Low confidence after accident - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 33 Old 08-10-2011, 08:07 AM Thread Starter
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Know what you mean. My husband is an excellent rider and can't understand this fear. He remembers how I enjoyed it. I had a long chat to him Sunday trying to explain how I feel but he still thinks I'm taking it too slow. It so nice to talk to somebody that understands this fear. When you talk to another horsey person most of them don't understand and outsiders just say "Stop riding". I believe we will get there again, but at this stage another fall will be the end of riding for me. One little step at a time.
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post #12 of 33 Old 08-10-2011, 10:04 AM
Green Broke
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I just found this article recently, it's fairly helpful:
Face Your Riding Fears from Horse&Rider | EquiSearch

"My treasures do not clink together or glitter; They gleam in the sun and neigh in the night."
-Arabian Proverb
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post #13 of 33 Old 08-10-2011, 10:41 AM Thread Starter
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Printed it and can't wait to read it. Thanks
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post #14 of 33 Old 08-10-2011, 07:24 PM
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thanks Spookychick13! Read the article, and bookmarked it. Will get back to working it out starting next week. I know I know, no time like the present, but...My daughter is getting married this Friday, soo I am little busy right now.
So when the wedding is over with and things settle back into their routine around here, I am devoting myself to my horse and hopefully we will be enjoying some great fall trail riding weather! Thanks again it looks like its just what the doc ordered! Just wish we were all close together and we could work on this face to face with each other, it would be sooooo much better!
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post #15 of 33 Old 08-10-2011, 08:33 PM
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Rafica and Gypsy.. you both are doing wonderfully and yeah don't let people tell you what to do to ride your horse. If you aren't feeling it, then it is not time yet!!!


Hugs and support to both of you :)
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post #16 of 33 Old 08-15-2011, 07:49 AM Thread Starter
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Weekend update.

On Friday afternoon I went for a long outride with CC. That was only the second time I went on an outride with him. I feel safer in an arena environment. He tends to be very difficult on his way back and my husband likes to give him free reins, so the race horse in him takes over and they both enjoy it. I have been worried he will run away with me. On Friday a couple of new riders went out and I knew that there wont be any funny business. I was worried because he is not a herd type that just stays with the rest, he wants to be in the front and do his own thing. I managed to handle him without too much effort. Had to make a couple of short turns to keep him in but overall went okay.

On Saturday I went on another outride, accompanied by my husband and daughter. As my daughter is still very small I knew it will be a slow ride. CC however did not like the slow walking again. I arranged that mu husband will stay with daughter and that I could go ahead, do some trotting. At first I was a bit anxious as I knew that he could easily run away as we were returning, he was alone and it was feeding time. He however behaved like an angel and we had a nice trot home. My husband even commented that we looked very relaxed and that I looked calmer than he's seen me since the accident. I really enjoyed it and feels a bit more confident.

Can't wait to go riding again on Wednesday.
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post #17 of 33 Old 08-15-2011, 12:14 PM
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I am so happy that things worked well for you! Nothing like a great ride to help build the confidence levels up.
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post #18 of 33 Old 08-18-2011, 11:42 PM
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I developed some confidence issues about 6 years ago after a fall. It takes a long time to get your nerve back. I does make you a bit more cautious, but I don't think that is a bad thing. I found two things a great help when riding a horse I don't know or don't trust. Have a ground crew. Have a person on the ground who can walk along side of you and the horse with a lead at first if necessary. As you start to feel comfortable, your ground person can back off. Another help it to ride the horse in question while it is ponied from a horse it gets along well with. Both of these things will help your confidence as well as that of your horse.

I hope this helps.
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post #19 of 33 Old 08-19-2011, 01:10 AM
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I'm dealing with a similar loss of confidence.

I was rodeo bucked off another boarder's mare while trying to be nice and help the boarder try out her horse for the first time. I wouldn't have gotten up on the mare, except I was told that she was broke and had tons of rides on her, she just hadn't been ridden in a while. I climbed up on her after we weighted the saddle (and she didn't flinch) and as I was leaning down to catch my right stirrup, she crow hopped on me. No big deal, I've ridden worse. Apparently it pissed her off that I didn't come off because she pinned her ears, whipped her head around and full-on rodeo bucked me. I flipped over her right shoulder and landed on first my butt, then my back, then my head. First time in two years I wasn't wearing a helmet and I was seeing stars. According to my friend (who was in the round pen with us), the mare went nearly vertical when she bucked, came down on her side, rolled over the saddle, scrambled up, and then, without even pausing to shake off the dust, came after me with both front feet as I lay on the ground, dazed. Turns out the mare had NEVER had ANYONE on her back before I climbed up there, according to our BO.

I severely sprained my ankle (my left foot tangled in the stirrup as I came off), was in a splint for a week because the ER thought I hairline fractured my tibia (turned out to be the shadow of a bone spur that made it appear to be a hairline fracture), and in a walking cast for two weeks.

I thought I was gonna be fine getting back up on another horse. I was bucked off (my fault) when I was younger and was back riding the next day. No problems. So, I eagerly climbed up on my greenbroke two-year-old who I've been waiting for two months to ride. All of a sudden, I was a nervous, shaking train wreck. If he flinched, I started to panic. Today, we went on a ride around the neighborhood (his first ride off-property) and, while he did great for a green-as-grass horse, I didn't do so well. I finally realized that I was not in a good state to ride after he spooked once (it wasn't even a real spook...he flinched when a dog started barking and trotted to catch up with the other horses), "bolted" (trotting) after the other horses when he thought he was being left behind, and flinched when my friend reprimanded her mare and her mare got all pissy, so I dismounted and walked the entire two miles home leading my horse. It totally wasn't him. It was me.

Before that mare threw me, is "spook-and-trot" that he did after the dog startled him would have been absolutely no big deal. Today, I actually shrieked and did everything wrong (sat forward, pulled up on the reins, shoved my toes down)...until the trainer (who was riding with us...can't call her "my" trainer, since all she did was ride my horse the first few times he was under saddle...I don't take lessons with her, though) called out "Sit back!" That snapped me back to reality and I was my old, calm self again and got him under control. It's like my brain completely shuts down when something "scary" (that isn't really scary) happens.

My friend, who boards at the same barn I do, doesn't get it. She's never been thrown from a horse and her confidence "issues" were all because she had her stirrups too long (she was extremely uncomfortable at the canter). The trainer looks at me like I'm a horrible rider and shouldn't be on a horse. But this nervous, scared, panicky person ISN'T me! I rode one of the dude string horses when I first started boarding at this barn (first time on a horse in almost a year) and we went on a trail ride. My stirrups were too long (couldn't shorten them, or they would have been too short), which made me uncomfortable, but I rode Reno's random trots to catch up to my friend's mare with no problems, rode his wading through a bush at random with only mild angst, and even rode out his MAJOR spook coming off the highway on our way back because a motorcyclist got too close and revved his engine and flashed his lights at us...all with absolutely no problems or fear.

Sorry...this got really long...but I'm just so frustrated and I really don't have anyone to talk to about it who is understanding and won't just say "Get over it."

Do not tell me I can't...because I will show you that I can.
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post #20 of 33 Old 08-19-2011, 03:49 AM Thread Starter
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Well DraftyAiresMum you are in the right place. Here we understand exactly how you feel. I have been riding for 20 years, had a couple of falls, but always just got back on - no problem. And then it struck me, this fear, this thing in my head that just says "I don't want to get hurt anymore". But my love for the horses won't let me stop riding. One small step at a time, thats what I've learned. Don't worry what the people say, if you don't feel confident to canter you don't, if you don't feel confident to jump, you don't. But in the same time you can't get totally stuck on say walking, you have to push yourself to take the next step, trotting. Take it slow but go forward, don't stagnate at one place. We can do it.
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