this morning and discovered Lacey laying down, taking a little nap. So I went over to her, expecting her to get up, and she didn't!! She let me sit down next to her and pet her for a while. She even rested her head on the ground behind me and sighed. <3 <3 <3 SO CUTE.
I've never gotten to sit next to her and pet her while she's laying down before! She alwayssss gets up/I rarely see her laying down. This makes me so happy!!
Then I got up because the goats were clamoring for breakfast, and Lacey stayed laying down! Then she rolled luxuriously and got up. But she didn't feel like she had to get up because I did! Such a good morning.
Good idea, Megan! I'm thinking that on Tuesday I might try to find a way to tactfully say that his behavior is making me uncomfortable. He claims to be some kind of gentleman and if he truly is, he'll respect that! I'm not holding my breath but you know.
Haha Caroline! Nah, but I do take my phone with me pretty much wherever I go [especially up to the pasture so I don't have to run all the way home if something is wrong] and it has an acceptable camera on it! :) I guess it does kind of look like I constantly have a camera attached to me, doesn't it? Haha
So I saw Mr. GMan tonight. 1. He is SO cute. Really. I like his face.
2. He missed me. And he said that the 2 weeks we hadn't seen each other "felt like forever" - prior to about 2 months ago, we saw each other maaaaybe once every 6 months!! Somebody's getting attached! Somebody's getting attached!!
3. In passing through to another conversation topic, he reminded me of his own "abandonment-anxiety issues" = hate that he has them too, love that we both feel similarly on the subject of getting close to someone and NEVER LETTING THEM LEAVE.
I knew this about him, a long time ago when I told him that he could count on me never stopping being his friend and he reiterated it to me..but that was a long time ago.
4. He wanted to know how things were going with "Young Buck"...ok, name change: "Work Creep"..since I had told him about this kid when he first started being toooooooo friendly.
I told him about Work Creep's latest escapades with the food+offer to move hay and Gentleman Friend's response was "I am going to PUNCH that kid in the face. Tell him that, please." <--Gentleman Friend is about as non-violent as they come. Not to mention that I think I've seen him mad all of once. And he wants to punch Work Creep. Teeheehee!!
5. ^THAT was after I awkwardly told Gentleman Friend about how I had made 'us' into kind of a big deal to Creep, since I could "make it seem real and talk about us a lot."
Mr. GMan's response to what the average guy would probably reasonably be freaked out by? "PLEASE do that! Tell him whatever you want about us! I love it." He didn't even skip a beat after I told him! Haha
6. I told him about how Creep was trying really hard to get me to hug him on his birthday and about how I refuse since "I don't hug just anyone!!"
When GF had to leave [he really 'shirked' on his duties tonight - showed up to talk to me at 5:40, didn't leave until 6:00 when he was suppppposed to have been back downstairs at 5:50! Haha], we stood up to hug, I gave him a hug, and he basically danced away crowing "I got a hug! I'm not just anyone! I got a hug!!!" And then he reminded me to tell Creep about his face-punch threat.
He is TOOOO cute. Oh. My. WORD.
Conclusion: there really is something here....OR we're like way way closer to being BFFFFFFFFFs than I thought.
Truuue story! We can hope. I think, personally of course, that we could have something really good. Maybe not, maybe we're too the same...but maybe our same-ness is perfect. I mean, it makes us perfect friends! Haha And in any case, a wonderful friend is pretty priceless.
Speaking of warm fuzzies, THEY DIDN'T STOP.
I don't know where this kind of kindness came from because usually we're "we know we appreciate each other"-friends and we pretty much never talk about any kind of feelings. Life feelings or otherwise.
However, I sent him a pretty normal text after church [I usually do, as sort of a "I thought of these things during church+would tell you if you were with me" thing. It seems friendly and right.] and he went all thoughtful on me. WHAT IS HAPPENING.
Emily=Queen of Awkward Responses. Smoooooth operator over here.
Also, like that joke? I about died from laughing when I heard it! Hahaha
But SEE??! This guy. [I had to show you the real texts because almost too much to be real! Haha]
Seriously, I don't deserve this level of caring. REALLY. He's the best.
Hkjchsvniureghirnvwibvgw Gentleman-Friend-Palooza! We will return to our regularly scheduled, HORSE-RELATED, programming shortly.