I'm on my last straw. - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:13 PM
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Has her saddle been checked by a professional saddle fitter? That can be a big issue.

I have come a long way, to surrender my shadow to the shadow of my horse.
/James Wright/
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post #12 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:14 PM
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Ultimately I think riding needs to be something you do for pleasure.

I owned a horse that just wasn't the right fit through and through. He was dangerous under saddle, absolutely loathed arena work but was a happy camper on the trail under a Western saddle. I got some help from a trainer and COULD have sent him to a professional, but I still believe we wouldn't have been 'happy' together. I wanted an English competitive mount, he wanted to settle with a happy hacker. I gave him away to some guy who does just that- THEN I leased a complete dead-head, super calm, totally obedient TB mare before I bought Jackson, she was absolutely perfect on the ground and under saddle but she had NO 'excitement' about her and what personality she did have was as 'snooty' as a horse could be. Not to mention she retained some track vices, most notably the fact that she would not. shut. up.

She was the perfect horse, but she wasn't perfect for me, so I ended the lease and bought Jackson. His conformation isn't as nice as hers was, he fits 'chestnut hot head' perfectly, and he gets grumpy when it's hot out BUT I feel confident and 'safe' on him, and I know I found the horse that is right. He's competitive, quick, an 'exciting' ride. It took a couple horses, but now I ENJOY riding again.

That said, I don't think selling your current horse and finding a new horse that works for you is a bad idea at all if you don't think this horse will work out in the long run. If you think you will be able to mesh under saddle after some training has been put into her, then find a professional. Either choice is the ride choice, so long as it makes riding a 'happy' sport.
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post #13 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:15 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Southwestern Idaho
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Yes it has been checked and fits very well.

Yes that is exactly what I think. I feel like even if she got the training she needed, I would still be uncomfortable on her. I am going to look into leasing the mare I rode the other day until I try out a few other horses and find the one that fits my needs.

I am still deciding which discipline I'm sticking with. (I think it's going to be western). So I want to do it right this time even if it takes me months or years to find the right horse for me. I made a mistake by choosing this horse the first time I saw her. And now this is what it has come to.

I think I'm going with option 2. Do you guys think this is the right choice?

Last edited by CrossCountry; 07-04-2013 at 04:20 PM.
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post #14 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:22 PM
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Agree with others. I made the decision to give up a horse as I finally had to admit he was too much for me to handle..he was, what I felt, my one and only failure..I had always been able to work down a problem horse. Fortunately I gave him up in time as I almost quit riding completely. Then the next horse I got gave me back the confidence i needed to keep riding.

If you have that much fear, like I had with the horse I gave up, you need to consider selling her and moving on. Even with a trainer, even if the horse came back transformed, you would always have that gut fear if it is ingrained deeply enough and at that point it would be unfair to both you and the horse if you can never again gain each others' trust.
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post #15 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:24 PM
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All I can say is that if your so called 'instructor' gave up after the horse slipped and did not want to be ridden then you need to get an instructor that knows what they are doing!

By the sounds of things you are over horses and to inexperienced to bring on a young horse get some experienced help from a good trainer and not some tinpot so called instructor.
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post #16 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:25 PM
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Well, if the training expense is too much, option 2 may be the only way to go.


May all your Trails be happy and safe ones

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post #17 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:36 PM
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For what it's worth - I agree with Fox! A riding instructor should be able to handle this behaviour with no problems.
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post #18 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:39 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2013
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I'm just tired. I've been thrown off so much, and I get back on but it's just destroying my confidence. I used to be able to get on any horse and ride, but now I can't. My confidence is gone and I am trying to get it back. I've ridden for a long time, gotten bucked off, kicked, stepped on, but I stuck with it. I'm trying to stick with it. \

I just can't work with a green horse, I don't have the training skills or the support from people to do it. I need to rebuild my confidence before I can do anything else.

You just never know what she's gonna do. And that scares me. I mean we'll be having a good day, and were both confident with each other and then suddenly she'll start a bucking fit. I haven't let her get away with anything, and she knows that. She'll respect me one day, and the next she'll be crazy!

I can control what she does, I can correct her and I can enforce correct training but my confidence is wavering and it's getting harder for me to enjoy riding.

But when I rode Dolly it just reminded me how much I love it. I mean the job that I want involves horses. (Go to CSU and study equine sciences.)

AH. I'm just torn and I don't know what to do.
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post #19 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:39 PM
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A good instructor should be able to teach you how to ride your horse, see what you are doing wrong & tell you what you need to do to fix it.
It sounds like your horse was well started as she was good for 3 weeks. Maybe she has been getting mixed signals from you & has finally given up trying. It's hard to know without knowing how you ride.
Does your instructor have the same problems with Misti?

You are new to each other & she is still green. Getting angry is the last thing you should do while getting to know a new horse.
You saying you got on a different horse & started cantering tells me that that horse has some miles on it & only over looked whatever you were doing.
Misti is not yet to that stage & may never be without slow careful instructing.

If your problems are at the canter then you first need to perfect the walk & trot. If your seat is unsteady or bouncing many nice horses will try to unload you, not out of meanness but more like trying to solve a problem (a bouncy, unsteady rider on their back).

Maybe you would be happier with a "Dolly" type horse but depending on how you ride, the "Dolly" could also change into something you don't like.

I would suggest you find an instructor who knows people & horse training. One who can tell what the rider is doing based on the horse's reaction & who knows how anticipate problems & correct them before they happen.
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post #20 of 33 Old 07-04-2013, 04:40 PM Thread Starter
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He did he took her in tight circles and worked her in the canter again until she did it on the first cue with no problem. She did not act out after he got after her. If I get after he she wont act out either. But I have to get after her with what feels every ride.

I have a steady seat so I don't think bouncing is the problem, She sat on pasture for 7 years so that may be a factor. She's a grumpy mare who hates working. By saying the first 3 weeks were good I meant we were confident together. She wouldnt walk forward for the first week or so and then when she did she would spook and run. I've got her pretty non-spooky, and she responds to one kiss and walks forward, two kisses and she trots, and pressure on the outside leg to canter. She is beautiful during transitions, and will work for about half an hour and then she just wants you off and will do anything to get you off.

Last edited by CrossCountry; 07-04-2013 at 04:48 PM.
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