Please, don't beat yourself up over this, it just isn't worth it.
When I brought my mare home, I thought for the first 2 or three months what a mistake I'd made. I came really close to moving her on.
Looking back on it, my relationship with my mare took time to build and now, I wouldn't take anything for her.
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.