Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: The woods in the mountains of Appalachia
Ok, i'm just going to throw in my life experience, to put some light on life.
Yes, i'm married, have an amazing and loving husband, who would make a great father, but his priorities are f*%$ed. Me, i decided i never wanted kids, but wanted a life companion. Always had horses, my whole life they were there LITERALLY!!
Ok, i DID NOT have the baby itch when i got pregnant, when i found out i was 16-18wks. I cried for two weeks straight, i thought i was going to have to sell my horses. We currently still live in this horrid tin can trailer. I hated being pregnant, i couldn't sleep, couldn't eat tomatoes, or drink hot green tea. But i did ride my horses until i was about 20-22wks, then i physically could not get my big @$$ up into the saddle. My in-laws drove me nuts, telling me all the time if i rode the horse i was going to lose my child, i wasn't allowed to do hardly anything!!! I went ballistic! Then with the loving reassurance of my feionce (at the time) i finally accepted the fact of being pregnant, and did some soul searching. I was beginning to get excited for our bundle of joy, whom was a big surprise to us. We got married that November (found out i was prego in Sept.), 6 days later i lost my son. I was only 23 weeks. He lived for 2 days. My life had shattered around me. I fell into such a deep depression, i wanted to die. I literally did nothing for months. I felt i had failed, it was my fault, a few of my in-laws accused me of killing my son. Lets just say they are not part of my family, and never will be. I knew it wasn't my fault, it couldn't have been helped, and we still don't know why it happened. My husband knew i needed something to get me back into life. I found a photo-less ad for my paint i own now, i showed it to him, and requested pics. She was my valentine's day gift too, she came home in April. She is the reason i got back into my life, and got back into living and enjoying everything about it, and how precious it really is. I will never give up my horses. I can't, not after how much they have done and helped me through. Since that was my first experience with pregnancy, i'm absolutely terrified to try again, if i even do. For now i do have kids, 4-legged ones, 9 to be exact. And they are enough.
I hope this gives some insight as to how much life can change within a single day.
I do apologize for the novel.
~Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, Love leaves a memory no one can steal.~
Last edited by Elizabeth Bowers; 02-22-2013 at 02:24 PM.