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Icrazyaboutu 12-20-2009 12:52 AM

My story
I'm making this up. On the spot. Sorry if it sucks.. leave me comments telling me what to change!

Sarah was on her way to the barn when she got a call. It was her barn owner telling her she needed to hurry to the barn. Something was wrong with Skar. She told her mom to hurry and started thinking the worse. When she got there Skar was thrashing on the ground. Her eyes were rolled to the back of her head and her teeth were scraping the cement floor that use to be covered by the wood shavings. Sarah had never seen a horse so close to death. She had no idea what to do.
"Whats wrong with her!?" Sarah yelled.
"Colic. It doesn't look good. I'll get her halter and you can't start walking her. Whatever you do, don't let her lay down!" Said Ted, the barn owner.
"OK, ok." Sarah said. She was on the ground. Petting her mare's soft muzzle. "You'll be ok girl, I promise. I won't let anything happen to you."
The barn owner handed her the halter and she immediately started maneuvering it around her face and the ground.
"Got it on. Now help me get her up! Someone call the vet!" Sarah shouted.
Her mom dialed the vet and the barn staff and Ted piled into the barrel racer's stall. They counted, one. Two. Three! Nothing. She was too heavy. They needed more people.
"Try again! We can't give up! We can't!" cried Sarah.
After seven more times men slowly started leaving the stall. One by one until Sarah was the only one still trying. She knew she couldn't do it alone.
"Come on girl! It's not your time! Don't go!" and the next thing she knew, Sarah was sobbing on her mare's shoulder and Skar was completely still. Sarah's mom told her they had to go. She said Skar had passed on and they were wasting their time. Sarah wouldn't accept it. She tried one last time.
"Come on Skar. This is your last chance. Choose life. I need you Skar!" as if the mare knew what it meant to her owner for her to live, she started trying to get up. "Come on girl! Your almost up!" Sarah was helping her support her legs and together, Skar was standing.
The vet walked through the barn doors at that very moment. He was told all he had to do was pronounce her dead. He strode to the stall saying "Well, I may be old but that mare sure as hell don't look dead to me."
"She woulda been if I had listened to them." Sarah said pointing at the barn staff and her mom.
"Well, I'm proud of you honey! I knew you could do it!" said her mom.
"Yea... sure..." Sarah replied under her breath.
"Well, you have to walk her around, keep her moving,don't let her roll. If you want, I can euthanize her. I know most people don't want to but colic in older horses can really affect them sometimes." said the vet.
"No. I'm going to get her back to herself. She will go when it is her time. Not a planned time." replied Sarah.
And so the recovery began.

What do you guys think so far?

LoveStory10 12-20-2009 02:52 AM

I like it... Its very touching. I like how she refuses to give up when everyone else did, and then how everyone else pretended they hadnt given up... The horses name is rather wierd, but I still like it LOL! Keep going, I love it

Icrazyaboutu 12-20-2009 10:00 AM

Thanks! Yea, I know its a wierd name but at first it was Star and thats too normal so I changed a letter.

Icrazyaboutu 12-20-2009 03:30 PM

Sarah spent weeks brushing through Skar's soft chestnut coat and walking her to make sure she was completely free of the horrible sickness that almost took her away. She could tell Skar had changed. She thought it was for the better for Skar had seemed more grateful for life. Sarah knew that incident had changed her life. She never complained about cleaning the stalls like she use to. She spent the night every Friday and Saturday in Skar's stall. No one thought that was smart, but no one knew how strong their bond was. The memory of the night of the incident constantly came to Sarah in her dreams. She woke up screaming, wondering what would have happened if she, too, had given up hope. The only nights she could sleep well was in the barn. She needed her mare close.
After 5 weeks of recovery and care, Sarah finally got the courage to sit on the brave mare's back. She got up and laid back, resting her head on the mare's wide bum. She was at peace and so was Skar. She unlocked the stall door and rode the mare to the arena using nothing but leg cues. She felt so normal up there. Like nothing had happened. Then something terrible happened. Skar fell to her knees and was struggling to get up. Sarah jumped off and grabbed her legs as if to help lift some of the weight. The mare laid down and Sarah could see the fear in her eyes. She had to get her up! "Come on girl! We can do this! Together..." She ran to the barn and got a halter and lead rope. She was screaming for help as she ran and ignored the loud noises coming from the objects hitting the floor. She got to Skar and slipped on the halter. She was pulling and crying and she didn't know if she could get up this time. She was looking at the ground, telling herself it was all her fault, when she heard it. A big release of breath and then the shuffling of hooves on dirt. She grabbed the mare's left foreleg and pulled and pushed. Soon enough Skar was standing. She looked sad and lifeless. Like she didn't want to be there anymore. Sarah hugged her friend that had been so close to death just seconds earlier. She knew she had a decision to make. To euthanize her and make her more peaceful and pain free, or to keep her alive and possibly never be able to ride or do anything with her again. The choice was easy. No matter what, Sarah would always be her owner, even if all she was good for was a pasture pet.
What do you think so far?

Nova 12-29-2009 12:25 PM

Really good.

I totally feel the same way Sara does about Skar.. I couldn't ever let something happen to my big boy :)

Write on! Its fabulous.

Icrazyaboutu 12-30-2009 01:33 PM

I'll write more later. Where do you think this should head? I was thinking her dad gets a new job so she has to moved to a city(New York City maybe?) Where the only stable was an old mans backyard and she meets another horse she falls in love with but it belongs to a weird teenage boy(her age or a bit older) then she starts talking to him and stops hanging out with Skar then something happens to Skar and she gets mad at the guy for taking up all her time then they start hanging out with their horses together? Idk, give me suggestions or tell me what I should change about this^

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