It's already been mentioned here, but I'll add that True Horsemanship Through Feel is my horsey Bible.
It's not so much that Bill gives you a step-by-step program, although he does describe a lot of steps/skills, but most of all, he reminds you to approach your horse with "feel", which is all that your horse has to go on. People get into trouble when they try to interact with horses without "feel".
I think it is so great that many people on this forum do not want to have power trip relationships with their horses. Being a good leader does not involve dictatorship - who wants that. I've not read Mark Rashid but I like how he is detailing the leadership role - very cool. I've thought it should be 51/49 ratio but I also know that I actually like to know what my horse is thinking about which comes in really handy when you're out trail riding. Horses sense all sorts of things way before we do - I mean how great is that! I've read quite a few books over the years but for a step by step how to guide I really find the DVDs to be better.
Buy the old parelli book from 1993! "Natural horse man ship"
It has all the exercises in one place, with pictures. Its great and I think that's partly because it was before the commercialization! I found it very very helpful.
Actually Books and Videos are only going to get you so far, another pair of eye sis really necessary to progress. If you cannot find a instructor close get a fellow NH fan to watch you and critique you as yo learn the program. As Dennis REis says buy all the programs (Craig Cameron Clinton Anderson Lyons and Parelli) and it will still be cheaper than an week in ICU.
This is your life we are talking about, And it, is so hard to relearn it the right way after you have learned it wrong .
I used to not like Lyons because he broke things down "too much" but now I see Dennis doing the same thing and I appreciate it so much because the little things mean so much!
I love Monty Roberts! He is my hero! I also just bought one of his books last week! I also bought two of Clinton Andersons books. One more book that I bought is about getting your horse in shape and has LOTS of really cool and interesting exercises to do with your horse!!
I'll try to post again what it is called but right now I have to do earth hour!! We are shutting down our power for one hour!