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Jillibean6803 07-01-2010 02:58 AM

They say people dont pick their horses,but horses sure do pick their people...
And that right there is becoming more and more obvious for me. Ive wanted my very own pony since i was 5 yrs old. i tried begging, pleading, bargaining,pretty much anything to get my parents to 'pony up' the money for a horse.It was the one thing in my life i couldnt convince my parents i 'needed', though i did try, and try hard for 20 years.
Now that 20 yrs have passed since those people brought their little pony to my kindergarten class and we took pictures wearing red and white fake chaps and vest and cowboy hat,i officially own my own 'pony'. i cant get out of that state of mind. i dont care how big a horse is or what its breeding is, i call them all pony.
Harlow is not only my baby girl,my first pony,my love, my all, she is my friend, personal comedian, personal trainer, patience teacher and overall therapist. I stepped foot onto the ranch a few months back and kept getting drawn back to the quite tall, little bit rotund very dark bay mare with the funny lower lip. Honey was her name,but soon after i started handling her, i realized honey wasnt suitable for her personality.I searched my memory and the internet for a suitable name for the horse my close friend and i deemed to be quite the 'flirt' or tease to the boy horses,the one we've called a tramp,a hussy, etc. Randomly i got an email from my friend with the words, 'google the name jean harlow, harlow is her name, and you know it'
boy was she right. the original hollywood bombshell, prior to marilyn monroe, a flirt, tease, adorable and funny, used her looks to charm millions. well thats my pony in a nutshell.
she is not even green broke, however, she is broke to 'get on',but i dare you to saddle her and try to make her go somewhere. stubborn is her game, you put two stubborn beings together, well, its a perfect fit. I realized quickly that Harlow wasnt the kind of pony i could do a bit of ground work with and then saddle up and go, she needs more time,to trust, to learn (shes about 8-10 yrs old). She stands perfect for our farrier(however when I try to pick her hooves she throws a tissy, i think she's got a horsey crush on our farrier). If i step foot on that property without acknowledging her first and foremost i get ignored for quite some time. the owner of the ranch told me the other day that i have officially turned that mare into a diva, a horse that believes shes royalty and should be treated as such(ok maybe i did a little, i couldnt help it...). people laugh since i decided i was going to make sure my horse was a girly girl, so hot pink halter and matching lead rope, hot pink day mesh fly sheet, etc. when shes grubbin on treats or carrots, shes learning to 'eat like a lady'.
For a while, at least the past couple years, ive felt somewhat zombie inside. i would go through the motions but not really try to feel anything(traumatic loss in my life, followed by more reasons to feel apathetic towards life). Harlow changed that. I feel like a mother leaving her baby behind at a daycare while she goes off to work when i leave for the evening. she gives me that look, and will knicker to me as if saying ,'hey,i thought we were having a sleep over, why you leaving me?' and she knickers 'hey you! i missed you!' as soon as my car pulls in. Too sweet and too cute. she can read my energy, knows when ive had a crap day, and knows when im doing well. on my crap days, i turn her out in one of the arenas, and just sit on the mounting block. its not long before i have a giant pony face in my lap, or trying to nibble at my apparently hay flavored hair. when i look into her eyes(cheesy as it sounds) i hear the song 'no reins' by rascal flatts playing somehow. i see the wild spirit, soft heart and caring soul i have always been ashamed of in myself, but i see it in her, and its then that i know, i have a soul mate, in the form of a horse.she listens sometimes, other times she(like me growing up) has selective hearing. Ive almost peed myself watching her after she has been cooped up for a couple of days, when i turn her out, she does the run/buck/fart/whinny/shake her head/spaz move. its classic. and literally, i can be on the verge of crying due to a crap day, but i see that and i have tears of laughter in my eyes and have to sit for a minute because im laughing too hard to stand.
I may have been drawn to her that first day, but she definately did something with her eyes to draw me in.I look forward to each and every moment i get to be with her, be it teaching her manners etc, or just sitting or standing in a round pen hands on hips in frustration at life and having her come put her entire nose(up to her eyeballs) through the hole made by me having my hand on my hip. its like shes saying, 'awww cmon, give me lovin and youll feel better'
Harlow has the spirit of everything good in life, and likes to remind me of that. if im too mean(in her eyes that is), she will let me know. Shes never lied to me, always been her true self,and i believe i waited 20 yrs for the perfect horse for me.had i gotten a horse at an earlier age, it wouldnt be the same.Harlow found me, and i found her, and we're never letting go. i dont care if she decides she never wants to be ridden and just wants to be a spoiled princess, its unconditional love between her and i.(of course she wants to be ridden, i just have to convince her of that fact). Harlow, or Harlow bo Barlow, or whatever nickname comes to me that day, she's the child i never planned to have(i prefer fur and scoopable poo to baby vomit and diapers), but the longer i spend with her, the more i realize that whatever higher power is up there put this horse in my face for a reason. and as the song goes...
She left that loser in a dust cloud
Heart in his hand, chin on the ground
Cried her last tear for that clown

She can see a little clearer now
She said, "Oh, oh, I gotta go and find me"
Oh, oh she found the strength to break free

Like a painted wild mustang
Flyin' out across the open range
Finally gets to live her life that way
No fear, no fences, nobody-no reins

No reins
All she's ever felt is held back
She says, "It's kinda nice to hear myself laugh"
She's gonna do a lot more of that
She's makin' plans and makin' tracks
She said, "Oh, oh I gotta go and find me"
Oh, oh she found the strength to break free
Oh, oh she's learnin' how to let go
Oh, oh whichever way the wind blows
Oh, oh she's learnin' how to let go

No reins

its nice to feel free, able to laugh til i cry and finally get to live out my life my way

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