The Horse Forum

The Horse Forum (/)
-   Barn Maintenance (http://www.horseforum.com/barn-maintenance/)
-   -   A slight dilema. (http://www.horseforum.com/barn-maintenance/slight-dilema-21610/)

Shawken 01-27-2009 06:14 PM

A slight dilema.
 
Hi there ! Before I start, cookies to all that finish this, I love you !

I am new to this forum. I own a Tennessee Walking Horse named Shocking. His show name is Shocking Affair. He is 9 years old. I currently event him, and he loves it. I have been riding for awhile but never really had a coach.

So, I bought my horse. I kept him at the barn where he was purchased because the price was decent, coaching and care was good, and the facilities impecable (sp?).

I convinced my friend to move her horse from her cozy little private barn, to come and enjoy the luxuries I was enjoying. Life was great, to be honest.

Lately, I have been having a few difficulties around my barn. :cry:
The coach is demanding now, and sometimes quite grouchy. She allows her frusteration and impatience to interfere when my horse and I have difficulties. I tend to be a nervous rider, and as a sensitive person, I tend to get teary and frusterated. Lessons are not fun. :?

I also can't be pushed to hard, or I tend to have mental blocks. Needless to say, I have a bold personality, and she does as well. You never know if she'll be in a good mood.

She just sent us an email, a week in advance to Febuary 1st, that there is a rate change starting Febuary 1st. It is only a $25 dollar raise, but I am having difficulties affording board at $450 anyway. I am fifteen years old and pay for the horse myself. She also added a crud load of rules, to cover all bases.

On the other hand, I love my barn to pieces. The boarders are great people, the facilities are beautiful, people help alot and lastly, my friends are there. I just am starting to dislike it all because of the coach.

My friend, who I brought to the farm is leaving March 1st. She loved it like me at first but it's changed. We just revieled this to eachother recently. We agreed to go together somewhere. However, she is moving to her previous farm. There is no interest for me at that barn, and besides there is no room.

I have look at a farm that is $50 dollars cheaper for the same type of facilities. There is a trail from that barn to my best friend's barn (the one she is moving back to).

I want to go to this new farm badly, but I don't want to leave .
:-x
My friends are there, and I love everything else except the coach and the price. Oh, and it's mandatory for lessons.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ?

cookies, cake and chocolate milk for anyone who read this.

Vidaloco 01-27-2009 06:46 PM

I guess it depends on how you want to spend the time you have with your horse. If you want to spend it being brow beaten to tears, but have your friends there for moral support then stay where you are. If you want to spend the time with your horse and only your horse with possible trail rides with your friend, then move to the other barn.
I'm much like you, if someone is harsh to me I have a tendency to get a lump in my throat and want to cry. It would not be fun for me at all in those circumstances. I want my horse time to be fun not cause for tears.
I would be looking for a new barn if I had to take lessons along with the board too. If you decide to stay there you need to have a heart to heart with your coach. Let her know you don't appreciate being brought to tears by her lessons.

Welcome to the forum by the way

Shawken 01-27-2009 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vidaloco (Post 239673)
I guess it depends on how you want to spend the time you have with your horse. If you want to spend it being brow beaten to tears, but have your friends there for moral support then stay where you are. If you want to spend the time with your horse and only your horse with possible trail rides with your friend, then move to the other barn.
I'm much like you, if someone is harsh to me I have a tendency to get a lump in my throat and want to cry. It would not be fun for me at all in those circumstances. I want my horse time to be fun not cause for tears.
I would be looking for a new barn if I had to take lessons along with the board too. If you decide to stay there you need to have a heart to heart with your coach. Let her know you don't appreciate being brought to tears by her lessons.

Thank you so much ! That is great advice . I think I am going to move there but I am afraid I am shutting a door of friendship, you know?

Vidaloco 01-27-2009 06:52 PM

Just blame it on the rate change. They can't argue with that, and I'm sure they are expecting to lose a few boarders after the hike.
If all else fails blame it on your parents. Thats what I used to do when I was a teenager :lol:

Shawken 01-27-2009 06:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vidaloco (Post 239675)
Just blame it on the rate change. They can't argue with that, and I'm sure they are expecting to lose a few boarders after the hike.
If all else fails blame it on your parents. Thats what I used to do when I was a teenager :lol:

LOL! That is to funny. I was going to blame it on the rate change and my lack of money sources. :shock: Great minds think alike. Your convincing me more and more by the second. Now, I just need to find out if this new farm is everything I have been told it is :)

StormyBlues 01-27-2009 08:41 PM

I knida had the same delima too. My coach never let me move up and she was just mean. I moved to our own farm and am able to spend every day with Blue and I love it! And I am also with the coach that taught me to ride, and I really love her. I have spent three hour car rides with her and spent a weekend with her in a hotel room at a show! We get along great and she really sees that I am a good rider. I think that if you don't get along with the trainer and she yells at you for no reason, it is time to move on, tell your friends that it isn't them. If they really are your friends they should understnad! WELCOME!

Shawken 01-27-2009 08:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StormyBlues (Post 239762)
I knida had the same delima too. My coach never let me move up and she was just mean. I moved to our own farm and am able to spend every day with Blue and I love it! And I am also with the coach that taught me to ride, and I really love her. I have spent three hour car rides with her and spent a weekend with her in a hotel room at a show! We get along great and she really sees that I am a good rider. I think that if you don't get along with the trainer and she yells at you for no reason, it is time to move on, tell your friends that it isn't them. If they really are your friends they should understnad! WELCOME!

That makes alor of sense. Looks like I better start searching around. I am not sure if I am going to go to this new farm or a different one. :-P

Thanks!

1dog3cats17rodents 01-27-2009 09:39 PM

If I was you I would leave. Try to find a barn with people similar in age to you, and you should make new friends quickly. If possible, perhaps you could visit the barn you are at now to see your friends, or meet with them away from the barn. Good luck!

Walkamile 01-27-2009 10:55 PM

Shawken, I want to thank you for the yummy cookies, cake and chocolate milk, really hit the spot!

I agree with the good advice you have already received and wish you good luck. Remember the time we spend with our horses should make us feel better, never worse. In the past, whenever I would start feeling tense ect... I would step back and evaluate what was contributing to that feeling and then make a decision. Trust your Gut!! :wink:

Shawken 01-28-2009 07:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1dog3cats17rodents (Post 239807)
If I was you I would leave. Try to find a barn with people similar in age to you, and you should make new friends quickly. If possible, perhaps you could visit the barn you are at now to see your friends, or meet with them away from the barn. Good luck!

The barn I am looking at had several girls my age, as a few go to my school. I am just afraid that when I leave, my friends won't be interested in having me around or no longer being my best friends. I know that if they are good friends, then they won't. I still can't stop worrying. You know? I am afraid the coach will get defensive and not allow me back on. Even thought, I plan to blame the rate change :wink:.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Walkamile (Post 239863)
Shawken, I want to thank you for the yummy cookies, cake and chocolate milk, really hit the spot!

I agree with the good advice you have already received and wish you good luck. Remember the time we spend with our horses should make us feel better, never worse. In the past, whenever I would start feeling tense ect... I would step back and evaluate what was contributing to that feeling and then make a decision. Trust your Gut!! :wink:

Very good advice! Thanks so much.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:55 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0