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Bonding

This is a discussion on Bonding within the Natural Horsemanship forums, part of the Training Horses category

     
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        01-30-2009, 02:22 PM
      #11
    Weanling
    sorry this is long but its a story that goes so well with this topic:

    When I adopted my horse Bayberry from a rescue I knew he was the perfect horse. Of course at the time I didn’t want a horse. I had just sold my pony who was my EVERYTHING. And I was actually doing a research project in my business class last summer and I found HorseNet Horse Rescue and I was looking around and I saw this horse named CeCe. Cute OTTB, sweet, kind eye on her and I had sent an inquiry about her asking about her, different questions that sort of thing. And of course she had the SAME problems as my pony. So she said for my type of riding, try BayBerry. Nice solid 16.1-16.2 Thoroughbred. And a week later here I am traveling four hours to go see this horse. I was scared. I didn’t know what he was going to be like. Information told and seeing pictures isn’t enough for me. I look for legs, the build. I get picky when it comes to horses.
    so I get to the farm and he was in the pasture so I walked with the rescue owner, Elle, and we were talking and all and I saw him. We made eye contact and he nickered at me and came up to me.
    right then and there I knew he was the one.
    of course he was VERYY herd bound so he didnt like left being alone, but he wasnt bad with me. He was very calm.

    and I saddled him up, no problems. And Elle said he doesn’t listen to anyone in the saddle so be careful, and well what do you know, we walked, trotted and cantered, and jumped 2 feet. And Elle told my dad he's NEVER listened to anyone like he had with me. He's come from a hard life but he was the one..



    it took a lot of trusting and bonding with me and bay. He was scared of people and his own shadow. He came from a barn where he was fed whenever the owner felt like it. Basically starved. I sat with him in the round pen, groomed him, gave him feed in handfuls when he came to me. Everything, and now, he whinnies when he see's me.

    it takes time to find THE horse. You really have to go through the niddy griddy to find the one.
    i felt like I did something good when I adopted. Now im going to start up a foundation the next couple years for the rescued, and abused Thoroughbreds.
    it means so much to me. And bayberry has definitely put an impact on my life and heart.
         
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        01-30-2009, 02:37 PM
      #12
    Started
    Chelsss's story made me think of the story that led me to get my warmblood. He had been through a dressage and eventing trainer (both unsuccessful with him), an equine behaviorist, and was tried in a college riding program. With each situation he got worse (besides the behaviorist). No one could do anything with him, he was too aggressive. I talked in depth to the 2 people who could actually handle him with some success and the way they described him, well, he sounded like everyone's nightmare. But what I heard was that this horse was very misunderstood, had been forced and supressed enough where he fought for his dignity, and at the same time a very smart horse who just needed that someone to help him.

    I am able to do things with him now that no one thought I could do. I'm working on a video to send to the people I got him from to show them what horse they gave up on and said was trash. He was going to be put down if he didn't find a home! How terrible is that?

    Sorry, I got carried away lol. I'm done now. :)
         
        01-30-2009, 02:46 PM
      #13
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Spirithorse    
    chelsss's story made me think of the story that led me to get my warmblood. He had been through a dressage and eventing trainer (both unsuccessful with him), an equine behaviorist, and was tried in a college riding program. With each situation he got worse (besides the behaviorist). No one could do anything with him, he was too aggressive. I talked in depth to the 2 people who could actually handle him with some success and the way they described him, well, he sounded like everyone's nightmare. But what I heard was that this horse was very misunderstood, had been forced and supressed enough where he fought for his dignity, and at the same time a very smart horse who just needed that someone to help him.

    I am able to do things with him now that no one thought I could do. I'm working on a video to send to the people I got him from to show them what horse they gave up on and said was trash. He was going to be put down if he didn't find a home! How terrible is that?

    Sorry, I got carried away lol. I'm done now. :)
    You should share some pictures of your horsey! He sounds like a fine gentleman! :)
         
        01-30-2009, 03:11 PM
      #14
    Foal
    Very touching story chelssss
         
        01-30-2009, 03:34 PM
      #15
    Showing
    Ah, I don't think there's a specific way to tell, really. It's different for everyone. However, we all share the same thought- we just KNOW if a horse is the right one. These stories are so sweet! Hehe, if only our horses could read.

    I am still searching for the 'right' horse. I love Daytona, she's not exactly mine...although it feels like she is because I am the one who really bonds with her, & I am working with her a lot. I've fixed her 'banana-like' jumping, & I've calmed her down. I love her a lot. But still, I'm not sure if she's the 'right' horse. Such sweet stories, though!
         
        01-30-2009, 04:12 PM
      #16
    Foal
    Thank you guys!
    The horse im going to look at is a AQH, very gentle, and was ridden by a mother and daughter.

    The only thing about looking for horses, is where I live. No one is really selling. Except maybe a one or two and they are about 5 yrs old, for 200 dollars. I'm looking for something about 10 yrs.

    LOVED the stories! I hope that's how it happens with the horse im going to look at.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by free_sprtd    
    Have you shopped around at all? Browsed other horses ads and stuff? For me it was just a gut feeling. I can't explain it. However, there are much smarter ways to go about picking a horse, but I just knew.
    Nope, my parents just told me I could start looking for one. So I contacted a "Horsey" friend and she told me her dad was selling his.


    I'm just really hoping he is the one. So I can stop looking. For some reason I just don't trust the people that are selling for that low, makes me think something is wrong with the horse.
         
        01-31-2009, 08:50 AM
      #17
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by nolahcontend    
    Thank you guys!
    The horse im going to look at is a AQH, very gentle, and was ridden by a mother and daughter.

    The only thing about looking for horses, is where I live. No one is really selling. Except maybe a one or two and they are about 5 yrs old, for 200 dollars. I'm looking for something about 10 yrs.

    LOVED the stories! I hope that's how it happens with the horse im going to look at.



    Nope, my parents just told me I could start looking for one. So I contacted a "Horsey" friend and she told me her dad was selling his.


    I'm just really hoping he is the one. So I can stop looking. For some reason I just don't trust the people that are selling for that low, makes me think something is wrong with the horse.

    I mean, it wont HURT looking at the horse. It never hurts to get used to looking at horses. It takes alot of expirience to find a good horse. But don't saddle him up, or even get on him until you somewhat bond with him. If they have stalls. Put him in a stall and give him some feed.
    Groom him. Give him treats. TALK to him.
    The first time I saw bay. I put him in a stall. And the rescue owner Elle said he doesnt like being in stalls for too long so I wouldnt advise going in there with him. I said I was fine, and so he circled around a few times and I had treats in my pocket. He calmed down as soon as I started talking to him. I had a conversation with him. Just as if he was talking back.
    I wasnt going to get on him til he proved that he trusted me in some sort way.

    That, to me is a great way to bond. Now, I sing to him. He loves country :) he loves this song called put a girl in it, by brooks and dunn.
    I sing that to him everyday and I play music to him. And he loves it. He calms down if he's having a bad day, or just if he's grumpy.


    When you go to try this horse out. Don't rush into it. Really take your time and "research" what makes the horse happy. And if you want, get on him. Walk around and still talk to him. Just really talk. Say "how have you been", "i'm excited, how about you?" even try singing to him.

    I hope all this helped!
         
        01-31-2009, 05:27 PM
      #18
    Weanling
    Chelssss, good advice there!

    As far as my story goes...I had 2 geldings that I was fine with. I was talking to (at the time) a friend of mine about needing to get a different saddle, but not sure what I needed. She suggested coming out to her house & trying several ones out that she had for sale. She also mentioned she had a mare there that she was selling. I was NOT looking for a horse. I was looking forward to trying out saddles & a free day of riding with out tacking up & down! Lol I rode her for a while, and while I was impressed with her, I was STILL telling myself no no no. All of a sudden, a little voice inside me went: "Not looking for a horse, not looking for a horse....this is your girl. THIS is your horse" We went home & got the trailer & took her home. (Ended up getting the saddle a few weeks later!)

    To me, it's kinda like getting a boyfriend/husband et al. Different people look for different things. You will know when you see that horse. Don't just settle on the 1st horse you meet. Shop around & when you find the right one, then you will know. Good luck!
         
        01-31-2009, 07:42 PM
      #19
    Started
    It really sounds like you have your hopes up about the horse you are going to see. I hope it does turn out to be the right one, but if it doesnt, try not to be to disappointed. My sister just went on the whole horse shopping thing and I went along for the ride. She had to look at many horses before she found the right one. Sometimes the horses werent what the owners said they were and at other times it just wasnt the right fit. The point is....dont worry, you will find the right horse. Don't settle for less!!!!!! I would advise you to go to your appointment a few minutes early (like maybe 30), that way they don't have time to ride it out before you get there (we ran into some of that). Also, If it looks as if it has been rode or is already saddled that's a red flag too. Oh yeah...and make the owner ride first!!! Just some little things we learned along the way. Gl to ya!!!
         
        02-01-2009, 01:24 AM
      #20
    Foal
    We unfortunately will not get to see the horse til next week.

    What are some questions I should ask? What do I need to look for?
         

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