My Version of Black Beauty
I've decided to let myself make a journal here about my journey in training Boots and his big sister, April. As you may have guessed, it'll be mostly about little Boots. He was born May of 2011. I arrived 45 minutes after his birth. He was beautiful and adorable, and needless to say it was insta-love I couldn't permit myself to fall for. Recently, though, a sliver of an oppurtunity has presented itself. I have not yet decided if I'm absolutely sure that I'll buy him.
My parents pay my phone bill and car insurance. They tell me my car is about $100 - I often wonder if they are just tying to scare me with it. My papa has told me I don't deserve a horse until I can pay those bills myself. I could agree if it wasn't for my mental health - something my papa seems to have a hard time accepting. I suffer heavily from depression and nearly anything can trigger it or my suicidal behavior. I have a hard time holding back the need to drive myself into the trees some days. I'm also perma-stressed and have people anxiety so bad that work is rather difficult. I manage, but barely.
Horses have always made me forget my worries. To me, I have never had a human/animal partnership like me with a horse. I'm not saying I'm amazing, great, or even good with horses. I'm saying horses are amazing, great and good with me. They make my heart complete. I have rats who I love dearly, but not even they can fill that little hole.
The reasons I have given you are my reasons for seriously considering purchasing Boots while my parents are not looking. It's wrong, but it'll feel right. I don't care if I lose my phone, and I'll worry about my car when that bridge arrives. I need this - I need him.
So here it is. The journal of me, Boots, and the story we write.
Today I went out to visit him. I didn't get a lot of time with him. I spent most of the time trying to help Roger move Boots and the girls back to the grassier pasture.
Is it okay to feel nervous about training a horse? I wonder if I'll be any good at it, if he'll be happy with me as his owner. I bought his halter and lead rope. It's purple, and the lead rope's thread is the same purple with golden tan and silver twirled together. I think he'l look wonderful in it.
Am I doing the right thing?
Yesterday was a good day for us. He came so close to eating treats from my hand. Slowly but surely his coat is looking a little healthier. He followed me a little, then I started picking ticks off of his neck and he got mad. So, he wandered off to annoy his big sister. Hehe.
This is more about me. I find that I am learning a lot from this forum. Sometimes it depresses me. I'm glad I'm learning, but after going to the same horse ranch for so long and the owners always going on about how much they know, they didn't teach me much. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who is teaching me so much here.
Today was a fairly nice day with Boots. That is, if you don't count his attempts to nip me. He didn't succeed at all, and with how he acted, I guess he was just testing me. He would pin his ears and turn his head, his lips wiggling around making effort to reach me. All I had to do to end it was say no and grab the top of his neck and pushed him away, and each time he'd go back to munchin hay. He did it several times, though. I hope this doesn't happen too much more - I'd like to try haltering him soon. He didn't shy from it all, even when I jingled it near his head. He's calm. Onry, but calm. Any advice to make this stop when I've just started working with him?
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