A true connection begins to form when you allow the horse to not want to be with you. This is a difficult concept to grasp but it actually strengthens the bond. A horse is a fight or flight animal. People are inclined to insist on a horse doing something, that he'll get over it. When a horse is afraid he's not thinking so after he's gone what he feels is a safe distance, if left alone for a few minutes, he'll come to realize it wasn't so bad. You now have to figure how how to draw him back. Don't expect it the first time or two but when it happens that is when the magic begins. You will begin to find that what you initially asked of him that triggered his flight response, he may do now with brilliance and oftentimes it doesn't have to be repeated because he wasn't under any duress. This is the beginning of real communication with the horse. And once in a while, just take a chair and reading material and join him in a paddock or pasture. Because you are reading and not thinking about him, most horses become suddenly fascinated and want to hang around. Providing a flake of hay nearby is fine. He may even chose to sniff you out to learn about you.