Can't have staff interacting with boarders? Do the staff have to bow to the boarders too? What an archaic attitude! When I was a child/teen I had to work at the barns to help pay for my horses' keep, and that was half a century ago!
Around here if boarders don't help out around the place, they are asked to move...
I actually am boarding for the first time ever, and it's not full board which I actually like because I like doing barn chores. I think if you're paying for a service at a barn then you should get the service you pay for. My BO feeds morning and night. He makes sure that the auto waterers are functioning properly and checks on them for us. That's it.
I do ask my BO questions as he did have horses for over sixty years and is a wealth of information. Plus, he's older and I get the feeling he's lonely so we chat from time to time.
I would tell the BO at the OP's barn that I want the services I pay for, nothing more and nothing less. Particularly the input of the BO on what to do with MY horse.
to ride on a horse, is to fly without wings