I'm sure I'm not the only one... What do you say? - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 08:36 PM
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You did so very well. I assume you did not rudely retort , right?

I might pass this infor on to the 4H head, but I would not ask that the two children be removed. They should not be punished for the mother's bad behavior.

Next time , hop up and show off your mad riding skilz.
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post #12 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 09:03 PM Thread Starter
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See, that's exactly it, I didn't want to take it out on the kids, they are actually very sweet *must have a nice dad with that monster of a mother* and what I did was sit the other kids down and explained that it is not the childrens fault that their mother said something mean to me. One of the older kids got very upset and defensive over that remark and told her mom.

I don't want to cause a stir it was just such a surreal situation that I was completely out of control. And I wouldn't loose it in front of the kids ever. They deserve better than that.

As sad as it is though, the whole story kinda eats on my self esteem. When I was 160 lbs, I was at my best riding level ever. Now, at 200 lbs, I'm less flexible and I had to give up my competition horse due to old age. My new gelding is inexperienced and we have a long way ahead of us.

Long story short, I wonder if there was more truth to what she said then I want to admit.
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post #13 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 09:05 PM Thread Starter
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Oh, and for the situation: I grabbed the kids and just got myself removed from that monster's presence. After giving her a death stare that is. I didn't say a word. Sometimes, less is more, I thought.
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post #14 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 09:34 PM
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Regardless of what your own views are on your current capabilities and fitness, it is totally out of line for anyone to speak to you in those terms. If she got you thinking about something that's been hanging around in the back of your mind for a while, fine, so be it. But don't let her comments define your abilities, accomplishments or self-esteem. She was completely out of line.
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post #15 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 09:42 PM
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Originally Posted by MapleAir View Post
I didn't say a word. Sometimes, less is more, I thought.

*Nods head* difficult to do, but yes sometimes the best.
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post #16 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 09:45 PM
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Probably a jealous mother who doesn't like the fact that you are a very knowledgeable, kind and decent woman who can probably ride better than she'd ever hope to. Good for you for only giving her a stare. O.O Hope it chilled her to her bones and made her feel like a horrible b***. What's this world comign to.
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post #17 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 10:00 PM
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I don't accept abuse of any sort, ever. I would have had her kids moved to another group for 2 reasons. #1, she'd have had immediate repurcussions for her bad behaviour and #2, I would not allow those kids to remain because then she has the right to come back with them. I would make your superiors aware of the problem because if you don't, she may do it and spin it. If you don't go to them then it looks like you are hiding something. Don't let her do that to you.

At 200 lbs, you may be a tad less flexible and your really good, go to horse got old so you don't ride as much. There's only one way to fix that and that's to make this new horse your really good go to horse and start riding him like there's no tomorrow. I'm in the same position and a lot older than you, so I know all about inflexible, LOL!

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post #18 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 10:06 PM
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It is unfortunate for her children but no, I would not want to interact with her and having her children would cause me to interact with her.

I do not need that kind of baloney - I have had to deal with many frictards in business that are just the pits. But volunteer for it? Not on her best day. Perhaps if she finds herself and her children removed she might rethink her approach to people. And perhaps if she apologized in front of all I would rethink the removal. People like her think it is ok to be rude, pushy, obnoxious yet are often the most sensitive of their own feelings. =-(

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post #19 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 10:11 PM
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That is so freaking rude!! I can't believe someone would say that! I know there are people who think it but...how horrible can people be? I'm not a plus-sized rider but I've copped remarks about other stuff in the past and I've always been tempted to bring out Brock and say "Could you come and ride my horse and show me exactly what you're talking about please?". And laugh as he catapults them to the moon.

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post #20 of 41 Old 10-22-2012, 10:44 PM Thread Starter
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Haha, yes, I should have maybe told her she can put a ride on my poor abused horse and we'll see from there ;) The thing with moving the kidlets to another group is that it's flat impossible.
We are a very small club and there is only 3 groups. Cloverbuds, older kids and horseless kids (meaning they don't have their own horse), the latter being my group because I was once one of the girls who could only admire horses from afar and I would have killed for someone to give me the opportunity to learn and take the first small steps in the world of horsemanship.
Removing the kids completely or making a big fuss would not make anything better. The general leader for wind of the story through the mother of the other girl who was so upset when she heard what the monster said to me and the end result is that parents are not allowed with the children any more during meetings. They can be there, have coffee etc but not interfere. Which is fine because 99% of parents just come and visit anyways.

I'm in 4-H because I want to reach kids that no matter whether you are different in whatever way, you can become a wonderful horse person and horses give so much love back and I hope that the kids will understand tolerance and respect and compassion for animals and other people. That's all.
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