I definitely agree with exposing yourself to experts. Sometimes just hopping on a horse and hoping things "work out" just doesn't actually work! I leased a mare that was very unsuitable for me - she was bolshy, stubborn, and very much a boss mare. I picked her up from a horse camp where a program allows campers to take home horses for the winter, so the horses get ridden and looked after before the camp season starts again. She was the last one there because nobody wanted her, but that didn't matter to me at the time! Anyways, we didn't click. I tried so many things with her, listened to many people who didn't know what they were doing, and at the end of the year, I was glad to give her back to her owners.
A few months ago, I bought my first horse. He's an OTTB (11 years old, so not fresh from the track!) and I'm keeping him at a property owned by an international dressage rider. The other boarder I see regularly is an ex-pony club instructor. Between the two of them, I've had amazing help and advice on how to deal with my horse, who's rapidly putting on weight and gaining energy as springtime advances! I literally don't know what I would do without them - Andy and I have our problems, but it's so much easier to work through them knowing that good advice is only a phone call away.
"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will finally know peace." - Jimi Hendrix