I need advice/ideas - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 10:22 PM Thread Starter
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Location: West Alexandria Ohio
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I need advice/ideas

Okay after watching many and i mean many youtube videos, i have come to the conclusion me and my horse we arent close, she dont trust me, and she dont see me as a leader, she shows some respect but not all the time or consistently, in the field she never lets me catch her if i have a lead rope, or even without any rope at all. even times i go out there with treats she still dont listen. or come to me, i want a strong trusting relationship, but im at a loss, can someone give me tips ideas how to win her over, im starting tomorrow so please im begging i want this horse friend/owner relationship.

Thank you so much

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post #2 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 10:47 PM
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the first thing you never do is beg. you never beg a horse for anything. don't beg them to come, don't beg them to go, don't beg them to love you. Don't BEG them for anything. REQUEST it, then expect it. They will love you for that, in as much as a horse loves, because they know what to expect from you, and that you will be in charge.

Start with catching your hrose. If you walk out to see your horse and she chooses to move away from you, you make that choice a very uncomfortable one. Have you ever heard of "walking down a horse?" basically, you approach the horse, not stealthily, just normally and calmly , like you are going to walk up and pet her. If she turns away from you, then follow along behind her, and if she starts to really move away from you, then you take the whip or leadline and you swing it out at her and SEND her away. you make a commotion, behind her, such that she is startled and maybe she'll look back to see what it is. Likely , she'll run forward. If she does, you walk along behind her. But, if she turns back to face you, STOP. stand there and see if she'll turn around and face you. you might even back up a step. the idea is if she looks at you and thinks about coming to you, you do nothing that would drive her away. But, if she chooses to leave you, you drive her a bit so she gets a bit uncomfortable, and then wait for a second to see if she'll change her mind, look at you and come to you. read up on other threads here on how to catch a horse, there are lots of them.
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post #3 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 10:48 PM
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It is going to take time spent with your horse. Make every time you catch her an enjoyable relaxing experience and just get to know your horse. Do as much ground work as you can. Make being near you an enjoyable relaxing place to be. With no more info than what you gave us that is the best I can tell you. Just like with any relationship it takes time to build true trust.
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post #4 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 10:52 PM
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Hook your halter and lead in your left elbow and don't attempt to conceal it. Now, go walk your horse down but start by walking not directly to her by way circling around and approaching from behind. Do not look at her. When directly behind but a good 30' away, approach quickly and make her move but stay out of kicking range. Use just enough energy to make her move as you don't want her taking off to the far corners. When she moves, stand where she was eating for, oh, 20 seconds then circle around behind again. At first she will think she is running away from you but what is happening is you are making her move. This is what a horse higher in rank will do in the herd. He'll decided he wants to eat where she is and he moves her. This is what you are doing. Just keep doing it until she watches you with both eyes. This is important. Both eyes means she is focused on you. One eye means she's thinking of leaving. Perhaps take a step or two back to see if you get both eyes. When you do, look at her knees, slump your shoulders a little and approach with your hand extended in a loose fist, fingers down. This is how horses greet each other. Now step back a few steps and turn your back to her. Give her a little break then greet her again. She sees the halter but don't do anything with it just yet. Rub her cheeks and neck. Then rub her neck with the rope and slip it over her neck. Put the halter on and remove it five or six times then remove it and walk away. She may even follow you. Have a few treats by the gate and if she follows you, give her one then halter her again and give her a treat. If she doesn't want to be haltered, make her move, again, low energy. Spend the time now and it will be easier in the future. I have one that gets a little smarty once in a while and as soon as I start walking him down, he stops and turns to face me, ready to accepts the halter.
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post #5 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 11:03 PM
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I'd say just spend time with your horse. A relationship takes time as does building up trust. To some horses it comes easy and others... not so much. Also remember that not every time you bring your horse up has to be spent on riding/groundwork. Sometimes bringing them up just to brush on them and love on them can help them build a trust with their handler. I would demand respect all the time, and out in the field I would keep coming at her to catch her until she gave in and realized that one way or the other she's coming with me. lol

In my mind you can't force a horse to love and trust you but with time most learn to trust the people they work with. I approach them as a human who has a very primitive grasp of their language, not a horse, I've seen a few people get hurt that way, but that's just my opinion. :)
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post #6 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 11:05 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks for the advice i will be sure to do it tomorrow, im willing to work the whole day, tonighte we worked on ground work, lounging walking on lead rope, i just got on her bare back and walked, should i completely cut out all riding til we get this issue resolved.
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post #7 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 11:20 PM
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No I wouldn't, the way I figure variety is good. You don't want her to be in the mindset of no riding. Just mix things up and give it time, with my gelding who wanted nothing to do with us I just plopped in a roundpen and brought some brushes to groom him and just petted and loved on him. That's all my boss (she trains) does for the first few times she messes with a horse. She grooms them and spends time with them so that they'll trust her and make her job easier! Good luck!
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post #8 of 8 Old 08-15-2013, 11:42 PM
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First off, forget ideas of friendship or bonding. That comes in time. What she needs from you is being her leader, the one in charge. Horses look for a leader. If they don't find one, in the herd or you, they assume the role. If you don't take the leader role, your problems will get worse.

There are many threads on here about catching uncatchable horses. Walking the horse down is the best way IMO. It just take a fair amount of time. It doesn't happen over night. Once you do catch her, make it pleasant. Always end on a good note. Giving feed just before you turn her back out helps too. It doesn't need to be a lot, just like a cup or so. She will start to associate being caught with getting feed. Just like if you always work her once she is caught, she will expect that and not want to be caught.

Back to the leadership. Doing groundwork establishes this. You are showing her that you control her feet. You decide where she goes, when she goes and how she goes. Lunging, backing and yielding her front and rear end.

I would be cautious about riding her. If you don't have her respect on the ground, you'll have even less undersaddle.
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