Caught in the Middle

I am starting to train my new horse using Parelli methods. Training I think is going great...we are still building our relationship, respect, love etc.. Although now when I go to get her she will pin her ears at me , I admit I have been bad going to get her take her out of the pin to the yard w/o love first. Although I do give her a few minutes to eat grass (what little she can find in the winter) before we ride or start working. Im going to start just spending some time with her instead of working her every time she sees me, and giving her a good rub down before I halter her. And of course encouraging with treats that im not going to "get her". I know its early but I can't wait until she comes running to me! When she sees me. And doesnt jog away when she is in the grassy pasture or yard. I can't be their every day. I also throw the halter over my shoulder to hide it. Advice?

Also how should I equal out the "love" time verses training time? She is only 4.5years and I know she is still learning, but I really want us both to be ready by this summer. Kinda embarrassing when your riding in public and she just keeps turning around and refuses to enter the trail.

I am not into Parelli.. but I am into horses. And I know if they pin their ears and you do nothing.. it's going to get worse. It could be a pain issue, or a behavioral issue. But it needs to be fixed, NOW.

First, this should be in the NH area. You may well get lambasted here.

Anyway-where did you get this idea of "love time"? Seriously? Maybe I have missed that PP lesson. I am not an "indepth PP person", but have spent 6 mo at a PP barn-never heard that one, and frankly-that just feed the whole foo foo training person, but THIS? THis really sound WAY too much like butterflies and rainbows to me.

Here is how I think about it. (as do my NH-including my past Parelli tranier) put it. My horse, and I am guessing your as well, has 23 hours a day to do what they want. I am asking for about ONE HOUR. That is NOT too much to ask, whether they like it or not.

Here is a serious piece of advice. Your whole attitude of all of this "ooo-I can't do _____ she might not like that" and *GasP* NO I can NEVER hit her-that is HORRID". WILL eventually get you hurt. It may not be with this horse or even the next. But I will guarantee one will come along that will take your "butterflies" chew them up, spit them out at you and turn around and kick you as he leaves. In other words-you WILL get hurt unless you gain their respect. WIth respect comes love and trust.

Agree with both the above posters ^^^
Check for pain first then go for the behavior she pins her ears force her away and make her work... if its behavioral she is trying to dominant you. But if you have been working everyday with her she might be sore if she wasnt in great shape.

I agree. I don't think its pain, I think its that she thinks every time I go to her I am going to halter her up and ride/train her. And she is a "fatty" and loves her grass and doesnt like to be taken away from it. A while back she pinned her ears and turned her butt to me. I took her immediately tied her up so she couldnt eat and made her work. When she did it yesterday I told her to quit it and stuck with her hopfully showing her that just because you do that doesnt mean im going to give up. After awhile of being in the pasture just rubbing on her and letting her walk away and coming up to her again it seemed to improve. How would you fix the problem? She doesnt fully respect me yet(obviously)...still working on the training with that.. My friend said her horse did that to her when she started out, and after working with him and "loving" him before she haltered him, he learned it was ok.

Mine, who happens to be a PP LBI, pinned his ears LOTS. Just because the LBI's have that whole "make me" attitude. Honestly-he is now with a more" traditional trainer who doesn;t give a rats behind what his "feelings" are-and his ears are never pinned. He just needed a clear and distinct leader.

I think the Parelli words are Love, Language and Leadership in equal doses.
But I have to agree that in this case, the pinning of the ears will not go away by wishing it away or loving on the horse more. Highly unlikely.
OP, consider that maybe the balance is actually too heavy on the love and needing more on the leadership.

In any case, I will move this thread to Nat. Horsemanship, ok?

I agree tiny. I moved the thread btw.

Responses like mine are the reason why you should have put this in the NH section of the board.

Take a deep breathe - if my horse pins its ears at me, he gets a good solid whack! He just gave me the horse equivalent of the middle figure, and that doesn't fly with me.