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CrossCountryStar 12-29-2012 09:06 PM

Nervous About The Thought Of Moving Barns
 
So I have been riding at this farm for the past few years and I really enjoy it. I have made friends and the trainer is very good. But lately, I have been feeling out of place and alone. Most of the people are very nice but I feel and know that they talk about me behind my back. I also show but recently I haven't been able to show because of the horse I am riding. My instructor has had me riding on the only available horse and it is wayy below my riding level. I also feel like I don't belong there.

So I am thinking of trying out this barn that really looks amazing. They have a show team that I possibly could join. I just have a feeling that I belong there. It makes me happy just thinkin about it. They seem to have great horses there that I could show on and stuff because I just ride the horses under my level at y current barn.

But I am really nervous about the thought of switching. I have learned everything I know about horses there. I also made a lot of friends that I am a little upset that I can loose them. I also am nervous and scared about what my trainer, along with everyone else, would think of me. I don't want them to be ashamed or angry that I switched.

Like I said, I think I am goin to ask my mom if I can have a few lessons at that farm and check it out and am nervous as to what would happen if I fall in love with it.

Right now I would like to have people tell me what they think I should do and what I should tell my trainer and friends at the barn. I also want to talk to people who are going through similar situations.
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Mochachino 12-29-2012 09:32 PM

I would really check it out before making a decision. You could be jumping from the situation you know to one that you don't that could possibly be much worse, and then you'll regret leaving the other barn. I've been there and done that. Regretted it. You won't get away from people talking whatever barn you go to. If you want to check it out talk to a few of the boarders and ask them what they really like about the barn, what they would like to change about the barn if they could and one thing that they dislike. They may be honest with you. There are problems at every barn I have been at, it's just to what degree and whether you can change the situation. Thus the reason I am at a private barn with my two horses with no one else. Good luck to you!:D

CrossCountryStar 12-29-2012 09:37 PM

Thank you for replying. That is why I wanted to take a few lessons first because if I jump into it, I could regret switching and want to go back. If you don't mind me asking, what did you do after you regretted switching? Did you go back to your old barn?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mochachino (Post 1819963)
I would really check it out before making a decision. You could be jumping from the situation you know to one that you don't that could possibly be much worse, and then you'll regret leaving the other barn. I've been there and done that. Regretted it. You won't get away from people talking whatever barn you go to. If you want to check it out talk to a few of the boarders and ask them what they really like about the barn, what they would like to change about the barn if they could and one thing that they dislike. They may be honest with you. There are problems at every barn I have been at, it's just to what degree and whether you can change the situation. Thus the reason I am at a private barn with my two horses with no one else. Good luck to you!:D

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Mochachino 12-29-2012 09:40 PM

No I couldn't as she had already rented out my stalls. It was hard as where I live there is very very few places to board other than driving about 1/2 an hour or more to a barn. Anyway, you live and learn. Good idea to take a few lessons and just keep your eyes and ears open.

Spirit Lifter 12-29-2012 10:07 PM

Not the answer you want to hear but.....quit worrying about what other people think. Do what YOU want as long as it is legal and moral. Sometimes the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you!:wink:

CrossCountryStar 12-29-2012 10:23 PM

Thank you for that. It was the answer that I wanted to hear. You don't know how much I appreciate your comment. It makes me feel a lot better :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpiritLifter (Post 1820009)
Not the answer you want to hear but.....quit worrying about what other people think. Do what YOU want as long as it is legal and moral. Sometimes the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you!:wink:

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Muppetgirl 12-29-2012 10:30 PM

Hmmm, I thought about this for a bit. I'm thinking you need to take a positive approach to entering a new barn but also keep a positive note to leaving your old barn. As far as what everyone else thinks....keep upbeat, be positive and say politely 'I think I need a change, love it here, but I'm getting the itch to try something new' and that would be my answer EVERYTIME someone's asks why I would be leaving.

Entering a new barn can be a rocky road of nerves and anxiousness. Keep a low profile, smile and be cheerful:-). I am sure you will fit in just fine in time:-)

CrossCountryStar 12-30-2012 12:04 AM

Thank you for that. And that is what I probably will say of and when I switch

Quote:

Originally Posted by Muppetgirl (Post 1820031)
Hmmm, I thought about this for a bit. I'm thinking you need to take a positive approach to entering a new barn but also keep a positive note to leaving your old barn. As far as what everyone else thinks....keep upbeat, be positive and say politely 'I think I need a change, love it here, but I'm getting the itch to try something new' and that would be my answer EVERYTIME someone's asks why I would be leaving.

Entering a new barn can be a rocky road of nerves and anxiousness. Keep a low profile, smile and be cheerful:-). I am sure you will fit in just fine in time:-)

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Spirit Lifter 12-30-2012 12:14 AM

Glad I could help CrossCountryStar. At my ripe old age of 51, you learn a few things in life to make things simpler. I know it's a tough decision, but follow your gut and again, don't worry about what other people say or think. Hold your head high and live life for YOU!:D

AlexS 12-30-2012 01:15 AM

At a new barn, people might well talk too, the whole horse world is like that.

If you think you could progress more with your riding at the new place. I would tell the old barn that you are taking a break for a month. Ride at the new barn, make sure it's everything you want it to be - and then leave the old barn under good terms.

If you leave well, you can always go back. Don't leave because Amy Becky, Cindy did D, E and F events. Just be reasonable and polite and explain. Or lie, and say new barn is closer etc.


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