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horsesareforeverr 01-26-2013 07:46 PM

Trainer Favoritism?
Have you ever had a trainer that shows blatant favoritism to another or several other riders? Even telling them that they will win over their other pupils at a horse show? If so share your stories and tell what you did. Would you consider switching trainers over this even after many years of training with them?

hca 01-26-2013 07:53 PM

Yes but i was always the one that was favoured. Imo the trainers use that as motivation to make the other students try a little harder.

JaphyJaphy 01-26-2013 08:59 PM

My current trainer favors another one of her pupils. Three or four of us ride in lessons together, and my trainer has said before that she doesn't like the horse I ride. I feel that not as much attention is paid to me (in terms of helping me improve my skills - I don't need to be babied but I do expect feedback on what I'm doing so I can develop good habits) even though we pay the same amount. I am currently looking for a new trainer for the upcoming spring/summer.

That being said, she is a very good coach (as opposed to "instructor") and very keen and supportive when working with students one-on-one.

horsesareforeverr 01-26-2013 09:15 PM

Thanks for the input guys. I just feel like theres one girl that my trainer favors so much more than the rest. I love the girl to death but its extremely obvious. My trainer went to her about leasing and has an entire plan about how she will win the show series when I had to chase her down about finding a horse (still haven't yet) And she has a plan of how the other pupil is going to win year end champion which is perfectly okay but against her other kids and she hasn't said a single thing to any of the others about how we place in the shows. I'm trying not to be jealous and I probably sound ridiculous right now but it just seems wrong. And the girl doesn't have any more drive or even money than anyone else do I'm just confused. Sorry if I sound like a complaining brat I'm just having a pretty bad time with all this at the moment.

waresbear 01-26-2013 09:26 PM

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Yes, my instructor clearly favors those who work hardest and practice what she teaches. I don't see her giving any less instruct or attention to her other students, but you can tell who she likes. We all pay her money, we all get our money's worth but the ones who really listen, practise & excel are her favs, we get invited out to dinner with her after shows and she will even come out on her free time to our houses to help us with things.
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horsesareforeverr 01-26-2013 09:31 PM

It makes tons of sense for a trainer to favor harder working students but this person doesn't work any harder than the rest of us. And its not like shes at a higher riding level or any more talented than many of my trainers other talented pupils.

AlexS 01-26-2013 10:36 PM

It's human nature to connect more with some than others, obviously those who try harder as others said. But then also for others, those who are more like us, or come from depressed backgrounds that you want to help more etc. Or even just something like a sense of humor than is aligned.

As long as you are all getting the same quality when you are paying her, I don't think it matters.

tinyliny 01-26-2013 11:24 PM

I have seen this a lot. What I figure is that either the favored one is making more "noise" for attention (you know, the squeeky wheel gets the grease), or is physically prettier (believe me, it matters), or may have more natural charisma, or may have an inate feel for horses that the instructor recognises and wants to foster. Any one of those would be bound to make you feel a bit jealous. But, you know, it happens. you can either accept it or move on.

hca 01-26-2013 11:37 PM

maybe she knows the instructor personally or her parents do ?

trust me if it had anything to do with looks i would not have been favored for sure lol i was always playing in mud puddles catching frogs and throwing manure at my fellow students hehehe

Deschutes 01-26-2013 11:43 PM

I don't know if you would call it favoritism, but, I took lessons under a gentlemen once, who taught extremely light horses, and taught (us) his students how to ride with light hands and ride light horses.

I did really well under his practice. Enough that I rode his wifes horse, who was her favorite out of all the others we rode.

No one else during the time I went had this priviledge. But it was because I listened and practiced that I got to do that, and it was a great experience.
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