The horse that saved my life.
This is just about the day I got my horse, every bit of it is true.
It was October the 18th 2011. A Tuesday. I had endued yet another terrible day at school, everyone in my year making up new rumours, new jokes. Each more horrid than the last. I had spent the whole 6 hours in each and every lesson in tears. Not one person cared, they just laughed. That was going to be my last day at school in my eyes, I was never going to see these people ever again. I planned in my head each and every way I could end this torture that is and was my school life. I came to the conclusion that a knife would do the job, when everyone was in bed that night. The planning I had done in my head was done without gaps. There would be nothing left to chance.
On the bus ride home the jokes continued, I had a tomatoe squished on my head and an egg sandwich rubbed into my face. When the bus finally reached my stop, I got off, crowd the road and ran home, crying. Lucky for me I lived less than a minute from my house.
I was quick to get in the shower so my mum and brothers didn't see me. As soon as I was out and dressed I received a phone call from my mum telling me I had a riding lesson, she was late home so dad was going to take me with my brothers. Quickly, I was upstairs and getting into my riding jodhpurs and boots. Once done, my dad turned up, me and my two brothers got in and drove to the yard which was just 3 miles down the road.
5 minutes later we arrived. Finally. I walked into the barn where my mum was stood with Vicky (the yard owners daughter), talking. My mum looked at me and told me to tack the horse up in the middle right stable. So I went over, saw my beautiful chestnut 4 year old mare. I looked between my mum and the horse before bursting into tears and hugging my horse tight. Being a horse, she pulled back and went to eating her hay. I was baling my eyes out and for once it was for a good reason. Before I went in the stable, I had to ask if I was allowed to first. Considering it was her first time moving since she was 2 and a half and had only been there for a few minutes, she was very relaxed.
As I stood and groomed MY horse I cried. I was going to have her for the rest of her life and was never going to let her go. That was the day I made the decision that I was going to put up with the people at school and live to make her life the best it could be.
To this day I have no-one to talk to at school, even two years later and in year 11 the same immature and horrible jokes have me in tear nearly every day. I have always put my horses welfare over my own. This is the horse that took 10 months of me working with her before we were allowed to buy her. She took 6 months to accept both and rider and saddle happily. I now have my best friend with me and she quite literally is the horse that saved my life.
That's awesome that you found her! Though, as for those people, just remember this : "Anyone who tries to pull you down is already bellow you". Or something similar: "Anyone who tries to break you down, is already broken" - they have to pester you to feel better about themselves. Don't worry about them. I'm not saying it's easy to go through all that. It's amazing that you've went through all that without letting them get to you. You already won, they are still trying, but you already won.
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So happy that you have this beautiful horse and she has you!!!! Not one of those kids at school could ever claim this kind of horsemanship and you have a life they could never imagine. "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt. How is the phrase in England? "Today's worries are tomorrow's chip paper." Enjoy your wonderful life with your horse! :)
Never really hard any of those phrases before but I'm just looking forward to getting out of school.
Beautiful. Stay strong!
I have no words... your story is so touching. Gah, now I am wishing I was still in my schooling years (I just gratuated actually) and at your school with you, you dont deserve that kind of treatment (I was bullied too, and often depressed and in tears many a time, to the point my mum was threatening to take me out of my school without warning). I am so glad you have a horse now that you can focus on and help you through these times, they are an amazing friend. I for one am glad you are still here, though I do not know you from a bar of soap, you seem like an honest and appreciative young lady. Chin up, times get tough, but there is so much to live for - including Ginny now :)
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