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dally 09-28-2010 08:01 PM

TB mare
OK, first, this is NOT a stolen horse. i sold her to a woman, thinking i was doing the right thing. i want some opinions on my subject as it is weird to me and the people i've talked about it.
i got my TB mare from a friend of my stepdad. she was working into racetrack, breeding horses and going back and forth between New York and Florida for races. anyhow, i was looking for a project horse and she told me about a gelding first. long story short, i ended up getting a small mare 15.3 hds, 4 years old, that was going to be put down if not sold rapidly. apparently she had some heart problem that made her loose every races and was no good to them anymore ( i know, some people kill me) anyway, i ended up getting her. i went back to basics training as she was apparently mistreated at the racetrack ( really spooky, scared of everything, pattern marks on her back legs...)
after 2 years of hard work, i needed to find a good home for her, i could not afford to keep her as i was moving out to college and had to pay for my own classes. i decided to find someone hopefully trustworthy, that would take good care of her, maybe continue her training, and keep in touch as i wanted to probably get her back when i would be financially OK.
well i thought i found the right person, turned out this person is being really weird. she said she lived out in Ocala, 1hour from Orlando, where i was moving to. i thought great, she will get used to forests and trail rides, have a nice home and i will be able to go see her. i talked about it with this girl and everythign was ok, she agreed and what i said.
first few weeks, she would answer my emails, after that, everything starting going wrong. she changed her phone number, email adress and apparently moved out. no news at all, i spent months looking for her just with her name and old phone number. lucky me, she sells a lot of things online, i got to found out her new adress and phone number, she was shocked the first time i called her, she would avoid the subject about my mare. the only info i got was that she moved out, could not afford horses, and gave my mare away to some friends that would use her for breeding, she would not tell me where her friends where located so i could go visit my mare. anyway, now im here, she obviously does not answer my calls anymore, nor my emails, i tried calling her with different numbers, she might have kept them all to dont answer.
few weeks ago, she friended me on facebook out of nowhere, and posted a picture of my mare with a baby. so i guess she wasnt lying afterall.
what i dont get is , why cant she tell me where my mare is? why can i just go visit her? how hard is it to jus give me the adress and phone number of the presume friends that bred my mare?

sorry for my long post, this is just really frustrating, i dont understand what is wrong with this woman! if my mare is healthy, with a foal and a nice home, why cant i go visit her??

leonalee 09-28-2010 08:53 PM

Aw - I'm truly sorry for your situation. Unfortunately, when you sell something and it no longer belongs to you you are left in a completely vulnerable, "no rights to it" situation. Perhaps the people that bought her aren't interested in having the horse's "baggage" coming with her and actually asked the girl to not disclose her location. They might think you will come out and be obnoxious and demanding and bossy, you know?Alternately, the girl who you sold her to could simply be respecting the privacy of these people and feels it is not her place to disclose their location/contact information. There is nothing wrong with this woman, necessarily.

I don't want to bash you at all, but from what you say as far as the lengths you went to trying to contact this girl, it sounds **at best** borderline overbearing. Perhaps if you back off and ask the girl if she'd be kind enough to contact the people and ask permission to forward their contact info, she'd consider it? At least the girl is letting you know how she is doing... it isn't her place to give you permission to go to someone else's house and it would be irresponsible to tell you "where" the horse you used to own ***read: not your mare*** is, in terms of privacy. Since you hunted her down, she might be afraid you are the kind of person who would just randomly show up on someone stranger's doorstep saying "Where is MY mare?"

I do wish you luck, but I bet your best bet would be to back off a little and not get so worked up!

dally 09-28-2010 09:05 PM

thanks for your opinion and i do understand what your saying. i have not try anything the last couple of months, so i did back off.
but, when i sold her, i clearly said i wanted to at least keep in touch, ok, not necessarly show up to someone doorstep asking for MY mare. i do know, i sold her and she is not mine anymore, i would just appreciate a little more keeping up. In 2 years, i got one picture and the little info about her changing owner. Thinking that the picture i got, was only few weeks,month ago? i was just scared she lied to me, and that my mare might be in really bad hands. So yes, the picture at least got me to think she might not be in bad hands afterall?
and it is true, now that she changed owner, they might not want me to visit, and i understand, some more infos would have been better though. or even tell me the new owners do not want to keep up, at least i would know for sure.
it is just the fact that she has been avoiding me, changing her info more than once, when she was completely different person when i met her.
anyway, thanks for your words

TeeBee 09-29-2010 10:39 PM

Aw dang. This thread has the same title as my post, and I thought there were replies in regards to my old TB mare. Got muh hopes up :( And hun, I understand. I miss my mare so terribly, sooo terribly, I wish I could just go visit her. Sometimes I think the person who has her doesn't respond to my posts on CL because she thinks I will hassle her into buying her back, but I really just wanna know how she's doing. :(

dally 09-29-2010 10:45 PM

Yes teebee, i totally understand :) same for me, i guess the person that has my mare might think im urging her cause i want to buy her back, but really, i cant financially do that, im in a new place in my life. i just want some news , i work so hard for her, she was my life, i put every penny i had for her. i just feel really left out.

i can understand if the girl think i want to buy her back, i learned from a friend who is part of the jockey club ( i gave her my mare's tattoo number) that my mare has excellent bloodlines. so i guess she thinks i want her back because of the bloodlines.

anyway, i hope you get some news too, you should post on other forums and places. if she has a tattoo, you should be able to retrieve some infos from somewhere

Sunny 09-29-2010 10:59 PM

I agree with Leonalee 100%. It's understandable that you miss her--but you don't have a right to the information you are requesting. I sold my mare and the new owner told me she'd send me pictures and update me all of the time. Did she? Ofcourse not. But i'm not hounding her down asking for pictures and information. I'm just hoping that she's in a good place with good people. What else can we do? You gave up EVERY and ALL rights to anything to do with the mare the instant you sold her. The second owner just sounds like a sane, sensible person. It's not right to give out someone else's contact information, so you can't be angry because she won't release it to you. Selling and losing horses is a part of the horse world, something we all deal with. Count your losses and move on. Happy trails.
Posted via Mobile Device

TeeBee 09-29-2010 11:20 PM

@Sunny - The mare(?) in your avatar looks EXACTLY like the mare I'm talking about. Go to my post and have a looksie! Is yours a TB?

Sunny 09-30-2010 08:08 AM

Yeah, she is. :D
Posted via Mobile Device

CheyGurl17 12-15-2010 07:52 PM

aww im sorry for u dally! see im lucky! i sold my mare to my old teacher, whos husband wanted her to breed. shes a really good looking horse and such. so i get updates all the time, and get to hear about both mom and baby since i still go to the same school. and i am allowed to go and see her whenever i want. i like it because, well im not attached to that horse, but she was my first horse, and really good with kids. i just like knowing that she is still doing her job teaching kids how to ride (my old teacher's little kids) and raising a family of her own! i can even go there and ride her if i want! and i totally see that this is NOT like most cases when you sell a horse! i just see too that you want a little comfort in knowing that you did what is right for the mare! after all, we all are trying to let our horses have a good life right? even if we sell them? good look and i hope that some day you can see that mare again!

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