my mare does not like to be touched!!
we just got a new mare and she does not like to be touch!!! she has no respect but is very "tame" and not sensitive at all!! i can crack a whip and she could care less. doesn't even look at me. she is also not very smart! poor girl! she gets lost in our 4 acres of woods that is in the middle of our pasture and cant find her way out. serious!!!! and there are other signs of course. anyway how can i get her to connect with me? i have NEVER met a horse that did not like to be petted yet she has been out to pasture for at least 2 years. she is 3 1/2. any suggestions?
What breed is she? How old is she? What is her previous experience with handling, training, etc?? That is extremely vital information. But, I will try to offer some insight for what I can see is going on with her.
She has been turned out for 2 years. This usually implies that she was not handled much, if at all. And even though she may not be sensitive, she is still not accustomed to the feel of human hands all over her. That can change once you start working with her and put her into a routine.
I would recommend a stall or living area for her for two reasons. She first needs a designated area in her own mind which she considers "safe" and "home". She can not only learn to be groomed and handled there, but will find comfort and security, and a familiar place to get back to. She will also learn the path back to her stall/home instead of getting lost. She will remember the way back. If she is roaming around the paddock with no landmark, she will get lost and continue to have feelings of insecurities. The other reason is so that you have place to keep her inside when you start handling her. I do not recommend working with her in just a wide open area. If you want to focus on communicating with her, you would be better of in a smaller area, even if it's a small round pen. She should be halter broken again and learn to tie safely as well.
This is one example of why I like working with horses when they are foals and not leaving them turned out for a couple of years and then bring them in for training later on. I am a firm believer in working with horses consistantly, while still allowing them "grow up time" or "kid time" without taking away their fun youngster days. You are now having to deal with a horse that needs to basically go back to square one all over again. Please be careful, but be consistant, confident, and thorough and you will do fine. Let me know how things progress...:)
jewels is a full quarter at 3 1/2 years old. they handled her lots up until a couple of years ago. since then she has been in a pasture with about 10 other horses on their own. she is very gentle when pulling away to halter or not wanting to be sprayed with fly etc spray or pulling burs out of her hair she just blows me off!! she really just does not have any thing to do with any of us. she isn't scared or interested just there. she eats what we give her and goes on her way. i do have a small area with a barn that's where i feed them but the woods are thick and ther are only a couple of ways in and out and she just getts on the other side and cant get back!! she does have a 4 month old on her idont know if that makes a diff or not. i am trying to get her haltered right now then to tie and lead as well are the most important things right now. she doesn't mind me touching her well it's kind of like she is saying she is too good for me to touch her. she isn't scared at all or flintch or pull back when i go to her she just blows me off!! it's odd. we have only had "trained" horses all our lives so this is new to me.
Well if she doesn't bolt away or act up, then I wouldn't worry too much about anything other than what I mentioned before, just daily handling, grooming, etc., and getting her back into a routine.
Now that I know she has a foal with her, just keep in mind that unless they are able to be apart with no problems, you may want to keep the foal nearby when you tie her and work with her because if the foal wanders off, she could stress over her baby leaving and pitch a fit. But at 4 months of age, mom and baby are probably both ready for some alone time.
It sounds like you will be ok, hope all goes well :)
well i had a man come out here yesterday. people around here call him a "horse whisperer" but he is really great with them. he has parrelli. anyway he did really good with her and after an hour session i could see sooo much of a diff. i was trying to make her do it and it gives her the choice to do it the right or "easy" way as clinton anderson says it. i like him too. man she was VERY stubborn at first and he had a very hard time with her the first 30 minutes then finally she moved up and she was pretty easy going aftr that. she just had no idea what he was doing or what he wanted from her! she started trying to get away form him. i had started walking the other way and she wanted to follow me and of course as soon as she moved he let up pressure and that's all it took for her to realize what he wanted but i guess she had some sort of feelings for me her and tinker too because the both kept trying to come over to me and tinker"baby" kept standing by me. not too close thought!! he said i was their "safe place" otherwise mommy help me!1 too cute but maybe i can get to her now!! them both actually!! he also tole me i was feeding too much!! :( but i was feeding less than what the prev owners were!! i hope we are on the right track now!! thanks for the advice!!
How is her vision?
Are you sure that she isn't blind or something, wich might be a reason for such behavior?
no she sees fine as far as i can tell she has absolutly no respect of any kind!! we are working on that!! slow but surely she is coming around. she just doesn't want to be with me at all!! we are working on our relationship and our 7 games by parelli! that is helping. she was a donimate mare in her herd of about 10 other horses and had been all her life. she hadn't been messed with for 2 1/2 years or so and did not think i should be messing with her or that she wants anything to do with me. but like i said we are getting there.
if she does not like being touched try giving her food then when she is occupied with food touch the neck or behind the ears
Rider in the Mist has offered some good advice =)
One thing i can say, is:
Set goals for yourself when you go out to see her. If your goal is to pet her without her pulling back.. then meet it, but DONT exceed it! Your goal can take as long as an hour, or as short as 5 minutes, but just be sure that once your goal is reached, leave quietly.
A common mistake is "Wow, she doesnt mind this! Let me keep doing it!". Ive seen many people ruin their horses this way. They set out to JUST put a halter on a colt. So they go out, and it only takes about 5 minutes to catch it and halter it. Since it didnt take that long they think "Wow.. why dont I teach him to lead too?" So then after a 25 minute struggle, the horse is leading (in what i call a suitcase.. where you loop the leadrope behind the butt and infront of the shoulders and hold the end over the back like a suitcase... its hard to describe.. lol). Once that goal is reached, they decide to try to teach the colt to trot in hand on the lead, or to lead without the suitcase. Soon the colt is VERY frustrated. Every time he does something good, he is rewarded by MORE WORK. Ive seen many jumping horses go sour this way. The owner is impressed that they jumped a certain jump, so they keep raising the bar until the horse quits.
Wow, im long winded!
Anyways, i hope this helps ya hun! Got any pictures of her?
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