Problem to join up with my mare!

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Problem to join up with my mare!

This is a discussion on Problem to join up with my mare! within the Natural Horsemanship forums, part of the Training Horses category

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  • 1 Post By HollyLolly
  • 1 Post By klkavich

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    06-21-2013, 10:54 AM
Problem to join up with my mare!

Hi! I have a beautiful islandic mare. She's almost perfect, beside she doesn't wanna be my parter quiet well. I used Monty Robert methodes on my previos horses and it worked perfectly. But this mare she just don't wanna join up.
I got her going I the round pen, 6 round's each way, twice. She started licking and chewing but didn't lower her head. Instead she turn around held her head high og looked away from me og turn her back on me. Then I tried all I could to get her going. But she didn't move an inch. Then I walked over to her to try get her going, she just moved to the other end of the round pen just the same way as before. It's like she's trying to get me join up with her? And not her joining up with me?
She's stubbern I the field and the other horsses have big respect for her.
Other wise, she's a dream riding in anyways. Without she wanna sometimes decide direction.
She's new here and I wanna join up with her so she can trust me. I feel and see she doesn't trust me at all. She never comes to me when I give her or the other horses food. She can turn her back on me and go in the corner scared. Thou I NEVER EVER have done ANY harm on her. She's been her in 6 months now.

Anyone that have an idea to how I can get her to trust me and join up with me?
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    06-21-2013, 06:58 PM
Does any one have an advice?
    06-28-2013, 02:17 PM
Hello, welcome to the forum. I've had the same problem with one of mine, she too is very strong willed and is the boss of the other horses. Sometimes she joins up and follows (but only for a moment) other times it never happens and I have to give up (I know that's really bad!)

Sadly, I have no advice as she is the only horse I've had such trouble with, but all I can say is, you're not alone. Try to have bonding sessions such as grooming Etc Make sure you can pick up all her feet, and that you can move her feet, making you the leader. Don't try to bribe with food, as, even though I knew it would never help, I got desperate and tried to bribe her as a last result, it made her no better at all.

In the end, my mare and I have got a little better bond, but I have to just accept that she'll never really want my attention, but I love her anyway, she's not nasty or pushy, just very independent.
tinyliny likes this.
    06-28-2013, 06:09 PM
I've done join up with almost all of my horses. As I'm sure you know, turning her back/butt to you is "disrespectful" and she's probably trying to show you she's the alpha (or at least that's my take on it). And from what you've said about how she is with the herd, out there she is the alpha. It seems from how you're explaining that she sits at one side of the pen and you go over to get her going again, which she then goes halfway around the pen and sits over there. Is that correct? If that's what she's doing, you should try staying more in the middle of the pen. I'd use my lunge line (not attached) to fling at her hind to move her forward (and not the clip end). Use a cotton lunge line and desensitize her to it first, by throwing it all over her legs, butt, back, etc. (all in a safe manner). Don't be afraid to increase your energy by being big and animated with swinging the line around in your hand or flinging it at her hindquarters. Remember, the whole idea of join-up is to emulate the alpha horse in the herd and drive your mare out, only then will she see you as the alpha. I'm sure you've seen her chase off one of the horses that are low on the pecking order, look at how she treats that horse, and copycat that energy and persistence.

You did say she was licking and chewing (and I'm going to assume inner ear was fixed on you, as this usually happened first for me), so you're obviously doing something right and making progress, but maybe once you see that you subconsciously relax a little or something, since you know you're also at the end. I had a mare that after inner ear and licking/chewing would want to slow to a trot and could trot for hours like that, so I learned to keep her at a canter to really push her out and make her uncomfortable out there. It took that same mare a few sessions to fully join up (and follow up) with me, but it eventually did happen.

I hope that helped in the smallest way, and best of luck to you and your mare!
HollyLolly likes this.

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