The Horse Forum

The Horse Forum (/)
-   Jokes and Funnies (http://www.horseforum.com/jokes-funnies/)
-   -   Horse Joke Thread-Share yours! (http://www.horseforum.com/jokes-funnies/horse-joke-thread-share-yours-189337/)

Tobysthebesthorseever 05-07-2013 11:03 PM

Horse Joke Thread-Share yours!
 
My friend wants to post a riddle on here. Now it is her typing-not me.

So, a horse was Suspicious of his owner's wear abouts so he decided to get a tracking device to put on his owner. He somehow got a tracking device into his owner's underwear. The horse tracked his owner on his computer that he somehow acquired for a whole week and nothing happened. The horse decided to run away and was never seen again. Can you guess why?!?!


(The answer she tells me is that the owner wore the same underwear for a whole week and the horse ran away cuz he thought it was gross.)

Now for yours!!


(Sorry about that. She's a bit younger than me :wink: haha she says noooo don't! So just kidding. She pretty cool.)

TaMMa89 06-15-2013 03:23 PM

Well...

Girl arrives at her weekly lesson and gets the most wildest horse to ride. Before going to the trail ride lesson, the instructor asks if everyone has whips and helmets with them. Being annoyed for the wild horse, the girl mutters quietly that she has had to lose her mind while coming here today. Instructor, hearing this, says that she's interested just about things that riders had with them while arriving at the lesson.

...

A young lady is talking about experiences that she had while being at circus yesterday. The lady says:
'Riders were the most amazing thing there. You see, at first they rode the horses normally. After this, under stomaches they went. Finally, they ended the show hanging on the tails.
Other young lady will interfere in the discussion:
'Nah, that's nothing. I rode like that on my very 1st lesson'.

...

Judge on the court:
'Your husband blames you on kicking him at first, then biting him'.
Wife: 'well, he treats me like a horse!'

SouthernTrails 06-15-2013 03:54 PM

.

A lady who was all ready to take a horseback ride said to the cowboy, "Can you get me a nice gentle pony?" "Shore," said the cowboy. "What kind of a saddle do you want, English or western?" "What's the difference?" asked the lady. "The western saddle has a horn on it," said the cowboy. The lady said "If the traffic is so thick here in the mountains that I need a horn on my saddle, I don't believe I want to ride."


.

JustWingIt 06-15-2013 04:37 PM

Two horses are staing at a hitching post. One horse turns to the other and says "my name is Whoa Dammit, what's yours?"
Posted via Mobile Device

Golden Horse 06-18-2013 01:02 PM

Guess I'll add this one here, for those of us whose minds go blank when we ride into the dressage arena:

https://fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.n...08086041_n.jpg

and some kiddy jokes for you

Q. What does it mean if you find a horseshoe?
A. Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.

Q. When do vampires like horse racing?
A. When it's neck and neck.

Q.What is the difference between a horse and a duck?
A.One goes quick and the other goes quack!

Q. What do you call a pony with a sore throat?
A. A little hoarse.

Q. What's a horse's favorite sport?
A. Stable tennis.

Q. What do you give a sick horse?
A: Cough stirrup.

Q. Why do cowboys ride horses?
A. Because they're too heavy to carry!

Q. What did the horse say when it fell?
A. "I've fallen and I can't giddyup!"

Q. What do you call a horse that lives next door?
A. A neigh-bour.

Q. Where do horses go when they're sick?
A. The horsepital.

Q. Why did the horse eat with its mouth open?
A. Because it had bad stable manners.

EvilHorseOfDoom 06-28-2013 09:42 AM

Not a typical riddle joke, but just found this anonymous quote and nearly died laughing:

Quote:

A woman needs two animals - the horse of her dreams and a jackass to pay for it.

Tobysthebesthorseever 06-29-2013 04:02 PM

LOL!!! hahaha some of these are just absolutely awesome!

xlionesss 06-29-2013 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EvilHorseOfDoom (Post 2917282)
Not a typical riddle joke, but just found this anonymous quote and nearly died laughing:



Definitely my favorite! Gotta tell this to my boyfriend LOL

Tobysthebesthorseever 06-29-2013 04:15 PM

http://www.selwynrakaiaridingclub.co...ctures-931.jpg
http://data.whicdn.com/images/121122...1925_large.jpg
http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:A...vXvZf9QARpuFvE

Oh gawsh! Not the bedazzler!!! I'm pretty sure Toby will be like that soon...

phoquess 07-14-2013 10:30 PM

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v5...49196145_n.jpg


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:16 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0