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- - A: Please buy my pants! type of story :P (http://www.horseforum.com/jokes-funnies/please-buy-my-pants-type-story-74868/)
A: Please buy my pants! type of story :P
I was thinking about this the other day and I thought I would share it with you guys. Although I sort of felt bad for the lady, I can't help but laugh when I think of this event... it was sort of comical, to me anyhow. :wink:
It all happened 3 years ago. I was in grade 7 (13) and it was spring. I was going to start lessons for the first time in the summer when school was finally out. I was even more horse crazy then, then I am now, :lol: and spent lots of time looking at riding gear because my sister was going to buy me some as a bday gift.
One day my mom was walking and she bumped into a neighbor that lives down our street. They started to talk and my mom said how in the summer I was going to try some riding lessons, and despite of her slight worry she was happy I would have an activity to keep me busy that year. (We'll call my neighbor: XX)
Well XX then brought up how her daughter when she was my age (15-20 yrs ago) took riding lessons at this nice posh barn and she still has these really nice breeches she bought her when after 2-3 years of riding, she decided to show. She said she could bring them over and I could try them on. When my mom told me this I was really happy because if they fit, it would be one less thing to get.
So XX calls one day and says she can bring them over in the afternoon. It was a Saturday and my sister's boyfriend, my sister, my other sister and my dad were all outside talking on the porch.
When XX came, I was soo excited and she talked for a bit saying how they were very good quality breeches, she spent a lot of money for them, and her daughter only wore them 2-3 times... etc etc... posh posh company... etc.
FInally she gave me the bag and told me to go try them. Away I go skipping to my room like a happy little Bambi and ... hahahaha, sorry I can't help but laugh, but oh dear I was so... speechless when I unzipped the bag. They looked nothing like the nice breeches I saw in the catalog. (which are tight and hug your thighs)... these... well I tried them on and for one, it was a little too big around the waist. Second, too long ( I was stepping on them), as well as super tight around my ankles... and well the picture below is how they looked, except they were beige and for some reaosn in my memory they looked even more ridiculous. :wink:
Hahaha I remember looking like a clown. If they fit properly, they probably look a looooooot better, but they were too long and too big and I wish so bad now that I had taken a picture of myself. The reflection of myself in my mirror is but a blur now.
SO I go out and my mom is just starring at me, incredulous. (I don't blame her, not only did I look funny but XX had just finished telling her she would sell them to us for a super good price... only for 170$)
This is pretty much our conversation from there:
XX: aw you look wonderful in them dear! You look so professional.
Me being polite: They're nice, (smile) but a little big ( I show the inch between me and the pants when i pull).
mom: They ARE a little too big for her... how ab...
XX: Oh but she'll grow, she;s still so young. I was just telling your mother here how I would sell them to you for a very good price. They are a very, very expensive company, and I payed over 300$ for them 10 years ago, (she said only 10, but it had to be more because her daughter is like 30-35 and if she rode at 14-15, (that's the age she said at least later on), then it had to be 15-20 yrs ago... maybe not 20 but at least 15 more or less (maybe a little less...). Anywho.
My mom wasn't convinced at all and was showing it, she had nor the money, and even less the sense to buy them for me.
XX though (and I don't blame her, she spent so much on them that I no wonder she wanted to sell them so badly), was pushing it. She really wanted us to buy them and kept talking away how I had to look the part and I couldn't go not dressed properly and that these were such nice quality breeches. She even bent down and asked my mom to join her and told her to look at the stitching, how refined and what quality it was! That you would never see an undone stitch on these pants.
And then, the priceless moment: XX briefly looked at me and asked me if I minded (I barely had time to say not at all, until I realized she was actually UNZIPPING the zipper to show the inside stitching.
Ooooh goodness how EMBARRASSED i WAS, standing there staring at her as she unzipped :shock: my pants and stood 5 inches away from my flowered underwear. The pants were too big, so as they were unzipped they were slipping off and I was practically standing with my pants falling off my butt! hahahaha I still don't understand how I can laugh at myself in such humiliation. :lol: You can imagine how fast I zipped up those pants as soon as the stopped holding the pants so tight. She must have been nervous because I swear she was gripping on to those pants as if they would save her life. :shock:
After that I was still polite but I decided to... sort of revenge... and as she continued to say I had to look the part (she repeated this at least 7 times). One of her examples: Just like in soccer, I couldn't go to a match without cleats, or people wouldn't take me seriously. etc...
So, as I said, I "got back at her" and told her how in my riding catalog, they had good breeches that had the latest technology (absorbing blabla, comfy...) for 80-100, or even juts simple breeches for 40-50$!
She seemed so uncomfortable after I told her that and she just kept saying how well I had to look the part, quality, quality, they cost me 300$!
Finally she told me to go show them to my dad and when I went outside oh boy my sisters were cracking up when I told them: yes, yes I know I look like a clown, or even better a hunter (they did look like those pants hunters wore a in Africa/India a long time ago). My dad barely looked at them before he said he wouldn't give a penny for those ridiculous pants.
When I got back, XX asked how my father liked them and if he thought I looked like a profesionnal in them... achem, of course I answered.
My mom finally got XX to leave when she said she had errands to run and well, she took the pants with her and no, I never bought them. :wink: When closing the door behind her she told me that if my parenst wouldn't get them for me, and if I was really attached to them (achem) then myabe i could babysit and pay them myself. Yaaa, well I was already babysitting and putting every penny away for riding lessons, but I didn't say anything.
Though the other day I saw her and she told me she still had the pants if I still wanted them. Hehe, it brought back all these memories.
Oh and my sister ended up buying me a kit that cost her 130 (taxes and shipping), it had breeches, paddock boots, chaps, gloves, a crop and a helmet. And I still use and have everything today, except for my helmet. I happily updated that one last Christmas. :wink:
Hahaha well good for you for reading all of this! Hope you got a little bit of entertainment with my story! :D
hehe this is how they looked like, but they seemed even worse in real life and they were beige.
Thank you. I am glad you enjoyed it. :)
Bwahahahaha!!! Those pants look so rediculous!!! I'm glad you didn't buy them! Thanks for sharing the story.
Thanks for reading! Ya my mother was telling me how the poor women must be crazy to think that she would let me wear such a ridiculous pair of pants in public. ;) It's moment like this in your life that actually make it interesting. :)
I wish my life had funny and marking moments like it used to. Everything now is so... bllahh. :)
PLease? more people read my story? Took me so long to write and I was hoping more then 2 people woudl enjoy it. ;)
Those are older style riding breeches. They were all the rage for a very long time. In fact, some folks still ride in that style. The sleeker breeches are a fairly new introduction.
I'm sure the woman paid a lot of money for them, especially if they were custom made. I don't really see this as being a hilarious story; it's actually kind of sad.
I have to agree with SR. Those breeches are not silly, they were very fashionable. Many of the more traditional riding situations (mounted police, etc) still wear that style of breeches.
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