Won't curve neck anymore, grrrrr

Sounds to me like your release is not there. In flexing, it is not the pulling/pressure but the release that teaches them. Flexing helps them to be soft if you release when they try. If you release after she has been leaning, she has learned to lean. So, you have effectively taught her what she is currently doing.

Timing is hard to learn without help at first, you should take a clinic or get with an instructor.

Using a knotted halter ask the horse to move it's nose two inches to the side and let go. Continue to do this until she turns it as your hand approaches. This is training by inches and is often the best way to do it as once the horse accepts it it's there for life. Always be patient, never get angry or frustrated or you will fail. Gradually increase how far you ask her to turn. One day you will be able to ask with your pinky and she will follow the light pressure.

I was following CA who I thought said to not release until the horse has bent it's neck the full amount. She just never would do that, so yeah, I was releasing sometimes when she was leaning. I'll try a different approach, but I won't work on it as aggressively as I was. I think I'll focus on her barn sour first. It sure would be nice if she wouldn't give a mini-rear everytime I try to move her away from the barn

I'm thinking that your probably not practicing it enough.

With CA your supposed to do it at least 5 days a week, and I just don't think that a few days a month will get the softness that your looking for.

But you also don't want to drill it in their heads once they do it good then move on. My horse when he is learning something new he gets frustrated at first, so once he does it good one time on each side I will stop that exercise for that day. And when I try it again the next day its like a light bulb came on and he gets it.

And yes horses learn off of the release so once she gives to the pressure even if she's not touching her side or whatever just release.

I like CA as well but sometimes their NH methods don't work for every horse/rider..

I agree CA brings their head to their girth, but not at first, he does it in increments. If you put some pressure on and she give you gotta let go, there are phases to these things, it is like asking you to run a 5k if you never ran a step, you have to work up to it. I am glad you are asking, it can be very frustrating, but you cannot learn everything you need to know from a DVD. They are only covering that one moment in time with that one animal and each one is different.

Do you have anyone experienced in your area to help you?

I wish I had someone, but unfortunatly I am not very connected to the horse community around me. I keep my horses at home, and don't have a trailer, so it's basically just me and them.

Thank you all for the help. There's a lot of good advice here.