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NBEventer 12-12-2012 08:40 AM

How to stop negative energy from dragging you down
 
I share an office with 3 lovely ladies. However, they have a lot of negative energy surrounding them. It physically drains me. They are always talking about how they don't like this person or that person and whenever someone stops in the office to ask a question or just say hi they act all nice then the person leaves and they go on about how they hate that person.

I am very spiritual in a lot of ways. I feed off the energy of those around me. It gets very draining when I spend 8 hours in a closet with these women.

Now I tend to try and tune them out, I listen to music, ignore what they are saying. But the energy still feels very negative and draining.

I would love to just put headphones on and ignore them all day, however this doesn't work as I am on the phone a lot and doing various other things where head phones are not practical. Plus as I said, it still lingers in the air. Never mind the fact that it would just be rude. I try to stay pleasent and up beat hoping they will pick up on it. They truly are lovely ladies when they are not complaining about this person or that person.

I need to find a way to repell this negativity so I can stop feeling so drained and honestly it starts to make me catty and cranky. I have my "cubical" type deal. I am trying to make it my own positive space. Any ideas on how to add to the positive? I have my lucky bamboo, I have my music, I am going to put some pictures of Nasty Brat and my puppy and bunny. But I want physical things that can help keep my space pure and positive.

wetrain17 12-12-2012 10:07 AM

Misery loves company. Just remember that YOU decide your attitude, not them. Focus on the positives in your life when you feel like their comments are affecting you. Surround yourself with reminders of what make you happy.

DancingArabian 12-12-2012 10:18 AM

Ditto. You are relying on other people to make you happy - in your own words you are "feeding" off them. Be less involved and less concerned about what they're doing.

I work in a similar situation. Gossip and backstabbing run rampant. Once I stopped caring about what they were doing, work became better. I'm only planning on staying until I finish my degree in may then I am looking for new work.
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~*~anebel~*~ 12-12-2012 10:29 AM

I would obnoxiously remind them every time they start talking about people that it's rude, saying things like:
"Oh I bet Sarah's ears are burning"
"You catch more flies with honey than vinegar"
etc..

Stupid sayings like that drive most normal people up the wall. If that doesn't work, I'd get my superior involved. I honestly don't care what others (especially women) think about me in the work place when it comes to creating transparency in the office. One of many reasons I work in a male dominated field. If guys have issues with one another they either have words or a fist fight and then usually sit down to a beer. There's none of this petty talking about people when they leave crap, which I hate.

Good luck!

NBEventer 12-12-2012 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DancingArabian (Post 1795735)
Ditto. You are relying on other people to make you happy - in your own words you are "feeding" off them. Be less involved and less concerned about what they're doing.

I work in a similar situation. Gossip and backstabbing run rampant. Once I stopped caring about what they were doing, work became better. I'm only planning on staying until I finish my degree in may then I am looking for new work.
Posted via Mobile Device

Makes sense. I know it sounds silly but I just truly feel dragged down. Finding a new job is not an option. I have my foot in the door to a huge company that I have always wanted to work for. I love the company and I love the line of work. Hopefully I will wiggle over to where I want to be soon enough and wont have to be in this office much longer.

Until then I just need to keep ignoring them. The stuff they say is just brutal and they are truly insulting to me and the others in the office. I just don't understand how a group of grown women can be so nasty.

DancingArabian 12-12-2012 10:39 AM

It sucks - I feel you!

I'm not much of a boat rocker because I have a friend who tried firing back with comments and reporting it and ended up just being fired for not being a team player.

There is no I in team, but there's a ME and that's who you need to worry over. If they're nasty at you, get offended and fire back. Otherwise, pretend you're seeing someone letting their horse "play" by rearing at them. Facepalm, about face and be busy elsewhere.
Posted via Mobile Device

NBEventer 12-12-2012 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DancingArabian (Post 1795777)
It sucks - I feel you!

I'm not much of a boat rocker because I have a friend who tried firing back with comments and reporting it and ended up just being fired for not being a team player.

There is no I in team, but there's a ME and that's who you need to worry over. If they're nasty at you, get offended and fire back. Otherwise, pretend you're seeing someone letting their horse "play" by rearing at them. Facepalm, about face and be busy elsewhere.
Posted via Mobile Device

Yea... if I fire things back I know i'll get canned. I work in media, people are lined up for this job, or any position in the company. Its a very relaxed work place. As in "oh its 4pm on Friday, everyone drop what you're doing and come have a beer!".

Yet the politics in this place can be mind numbing. Its a pain in the rear. But you have to make the best of it I guess.

I got a "boo hoo cry me a river" when I told the woman who sits beside me(who happens to be my boss) that her hand cream triggers a migraine attack. She puts it on every time she comes back from the bathroom.

~*~anebel~*~ 12-12-2012 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NBEventer (Post 1795802)
Yea... if I fire things back I know i'll get canned. I work in media, people are lined up for this job, or any position in the company. Its a very relaxed work place. As in "oh its 4pm on Friday, everyone drop what you're doing and come have a beer!".

Yet the politics in this place can be mind numbing. Its a pain in the rear. But you have to make the best of it I guess.

I got a "boo hoo cry me a river" when I told the woman who sits beside me(who happens to be my boss) that her hand cream triggers a migraine attack. She puts it on every time she comes back from the bathroom.

There are ways to fix things like this. Like permanent hair dye in the hand cream. But you didn't hear it from me :lol:

NBEventer 12-12-2012 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~*~anebel~*~ (Post 1795811)
There are ways to fix things like this. Like permanent hair dye in the hand cream. But you didn't hear it from me :lol:

Ooo... you're evil. I love it! :lol:

Okay not to continue ranting but NOW they are going on about how they are mad that the Christmas party is not a sit down dinner. Like seriously? So they don't want to go now. Seriously? Can you ever be happy? *bangs head off desk*

Muppetgirl 12-12-2012 11:00 AM

Hang this by your desk:
“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.”
― Eleanor Roosevelt


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