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JamieLeighx 04-11-2012 06:20 PM

Need some advice
Well basically I've been an on/off rider all my life. I've always been around horses but my riding has never progressed, I've never had consistency so it's like every time I start back riding again I'm back to square one, it's like 2 steps forward 1 step back. I also think its partly because of how scared and anxious I am before I go to lessons ect I'm not scared of the horse I'm scared of what people will think of me and I think that if someone is watching me they are judging me and all that runs through my head is "omg am I doing this right?". I can't stand people watching me, not even my mum. The only person who I can ride in front of is my old instructor nobody else, because of this i haven't been able to continue with lessons as I would have to go to a new yard as my old instructor retired. Anyway, i have been asked to ride a 15.2 coloured mare that is a bit fizzy but there is no badness in her, I've to go to the woman's yard tomorrow and ride but I am so scared of riding in front of her! I ride so much better when it's me and the horse alone and I feel that I'm going to make a complete fool of myself. I'm usually a bubbly, confident person- especially with animals for example me and my dogs regularly show off their tricks in front of people, I work on a farm with cows and sheep ect but when I'm riding I'm totally different person! I just constantly feel I'm doing something wrong and that I'm being judged. Does anyone have any advice for tomorrow or just in general?
Much appreciated , Jamie x
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DraftyAiresMum 04-11-2012 06:26 PM

Just pretend it's just you and the horse. Concentrate more on the horse and what she is doing, not who is there or what is going on externally. This will be especially important since you're unfamiliar with the horse.

I used to be scared of what people thought of me or if I was doing something wrong...and not just with horses, with everything. I finally learned that it doesn't matter what other people think. It matters what you think and how you feel. If someone gives you advice or pointers, take it into account and say "Thank you." At the end of the day, no one else matters but you...and in this case, the horse.

JamieLeighx 04-11-2012 06:38 PM

Thank you so much for the advice! I just need to remember to focus and remember to breathe lol harder said than done but I'll give it a shot :)
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DraftyAiresMum 04-11-2012 06:43 PM

I was soooooo nervous about riding my gelding the first time. So nervous that I put it off for weeks. I had been thrown from a psycho mare a few months previous and the thought of getting up on my greenbroke gelding who is colored similar to the mare that threw me would send me into panic attacks. It made it even worse that my friend was there watching (even though she's super supportive and I asked her to be there, just in case something happened). Finally, because of a thread on here (The Big Girl Panties Thread), I made riding my gelding into a game. I had joked that I was going to go get a pair of big granny panties, put them on over my riding pants, and do a photo montage of putting them on, mounting up, and riding (sort of a "literally put my big girl panties on" thing). Guess what? Because I was focused on how much fun I was having and not caring what other people thought, I actually got on my gelding and rode him. A few weeks later, we went on our first trail ride.

My point? When I forgot about what was worrying me, I had more fun and was more relaxed. It seriously doesn't matter what ANYONE ELSE thinks. Who cares what they think? They're entitled to their opinion and as long as it isn't directly effecting you, they can bugger off. Heck, I still have the pics of me in my granny panties riding Aires (I'm sure he thought I was completely nuts...he still does :-P) and I still laugh every time I see them.

waresbear 04-11-2012 06:50 PM

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Once you get over the feeling everyone is watching you with a critical eye, it's a piece of cake. You fight that feeling and concentrate on your riding, the reward is much greater than the effort of pushing that feeling aside, you'll see.

JamieLeighx 04-11-2012 06:52 PM

That is amazing! It's wonderful how you got over you nervousness over a pair of panties lol. I will only be riding this mare for a short period of time as she is for sale but after taking in your advice If tomorrow goes smoothly I will most certainly be getting back into riding for good!
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