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horsea 06-07-2010 03:15 PM

Heart Broken... vent
Sorry, I just need to vent right now. My entire life, I've fallen in love with horses just to have them taken from me in some way:

1. Maggie (the first horse I rode(over 14.2hh)/ jumped/ showed) was sold.
2. Fireglow (Who I rode and spent hours with EVERYDAY) severed a tendon in his leg and will never be the same.
3. Butter was sold (Without me evening knowing, so I never got to say good bye)
4. Stratus was put down (Again without me knowing. I helped rescue this horse and spent many, many hours rehabilitating her)
5. Oak was put down (really bad colic) (My first western horse)
6. April was put down (because of laminitis)
7. Now...

Every horse I have ever become close to. This list is just from the past 6 years. And now, after I promised myself that I would never fall in love with a horse, I fell in love just to have him ripped out of my life. And there is nothing I can do about it. Maybe I should just give horses up for a while...

kmacdougall 06-07-2010 03:23 PM

I know it sucks but I really really really don't want you to quit! Have you ever heard the phrase "good things fall apart so better things can fall together"? Well each of these horses taught you something, came into your life, and changed you for the better. Please don't stop riding. Your horse in shining armour is coming :)

horsea 06-07-2010 03:30 PM

Awww, thank you. That's actually exactly what I needed to hear right now. I wouldn't be even close to where I am at now in my life without a single one of these horses, they are so special...

upnover 06-07-2010 03:41 PM

Ugh, i'm so sorry, sounds like you've had a really hard time! I can see why you're frustrated and sad. Unfortunately, saying goodbye is a natural part of life. Not just with horses, but other pets, people you love, etc. While it hurts, you can't shut off your heart from something you love. If you need time to mourn the loss of your horse, by all means make sure you take it. But I would really really encourage you to keep riding! It would be a shame to quit something that you truly love.

myhorsesonador 06-07-2010 03:48 PM

I know how you feel. I used to work for a broker. th 5 years that I was there I saw/ road over 500 horses. I fell in love with more than 100 and they would be sold off so another would come in. It was good for me though. I rode so meny horses and it really helped my riding. I won every show I went to. now I'm way out of shape Id be lucky to win any thing. :P

It really helps to just think about all the wounderful thinks they did for you. You never know what will happen! You may se them again one day. :)

horsea 06-07-2010 04:13 PM

Thank you guys so much, I'm feeling a bit better now

Jessabel 06-07-2010 07:50 PM

I know what you're going through. I just recently said goodbye to one of my favorite horses. Her owner moved her to another facility and I'm never going to see her again (long story). I had taken care of her over a period of five years and became very attached to her. It was like saying goodbye to one of my own horses, it just about did me in. That's why I try not to get emotionally involved with horses that don't belong to me, they can disappear right out from under you and there's nothing you can do about it.

I don't think you should give up. It really sucks to have to deal with what you're going through, but you'll love again and it'll be worth it. Things will get better for you. :wink:

darkwillow 06-07-2010 08:07 PM

My first pony, Acorn, was put down not long ago, at the age of 41. It broke my heart to see her go, but she was ready to go, and it have been unkind to keep her alive. I agree with kmacdougall, if Acorn hadn't had to go, I probably never would have found Isabelle. She taught me everything, but she also knew when it was time for me to move on.

It does hurt like hell when you have to let go of a horse you love so much, and it never really stops hurting, but it does get better. Loving another horse doesn't mean forgetting about the other horses, but finding a place in your heart for another horse.

You said one of the horses was one you rescued. The work you do is so important and helping horses towards a better life is one of the best things you can do. In the end, you might not have to worry about loving another horse, because sometimes they steal your heart and don't give you a choice. =)

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