Relationship advice on Horse Forum!? - Page 7 - The Horse Forum
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post #61 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 07:56 AM
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Marriage (In my opinion) is when two people (a man and a women) become one.

That being said - I understand there are other types of unions that are also called marriage (same sex couples) but in that, it's still couples and they are still pledging to be faithful to each other. They are still uniting, marrying, whatever - for love. I get that some people have different relationship views where they don't look at sex in the same way. It's seen as a recreational kind of thing and not as being intimate with ones partner.

What I don't understand is the marriage of convenience. Marrying for money or housing or stability seems off. It doesn't seem fair to either person and I personally find that idea as offensive becuase it go's against my beliefs which are just as important as those of others. Marriage should not be taken lightly and I think - by reading through these threads... Marriage is not the correct option for the OP or for the boyfriend. Staying together also seems pretty unfair to the boyfriend because he is not getting anything in return. He's paying for everything and the sex thing is confusing. At one point you say when you want to kiss him he says bad timing but then you say that you have no sexual interest in him so I wonder, are you only wanting to get intimate when he is at the end of his rope? Seems unfair.

"Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I love you
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post #62 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 09:50 AM
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Originally Posted by aubie View Post
He has the view most men do. The fiancť does not like being cucked. Most men don't and would have been gone .
This is a harsh truth. I'm very non-judgmental. You do you.

BUT.

I've known many, many people who were in open relationships, claimed to be polyamorous. That's well and good.

They always acted superior to people in a monogamous relationship btw. I always just smiled and nodded.

Out of the many people I know who stated that's who they are, not one of them are happy. All of their marriages ended in a catastrophic and messy divorce... because Humans are territorial. Sooner or later someone (Usually the male when we're talking about a hetero marriage) always ends up very unhappy and resentful and then things blow sky high. I've seen it. I've seen it. I've seen it.

OP: I'm not judging you. I am not. That's not who I am - but you need to step back from him, and you need to truly look deep into yourself and decide if this is 'for real' or if it's a phase. If it's really you, and you come to this conclusion after a LOT of introspection and soul searching, you're going to have to find someone who not only verbally says it's okay, but someone truly okay with it. And that person, in my experience, is a unicorn. That's not him. He sounds deeply resentful and festering about this and it's 'leaking out' if you will.




PS



I don't mean hook up with an actual unicorn... that would be weird. And it is universally known that unicorns are jerks

"We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that death will tremble to take us."
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post #63 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 03:23 PM
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I don't mean hook up with an actual unicorn... that would be weird. And it is universally known that unicorns are jerks

I hate to break this news, but unicorns don't exist. Now if you had used Pegasus Although often misused in popular culture, the term "Pegasus" is a proper noun, referring to a particular character, whereas the term "pterippus" (plural: "pterippi") is the generic name for the species of winged horses. Pegasus is usually depicted as pure white in color. Pegasus is a child of the Olympian god Poseidon. He was foaled by the Gorgon Medusa upon her death, when the hero Perseus decapitated her. Pegasus is the brother of Chrysaor and the uncle of Geryon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pegasus

So we know roughly when he was born, his father, mother, brother and his nephew.

I am concerned for the security of our great Nation; not so much because of any threat from without, but because of the insidious forces working from within. Douglas MacArthur
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post #64 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 03:29 PM
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Originally Posted by RegalCharm View Post
I hate to break this news, but unicorns don't exist. Now if you had used Pegasus Although often misused in popular culture, the term "Pegasus" is a proper noun, referring to a particular character, whereas the term "pterippus" (plural: "pterippi") is the generic name for the species of winged horses. Pegasus is usually depicted as pure white in color. Pegasus is a child of the Olympian god Poseidon. He was foaled by the Gorgon Medusa upon her death, when the hero Perseus decapitated her. Pegasus is the brother of Chrysaor and the uncle of Geryon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pegasus

So we know roughly when he was born, his father, mother, brother and his nephew.

Ahhhh A fellow mythology nerd! Well met sir, well met!

"We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that death will tremble to take us."
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post #65 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 06:16 PM
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Originally Posted by RegalCharm View Post
I hate to break this news, but unicorns don't exist. Now if you had used Pegasus Although often misused in popular culture, the term "Pegasus" is a proper noun, referring to a particular character, whereas the term "pterippus" (plural: "pterippi") is the generic name for the species of winged horses. Pegasus is usually depicted as pure white in color. Pegasus is a child of the Olympian god Poseidon. He was foaled by the Gorgon Medusa upon her death, when the hero Perseus decapitated her. Pegasus is the brother of Chrysaor and the uncle of Geryon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pegasus

So we know roughly when he was born, his father, mother, brother and his nephew.
Wait. The god of water.. had sex with the snake headed lady... and they had a Pegasus?

Good Golly Man! Must you blow my mind on EVERY thread?!

PS.... I used to love reading these types of stories...

"Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I love you
Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin knees get lazy
And love like crazy"
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post #66 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 06:21 PM
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Originally Posted by farmpony84 View Post
Wait. The god of water.. had sex with the snake headed lady... and they had a Pegasus?

Good Golly Man! Must you blow my mind on EVERY thread?!

PS.... I used to love reading these types of stories...
Remember when they used to make SENSE? I mean, I used to didn't blink an eye at Sleipnir's parentage. LOL

I mean... Now I see Tom Hiddleston as Loki in my head and yeah. It gets really weird from there on....

"We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that death will tremble to take us."
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post #67 of 71 Old 01-04-2019, 09:52 PM
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Originally Posted by AtokaGhosthorse View Post
Remember when they used to make SENSE? I mean, I used to didn't blink an eye at Sleipnir's parentage. LOL

I mean... Now I see Tom Hiddleston as Loki in my head and yeah. It gets really weird from there on....
That would make history if Hiddleston birthed an 8 legged foal.
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I am concerned for the security of our great Nation; not so much because of any threat from without, but because of the insidious forces working from within. Douglas MacArthur
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post #68 of 71 Old 01-06-2019, 09:29 AM
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Quote:

And a PS: I'm saddened that there is still this gut reaction idea, in 2019, that the person staying at home is necessarily sponging off the income earner, and that this is necessarily their prime motivation for being in that relationship. This might be the case for a minority of people, but just to assume that automatically is actually really disrespectful, and generally factually incorrect. Usually, in single-income households, the other person is working as many, if not more, hours than the income earner, for their mutual good - they just don't get paid for it (I can pull up the Australian statistics on this if anyone wants them). And, if the income earner were to have to formally employ someone to do all the housekeeping, shopping, gardening, cooking and organising that the at-home person does, they usually couldn't afford that level of service.
My comment regarding OP staying for financial gain was a response to her saying that she didn't want to leave because she had no job and couldn't afford to. Also, she has no sexual interest in her "fiance". Keeping in mind we are not really getting an objective description of the relationship since it is a one sided perspective, it is very possible that what is described as "abuse" by her is a reaction of a frustrated person who feels betrayed. It appears the fiance is NOT polyamorous, that she may have met him on a gaming site and maybe the open relationship thing was OK for 4 1/2 years. But at the point of engagement to be married, it appears he was committed to the relationship and she is not. Pretty easy for me to see, at least, that they both need to walk away.
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post #69 of 71 Old 01-07-2019, 12:57 AM
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So now we get to the real reason. He's the meal ticket. Doesn't seem fair to me to use the guy now and then when you are somehow more financially capable, to leave since he's no longer want you wanted in the first place. Seen it happen too many times before, usually after a little kid in tow to be the one who suffers.



And thanks to the SuperModerator for explaining about that little bug running around under my screen. Remembered after sleeping on it that I'd seen it about a year ago (was thinking does it always come up right after a New Year?), had worried about it, stayed off HF for awhile, hadn't seen it in a long time and now find out that you've put it there to keep us alert. Almost like an April Fool's joke, maybe. What a relief to hear that explanation!
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post #70 of 71 Old Today, 02:46 AM Thread Starter
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It has been almost a year since this post. Thought I'd let you all know that I broke up with this partner. I couldn't deal any more. He had many opportunities to change but he didnt.


Now I am with a lovely man who is everything I could want in a partner. Except...he doesn't ride horses :( lol I will train him.

Eventual breeder of fine horses
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