01-17-2011, 08:22 AM
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Hi guys just an update - (just wanted to say before I start rambling that your comments and advice are very helpful to me please do keep advising ) - had another lesson today. I've been taking bach flower remedies for my nerves and anxiousness since Friday, now i'm skeptical as to whether it will or won't work but when we set out today I did actually feel alot more relaxed and actually allowed my horse to step out more freely without getting scared that the pace would pick up. Result I felt! Then we headed onto the road and I must say in the past the road and traffic have been my strong point. Well a white van came up behind me and to me I felt relaxed and calm, obviously I was aware it was there but I didn't feel anything building up inside me or my breathing getting shallow, anyway didn't he spook at the van behind us! Leaped into the road and did a couple of strides in trot nothing major and I have to say i'm getting quite used to it now. Now I know that this horse is as steady as they come in traffic so I know that it had to be down to me sending him nervous signals. My question is how could I have kept myself calm and confident when I didn't realise I wasn't? To me I was as confident on the road as I had been previously. My instructor is great and she is really helping me through this difficult time and I know that once my confidence does get better my riding will come on heaps. Just feels crappy when my confidence is stopping me doing something that I actually love doing and when I know it's me sending signals to the horse it's really frustrating. The spooking has only just started happening this past 2 weeks after he slipped on some wet grass when we were starting to trot and my confidence and nerves took a severe beating.