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Gaining a horses trust?

4K views 21 replies 16 participants last post by  Saddlebag 
#1 ·
I recently got a rescue horse and I know nothing about what has been done to her and there is no way to find out. The only thing I do know is she was not fed.What I need to know is how to gain her trust in me? She does know me when I go to the barn now and even gives me a nicker. I spend time there just working around the barn letting her here my voice but I know she still doesn't trust me 100%. I would like to start working with her because she doesn't want her sides touched so therefore grooming properly is out. Do you think I could start desensitizing her to be touched or will I lose the little bit of trust she has in me. I have had her 2 weeks now. Also when I go to get her in the evening to put her in back in her stall she comes right to me now and even goes right in herself.
 
#2 ·
I wouldn't "desensitize" her. I would contiue to let the relationship build like your doing. Everyday try something new and be very gentle but clear about what you ask. Never hit her, never give her a reason to not trust you. Watch her ears and body language. She will give you green yellow red lights. Does that make sense?
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#3 ·
I do understand what you are saying. I guess if I cant get her groomed all pretty it isn't going to hurt her and also I would never hit her! I have gotten a pretty stern voice with her though when she tried to bite me. I guess I will give her some more time before I start working on touching her sides.
 
#5 ·
You have to move past the "doesn't want to...." stage. Just brush until she calms down, then quit. If she kicks at you, make a loud noise, like HEY or ACK, and go right back to what you are doing. Be sure if she is kicking to stay forward enough that she doesn't hit you.

I would not tie her up to do this, I would hold the lead rope in one hand so I could move her rear away if she tries something. Teaching her to ground tie seems make horses a lot easier to work with, at least for me.

Nancy
 
#6 ·
If she's unaccustomed to being groomed switch to a soft brush. She may be quite sensitive to a curry or stiff brush. An old shoe brush is nice and soft. Don't tie her but hold the lead so she doesn't feel claustrophobic. Brush her where she has lots of room to move around. Since you have the lead in your left hand, about 3' from her clip, all she can do is circle you. Move so you are behind her shoulder and follow her movement. She's walking half sideways and you're walking fairly straight so she'll give out before you do. When she stops, don't pet her or talk to her but just start brushing again. If you are consistent with this she'll figure out it's easily to tolerate the bushing. If you have time, do this three or four times a day. It doesn't have to be a thorough grooming, you're just getting her used to having the brush on her body. When she does stand quietly, when your are finished, offer her a treat. Not always, just for special times.
 
#7 ·
Are you familiar with pressure-release techniques as they apply to horses?
Your horse doesn't like being groomed, this is either due to fear or lack of training, neither of which change how you should approach the horse with pressure-release training.

If you have a round pen, small paddock, or large stall you can start training. since the horse is afraid of being groomed she probably won't let you stand at her sides either. So, approach her sides. Walk slowly and don't look the horse in the eye as you approach, look at her shoulder. If she stands still while you walk up to her, then pet her shoulder slowly start petting down her back, under her belly, and all over. If the horse tries to walk away from you, line your shoulder up with hers and match her steps. if she takes two steps to the right, you follow her step by step and stop the second she stops moving. Count to ten and take a step forward. repeat until either you are at her side and petting her, or you are following her step for step again.

In the horses mind you are applying pressure to her by coming towards her. By following her step for step you are not letting her get away with relieving herself of the pressure of your presence. by stopping when she stops and following her movements you are showing her that you respect her, but also that you won't take walking away as an answer. Ideally she will learn that walking away from you only makes you keep coming, and that stopping and standing still is ideal because you are no longer pushing her away.

As soon as you can approach her side and rub it all over, you can start approaching her with a brush and gently using that to rub her.

Be sure to do this in a small space or even with just holding the end of the lead rope. Trying this in a large pasture isn't going to work.
 
#16 ·
I'm no expert, but from what I'v heard the best reward you can give a horse is resting. So I want to add a few things. When you're putting pressure on your horse she doesn't like it, so when you stop putting pressure on her you're rewarding her with some rest. Basically rest works the same as a treat, it makes the horse understand that she did something good. That's all.
Good luck!! :)
 
#8 ·
You're in the EXACT situation I was in when my rescue, and now my pride and joy, Romeo came in.
We knew nothing about him other than that he was basically left out in a field to starve for 8 years and he was generally terrified of anything that moved or made noise.

I found that letting him explore the things he was nervous about with me there helped him a lot.

But just start slow - just talking calmly will get her acclimated to you.

Give her a bit of food and work on just being able to pet her all over. This may not be something that only takes a day - it took me a week with my rescue. Then you can try to put the brushes in a bucket or basket on the ground and let her sniff around in them and let her smell them before you brush her with them. She'll realize that it's not scary and it won't hurt her if you let her see it and it explore it first.
Start at her neck and rub with your hand before you stroke with the brush. She'll eventually understand that brushing is just like petting but not with your hand. Just be slow and take everything one step at a time.

Once she's more comfortable with you, I suggest you try join-up if you have access to a small arena or round pen and know how to do it SAFELY and CORRECTLY.
I found that it worked wonders in building trust and reading each other's body language. My horse has come to look forward to working in the round pen because of it and he's much more responsive to what I ask of him on the ground.

Overall just take it slow and really focus on her body language. If you notice she's curious about something (a bucket, a halter hanging in the isle, a wheel barrow, etc.), let her investigate it and reassure her as she does it. She'll learn that if you let her touch it and you're not scared of it, then she shouldn't be either.

Good luck! It took me a long time to be able to do what I do with my rescue but it was COMPLETELY worth it!
 
#9 ·
Desensitizing builds trust and sensitizing builds respect. Both need to be done in order to end up with a good horse.

Put her in a small area ( not stall small), with a halter on and use some sort of training stick or whip to just start touching her. Start and her withers and topline, then her butt, her sides, then her legs, up her neck and finally head. If she moves away, just bump her nos back toward you and keep rubbing, if she kicks at it, keep rubbing. By using a tool you are keeping yourself out of harms way if she does kick and you'll be able to keep touching her if she tries moving away. Keep rubbing until she stops. Once you can rub her without her moving you want to then get her to relax. Rub until she gives you a sign, lowering her head, resting a hind leg, droopy blinky eyes, a big sigh, or a relaxed mouth or licking her lips. Between the moving and relaxing stage you may find she stands still but flinches. Once she understands to stand still you do not want to stop rubbing while she is flinching, keep rubbing till she stops.

When she is good with that, then you can use your hand or a brush.
 
#10 ·
You may want to investigate some more into why her sides are so sensitive. Dr. DePaolo put out a great short video on equine ulcers. He uses 3 different horses so you can see the reactions of a negative ulcer horse and 2 that have varying degrees of ulcers. Not saying this is what your horse has, but the test is so simple, it may point you in the right direction. He starts speaking at 0:36
 
#11 ·
I've been dealing with a rescue horse, too. I had been trying the standard natural horsemanship methods, such as Parelli, to try and get him gentled. He didn't want to be brushed either. But he wasn't scared. Actually, he became rather aggressive and dominate once he settled in. I've been looking into Carolyn Resnick's Methods recently and she does everything at liberty in the beginning, unlike Parelli. I've done the water hole ritual of "sharing territory" and he responded like never before.

For grooming, I was following the advance/retreat and he was not getting much better. I then followed Resnick's suggestion of: if you approach a horse, you respect his space and follow his lead; if the horse approaches you, he respects your space and follows your lead. When I want to groom him or when I go into his space, I wait for him to look at me, take a step back, then go on in. Wait for a "yes' on the grooming, retreating when he says "no", then retry. All done at "liberty" meaning no halter/rope and he is free to go at any time. He responded the best with this approach. I can now groom him, pick his feet, give meds, etc. without resistance and at liberty.

She also says it's best for you to wait for the horse to come to you for haltering as this means you are the lead and he is following you. If you do go into his space, you must show respect for his space, he will respect you for it. She has a blog and YouTube channel. I've just ordered her book Naked Liberty and her DVD, hoping that I can understand the waterhole rituals before I try any more of them.

I also found a blog that gives some detail on the rituals. The "sharing territory" is the first one and that's the one I've done with great results. Also, I basically used the "taking territory" for his food aggression and it's working. When I first got him, he gradually became more and more aggressive at feed time to the point where he bit me. I keep him from the food(in a non-aggressive, non-punitive way, just wave him back) until he looks at me with both eyes and forward ears - a good expression. He still wants to be demanding, but backs away easily and it takes less and less time for him to look pleasant.

I'm very impressed with this approach. I think it would be especially good for fearful horses as there is no pressure or punishment, it shows the horse you respect his space yet expects respect from him. It establishes you as the leader.

Good luck!
 
#13 ·
I think everyone gave really great input! Honestly, just let it take the time the horse needs. They're all different and each experience is different, some come around faster than others and some take a long time. I think it sounds like you're doing an excellent job with her. Just keep up the good work and relish each moment of recovery and healing you are guiding her through. We all love and appreciate anyone who has the heart and willingness to save and restore a horse back to the life they deserve!

Oh, and we'd also all like to drag the abusers out into the streets and beat the holy crap out of them! !@$#$&!
 
#14 ·
Sunda, I too followed CR and the WR and it was the huge breakthrough I'd was looking for. A Parelli devotee was pleased about "graduating" to working the horse at liberty. I told him I must have done something wrong, as I started at liberty and advanced to on line work. My horse is so light that when leading him I have to look to see if he's still with me. To ask him to move off I shoo him like shooing chickens, no stick or rope, just my hands wiggling. Never any resentment. With Parelli's method the horse was compliant. With WR, the horse became trusting.
 
#15 ·
Sunda, I too followed CR and the WR and it was the huge breakthrough I'd was looking for. A Parelli devotee was pleased about "graduating" to working the horse at liberty. I told him I must have done something wrong, as I started at liberty and advanced to on line work. My horse is so light that when leading him I have to look to see if he's still with me. To ask him to move off I shoo him like shooing chickens, no stick or rope, just my hands wiggling. Never any resentment. With Parelli's method the horse was compliant. With WR, the horse became trusting.
That's what I'm getting. So light, like pushing a little boat over water. It's makes sense: you don't ask a horse to work until you've established yourself as a leader and you do that on the ground at liberty. Klaus Hempfling is similar in that he gets the horse's love first before he puts on the halter, then his lead line always has slack. Otherwise, you pull the horse onto it's front end and off it's haunches. That wiggling the rope to back up makes the horse throw it's nose up. I'm thinking the horses do what you want to avoid the aggravation, I rather they do it because they're in tune with you.

I ordered Resnick's book and dvd before I do anymore rituals to make sure I know how to respond correctly, since my horse is kinda pushy, so I can shape his behavior without getting myself hurt or being too punitive. I just hope it explains the rituals in a little detail without having to sign up for the online courses. Sometimes these dvd's are only an exposition of results rather than a how-to.
 
#17 ·
Almost 1 year ago, we got 3 rescued mares. They were underweight and there was no info on them. These 3 were out of about 150 that were rescued. Some were believed to be pregnant. Some may have been trained and registered. No one knew for sure.

We let them be besides feeding them. After they put some decent weight on, I started to work with the one that was mine.

She was hard to catch, didn't like to be touched, let alone be approached. I spent months just trying be near her. Nothing worked well except feed. Even with feed, she was jumpy and skittish. She seemed to be fearful and I was about to give up on her.

I decided that I had to send her down the road but hopefully to a good home. To do that, I would have to put some training into her.

Doing that training was the key I was searching for. I had tried spending time with her, trying to just be nice to her and got nowhere. I put time into getting her to be catchable and learning groundwork. Then I was able to put a few rides on her but then winter hit.

Now she let's me approach and catch her. She'll even come to me. I can brush her all over. She didn't like her sides or belly rubbed either.

The reason I failed at first? Something I've said to others. Treat a horse like a rescue and they will act like a rescue. Treat a rescue like a normal horse and they will become a normal horse.
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#18 ·
I've met a number of horses who didn't trust people enough to be touched. They'll let you touch their head before they'll let you touch anywhere else.
What I do is I start with touching them where they'll let me, and slowly but surely I'll run my hand further and further down the side of their neck and their back just to the point of where they're uncomfortable, then I'll bring my hand back to where they are comfortable and run my hand back down to where they're not so comfortable. Keep doing this and the area that they're comfortable for you to touch will as big as you want it to be. It may take only 5 minutes, but it may also take a few days depending on the horse :)
 
#19 ·
Since horses are prey animals it is instinctive to not allow an animal (human) to touch it until it realizes your intention isn't to eat it. If a horse doesn't wish to be touched in a particular spot, I'll allow it to move on the lead but my hand will remain on it's body. It will circle me but it's easier for me to walk in small circles than the horse to move laterally. When it stops, my hand is removed. I will repeat as many times as it takes until the horse realizes my intention isn't to rip it open. We are initially seen as predators and the horse may think the hand is a claw that can do serious damage.
 
#20 ·
Sunda, google Erins Carolyn Resnicks Notes. These are her observations and she has written them in sequence. Most helpful. I worked my way thro the first three then back and forth. My paddock is in the pasture and both gates were open so the horse could leave at any time. One day he departed because I'd introduced a new obstacle that was too much for him. He stopped just past the gate, looked at me then came back. Blew the socks off me. He then took on the new challenge with all his heart.
 
#22 ·
Sundra, did you CR material arrive yet? I used her method for teaching the spooky boy (no longer spooky) to stand until I tell him otherwise. This was at liberty, in the pasture and he could have walked off at any time. This lesson took about 10 min. It graduated to where I could walk a huge circle around him and he was rock solid. I now have a signal whereby he knows it's okay to leave.
 
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