I don't feel a bond with my horse - Page 5 - The Horse Forum
 77Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #41 of 42 Old 12-05-2013, 10:15 PM
Yearling
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: In Sunny, HOT and HUMID S.C.
Posts: 1,427
• Horses: 2
Quote:
Originally Posted by tzoidbk View Post
I feel like my horse hates me. I don't really know why I feel this way but I do. I feel like he doesn't really want to be around me. It's driving me crazy. I just want to be able to have my horse love and care for me as much as I do for him.
Bonding tips?

I feel unloved and everyone on Instagram is posting liberty pics with perfect bonds. And Im just like... "Eh, my horse would never do that"
ok, I'm going to be lazy and not read all the other post so I'm sure I'm probably going to repeat some things. Sorry about that.

Your horse is never going to "love" you. If I sit in the pasture my younger mare will come to me within minutes and the older one might look at me, but will have not interest in coming over unless she thinks there is something in it for her (i.e. A treat). So if I'm working with the younger one and she earn a treat the older one may come over and want me to work with her (she'll even start doing things on her own in hopes ). Neither of them "love" me, but the younger one sees me as the leader and likes being scratched so coming to me is a natural response to that. The older one accepts me as her leader, but would prefer to be .

You can train a horse to come to you when ever you are around it, but that's it doing what it was trained, not showing you love.

Love is a human emotion. Dogs, horses and other pets/livestock don't love. People attribute human emotions to them, but those emotions don't really exist. They react to us in ways that fit into the way nature made them. In some cases we use that, and in other cases we train to over come that, but in both cases we seek to (and hopefully succeed) fit them into our world and have them react to us in a way that we want. When they do that (for whatever the "actual" reason) people put a human trait to it, but it's not.

If you really need the horse to come up to you so you feel "loved" you can spend a few days, weeks or even months working on that. You can train and condition your horse to come to you. Teach him to come to a whistle and you can teach him to be waiting for you from hearing the whistle. But just remember that's not love. They don't have that concept. Even in cases were a horse as reacted to defend someone it's not done out of love. Horses will fight and defend naturally and if you hold the right position with them they'll feel the need to defend you. A feral horse will defend, but not our of love. It's just one of many things that has enabled them to survive without human protection (even we've been eating since before recorded time )

The loving horse that does everything for it's owner is a product of books and the entertainment industry. It sells well and comes off well (mostly with people who have dealt much with horses ), but it's still fiction.

They're always going to be bigger and stronger so you better always be smarter. (One of my grandfather's many pearls of wisdom)
its lbs not miles is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #42 of 42 Old 12-05-2013, 10:44 PM
Trained
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 5,188
• Horses: 2
I'm on the fence about how much a horse can "love" a person. But I certainly think they can be very fond of a person and have a strong bond with them. And I do believe they "love" each other.

My mare loves her 3 yr old son. She nickers when I bring him back from a ride and they mutually groom all the time. If he left permanently I think she would miss him and maybe even mourn for him. Is that love? I guess it depends on someone's definition of love. I think she loves him with a mother's love.

I think it's arrogant of the human race to think we are the only ones with emotions. Animals show emotion all the time. At least mine do.
trailhorserider is offline  
Reply

Tags
bonding , help training , liberty training

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the The Horse Forum forums, you must first register.

Already have a Horse Forum account?
Members are allowed only one account per person at the Horse Forum, so if you've made an account here in the past you'll need to continue using that account. Please do not create a new account or you may lose access to the Horse Forum. If you need help recovering your existing account, please Contact Us. We'll be glad to help!

New to the Horse Forum?
Please choose a username you will be satisfied with using for the duration of your membership at the Horse Forum. We do not change members' usernames upon request because that would make it difficult for everyone to keep track of who is who on the forum. For that reason, please do not incorporate your horse's name into your username so that you are not stuck with a username related to a horse you may no longer have some day, or use any other username you may no longer identify with or care for in the future.



User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Don't feel bad if you don't have an indoor... MyBoyPuck Horse Riding 20 02-18-2013 08:53 PM
I have no bond with my horse, I feel like I failed CountryChic12 Horse Talk 28 12-06-2012 02:50 PM
I feel like I don't know anything. shaggy Horse Talk 10 08-19-2012 11:49 PM
I feel done...I just don't want to be AllThePrettyHorses Horse Talk 21 08-17-2011 07:12 PM
I feel like I don't know enough... BluMagic Horse Training 15 03-28-2008 01:06 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome