How I got my hooman mom (by Teddy, a horse) - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 4 Old 01-08-2020, 05:07 PM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Sep 2018
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How I got my hooman mom (by Teddy, a horse)

Chapter One

Hi, my name is Teddy, and I am a horse. Well, I heard people saying I have ďpapersĒ that make me half pony, but I donít see how paper could make me a pony. I am in a herd with a pony, and I think it is size and personality that make you a pony. I am small, but I am not that small. And I do not have a pony personality. Ponies like to do whatever they want to do, and not follow rules. I keep telling him that rules are for following, but he just shakes his head at me.

I live in a herd with a this pony (his name is Gallego but everyone just calls him Pony) and Moonshine. Moonshine is the most amazing horse in the whole world. She is big, and calm, and quiet, and nothing makes her afraid, and she is very grumpy. She is our leader. I am the boss, but she is the leader. I hope that makes sense.

Anyway, Moonshine told me she has a ďjournalĒ where she write about what she does. I donít know if I have anything that interesting to say about what I do, but I do have a story to tell you. Itís about how I came to be with my hooman mom.

By the way, Pony says that she is a hooman but she canít be my mom, because she is not a horse. I keep telling him I KNOW she is not a horse, and Iím not saying she is my REAL mom, but she is my HOOMAN mom. He doesnít understand. He says she is just a hooman, although a good one.

Iím sorry, I get distracted a lot when Iím telling stories. I think of one thing, and then it makes me think of something else, and then I think of something else, and then I forget where I was. I hope it doesnít make you mad.

The time before my hooman mom came was different. I even had a different name. I donít like to think about that time. A lot of people tried to make me do things, and then when I didnít understand, they yelled at me, and hit me with a whip, and kicked me. But that just made me worry, and then I couldnít understand anything. I can get so full of worries that I canít see or hear or even think any more, and the only thing is my brain is that I HAVE TO GET AWAY RIGHT NOW.

Do you know what a Worry is? Moonshine and Gallego say that they canít see worries, so they donít exist. But **I** can see them, so I know they are real. They are little creatures about three feet tall, that are greenish or grayish, and the worst part is THEY DONíT HAVE NOSES! They are not always there. They only appear when bad things happen, or might be about to happen. For instance, that scary wheeled box thing they call a ďtrailerĒ is full of them, so I donít want to go in there. Worries can go inside of you and then really bad things happen. Thatís when all you can think of is escaping, even if there is a hooman telling you to do something else.

Also a long time ago there werenít even any hoomans, or any other horses. I donít remember my real mother. I know that I lived by myself for a long time, with not even any hoomans. I was hungry a lot. I donít know which was worse, being alone and hungry, or being yelled at because I didnít understand things.

But like I said, that was Before. Back when I had a different name. The story I want to tell you is how my hooman mom found me and became my mom.
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post #2 of 4 Old 01-10-2020, 09:02 AM Thread Starter
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Chapter Two

So, after the Bad Times there were some times when I was only back in the pasture. This was different from when I was alone before, this time I was with my friends. So it was OK. But sometimes a hooman would come and get me. I didnít like them to get me, because I thought they wanted to ride me, and that would mean being yelled at. But sometimes they brought me to see the farrier. I didnít like that either. You see, I have this thing in my shoulder where I canít lift up my left front leg very much. But no one ever saw that. They just said I was bad. The farrier would try to crank my leg up and then get mad because I couldnít. He yelled at me. Then he would crank harder and harder, and keep yelling, and the Worries started crowding in, and I did things that I know were very bad, but I just had to GET AWAY! And then everyone yelled at me more and hit me and told me I was Bad. So you can understand why, when a hooman came to get me, I would run away.

One day another hooman came to get me. It was my hooman mom, but I didnít know that then. I knew who she was, because she had two other horses and sometimes she would come and get them and ride them, and sometimes she would just come out and sit and watch everyone, or give scratches. But this time she came for ME!

So of course I ran away. I mean, I didnít really run, because she wasnít exactly chasing me, but I maintained a Personal Space Bubble of about 30 feet. She figured this out pretty quickly, and then she stopped walking after me. But she didnít exactly go away either. She just stood there. After a while, she stopped looking at me too. So that was good. But I noticed that while I was grazing, and walking, she didnít get any farther away. In fact, it seemed like somehow maybe she was getting slowly closer. I donít know how she did that. It seemed OK at first, I guess, but when she got within about ten feet of me, I started worrying again.

But then she made herself smaller! She made herself very small! And she very slowly came toward me, and then I realized she had cookies. I like cookies of course, I mean who doesnít, but also I know that hoomans use them to catch horses, and I didnít want to be caught. So I stopped grazing and kept a wary eye on her. She didnít get any closer for a while, but then she got even smaller (!) and got close enough to me that she could hold out her hands for me to eat the cookies. I figured, if she was so small, then maybe I could eat the cookies, so I quickly did, then got out of there. She didnít follow me, she just turned around and went back to the barn. That was weird. But I guess I was right about small people not being too bad.

The next day she came out again. She wasnít small this time, but since I sort of knew her, I let her get within about ten feet before I started walking away. But she did that thing again, where she followed me without moving (I think it had something to do with, she only took a step when I did, on the exact same foot, maybe). After a while I decided to just stop. She stopped too, then got small and came over to me. I wasnít worried. I took the cookies. She said ďgood boyĒ and left.

The third day, I didnít walk away from her. I wasnít too worried, and I knew she had cookies. She brought them to me, fed me, and touched me very briefly on my shoulder, then she left.

That went on for a few days, and then she came out with a halter and lead rope. Ah-ha, I thought, I know where this is going, but on the other hand she hadnít done anything bad to me before, and she had cookies, so I didnít run away. She didnít even put it on me! Just fed me the cookies, petted me for a minute, then left. She came out with the halter and lead rope again the next day, and this time she DID put it on, but she gave me cookies, then took it off, then gave me more cookies, then left. This was definitely a strange hooman!

She didnít come every day, but she came a lot, maybe for a month, before she ever asked me to come Inside. Inside is where the arenas are, and the farrier, and the yelling. But by this time I sort of trusted her, so I went with her even though I didnít really want to. Plus, I really really want to be a Good Boy, but when people yell at you, you know you are not a Good Boy. But she never ever yelled at me. So I thought maybe I could be a Good Boy for her, and one thing that Good Boys do is follow hoomans on a lead rope, even if they maybe arenít sure they want to go to where the hooman is going. She brought me in then gave me some alfalfa hay (!), told me I was a good boy, then took me back out again. I wasnít entirely sure what had just happened. But it wasnít bad. I did something I didnít really want to do, because she asked, and it really wasnít too bad! I got told I was a Good Boy! And I got alfalfa hay! I love alfalfa hay!
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post #3 of 4 Old 01-14-2020, 11:35 AM Thread Starter
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Chapter Three


I hope you donít mind, but I would like to talk about what I believe and some other things that I think.

I believe that there is right and wrong, good and bad. I believe that rules are for following. I believe that hoomans are for obeying. I believe that rails are for being next to and poles are for going over. I believe that if you do the right thing, then no one will yell at you. Maybe they will even say ďGood Boy Teddy!Ē But I also believe that if you do the wrong thing, people will get mad at you and bad things will happen. And I believe that if a hooman asks you to do something but you donít understand what to do, the best thing is to do nothing, because maybe then they wonít yell at you. I donít like being yelled at. It makes the Worries come up.

I believe that Moonshine is the queen of the pasture and the best horse in the whole world, ever. Donít tell my hooman mom, but I love Moonshine more than I love her. I mean, of course I do Ė Moonshine is a horse! And sheís so smart! And calm! And brave! Nothing bothers Moonshine, and when Moonshine is there the Worries canít come close. Also Moonshine is grumpy, which is a good quality in a mare. She pins her ears at me sometimes, but I know she doesnít mean it.

I like it when everyone is nice. I am the boss in our herd, but I am very nice to Moonshine and Gallego. Especially Moonshine. Because Gallego chases her away from her hay sometimes. When that happens, I tell Gallego, ďNo, stop that!Ē and I protect Moonshine. Gallego says that when a horse is the boss of another horse, they can take the other horseís hay whenever they want, but I donít think that is very nice. And Moonshine tells me that she is very hungry, almost starving, all the time, so of course I share with her. I donít need so much hay myself.

I like it best when my hooman mom says ďGood Boy Teddy.Ē She has a special ďGood Boy TeddyĒ voice that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and even melty, and I know that everything will be OK!

I believe that if something bad happens, it is probably my fault. I believe that if I try harder, maybe it wonít happen next time. I try very hard.

I like it when things stay the same. When things change, then maybe it means the rules have changed, and rules shouldnít change. Rules should always be the same. Otherwise how could they be rules?

I like food that is sweet. Gallego and Moonshine say thatís weird that I eat hooman food, but I like it! Foods that I like are cake, cupcakes (yum!), cookies, scones, and cream puffs! I love the way icing tastes, but I donít like the way it feels in my mouth (squishy!) so I like to eat sweet food that has some icing and some not icing parts. Of course I also like horse cookies. Oh, and pasta. I mean, hooman pasta. Iím not sure if there is horse pasta or not. Also just the other day I had something called an Apple Pie Croissant, and it was so good!

That is some things about me. I am not good at telling stories, so I just put them in there so you would know something about how I think.
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post #4 of 4 Old 01-16-2020, 05:30 PM Thread Starter
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Chapter Four

When I am Worried, I toss my head. I used to toss my head all of the time. Even out in the pasture, I would toss my head sometimes if I was far away from the other horses and I wanted to be closer. I know I could have just walked over to where they were, but I tossed my head first because I was Worried. I donít know why I do this, maybe it keeps some of the Worries away? Worries crowd in when bad things happen, or when you think they might happen.

So I tossed my head a lot back then. Like I said, even in the pasture. But also in the stall, when tied, in an arena, when being held still, and lots of other times. Looking back on it, itís hard to believe that I used to be worried about being in a stall. Stalls are where I get fed now! Also, at our new place, I have a stall of my very own! It says ďTeddyĒ on it, and it is across the aisle from Gallegoís and Moonshineís stalls, so I can see them both all of the time and not get worried. I used to not like this stall, or any other stall, because I felt trapped. What if something happened, and the Worries got me?

My hooman mom got me used to being in a stall by always feeding me there! She would give me alfalfa hay (yum!) and also my yummy food. Also she would groom me and pick my hooves, and act like everything was just normal. But she wouldnít make me stay in for very long. I think each time she made me stay in a little longer, but I didnít really notice. She also left the door open most of the time, so I knew I could escape if the Worries came!

I was OK with being in a stall but I didnít ever really like it (I live in a pasture all of the time, but my hooman mom brings me in to feed me and ride me, and she has to have somewhere to put me when she does those things). Until one day something happened. That morning started out sort of normal, but there was something different in the air, and I started seeing Worries hiding behind things. So I knew something bad was going to happen. Then lots of people came, way more than usual. And then there was a terrible crash! Gallego jumped up and started running in circles in his stall, even though itís so tiny (I think thatís what started to believe that his stall is haunted, but thatís a whole other subject). Then lots of booming sounds. And then, there were other new horses there! And lots and lots of people! Moonshine said it was a horse show, and she was going to be in it, doing dressage, which I think means going in circles in a pretty way.

Anyway, my hooman mom wanted to try to get me used to this show. So she took me out and walked me around. I did not like it! Everything was different! And there were ropes and signs saying ďno horsesĒ in places, and a loudspeaker, and so many people! She made me walk around and see everything. Then she took me back to my stall and fed me some more hay. We couldnít go out in our pasture because it was being used for parking! Then she walked around, and fed me again. Then after a while she came to get me out again, and I said NO. I will not go back out into that place that is my home but different now, with different people and different horses. I refused! Because do you know what, I realized that my stall wasnít TRAPPING me, it was PROTECTING me! Protecting me from strangers and new things being in my home. So I stayed in there the rest of the day, and now I like my stall!

Also, for that show, I made up a chant for Moonshine: ďMoonshine is the best; better than the rest!Ē She liked it! She said ďGood job, Teddy.Ē Usually she just tells me Iím being silly when I come up with things like that, so I know I must have done a good job. And Moonshine won! She really is the best! She got a blue ribbon to prove it!

Oops, I got ahead of myself, a lot. I wanted to talk about what else made me toss my head. Another big thing was the arena. Because a lot of bad things had happened in there, like people yelling (especially my old owner), my rider being really worried and then me being worried, and being whipped because I didnít understand things. I didnít want to go in there at all. My hooman mom took me in and asked me to stand, and I just started tossing my head. She gave me some cookies (which I almost didnít even want, I just wanted to leave so bad!) and then we left. She didnít understand back then that I didnít like to stand still when I was nervous.

The next time we went in the arena, she asked me to stay a little longer, and gave me some more cookies, then a little more the next time. I think somehow then she realized that I didnít like being still, so she started walking me around in there, which was a lot better. Then she got out some poles and we walked over those, and that was good, too. I like poles because they are a question that I know the answer to! When you see a pole you know you need to go over it! Soon she wasnít giving me any cookies in there at all, but I didnít mind. I liked going over the poles, and she told me ďGood boy, Teddy!Ē in her Good Boy Teddy voice, and that made me feel very good and also safe.

You will probably not be surprised that I did not like to stand still at the mounting block. But my hooman mom brought me there and fed me, and also gave me cookies. At that time, I didnít have a bridle with a bit because my teeth hurt all the time, too much to have a bit in my mouth. So it didnít hurt me to stand there with my non-bitted bridle and eat. Now I have a bit, and I like that better, because it is more clear what my hooman mom is asking me to do. I like directions that are clear. But on the other hand, unlike some horses, I canít eat with a bit in my mouth, or even drink really, so we donít do treats at the mounting block any more, which is too bad! Wouldnít it be nice to start your ride off by having a nice cupcake?

She also worked on me being tied by grooming me, tacking me, and of course feeding me while I was tied. As long as she or Moonshine was around, I didnít mind being tied. Or if I was thinking about something else, like food! But even now I still donít like it. But I can stand for longer times now. I am getting better!

Next chapter: riding!
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