As an adult, do your parents still make you so mad you could just spit *rant* - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 11:27 AM Thread Starter
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My husband did bring up one point on the subject. When I was in third grade, my dad bought me my first horse. Of course he was an over the road truck driver, so even though I tried my best to take care of her, my mom was the one who had to haul buckets of water, buy the feed, and pay for vet expenses. They got divorced when I was 12. So, she probably equals any horse to bad times in her life.
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post #12 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 11:33 AM
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You will always be her baby, and she will always feel the need to guide you.
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post #13 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 11:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dlpark2 View Post
My husband did bring up one point on the subject. When I was in third grade, my dad bought me my first horse. Of course he was an over the road truck driver, so even though I tried my best to take care of her, my mom was the one who had to haul buckets of water, buy the feed, and pay for vet expenses. They got divorced when I was 12. So, she probably equals any horse to bad times in her life.
Very possible. Not everyone likes to carry water buckets and such. I wouldn't worry about it. As long as it makes you happy that's all that matters. Moms will be Moms.

This is what happens when you have democrats in office
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post #14 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 12:19 PM
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"As an adult, do your parents still make you so mad you could just spit *rant*"

Well, not now that my parents are both dead. My Dad was killed in Vietnam when I was 14, and my Mom died when I was about 50.

Did my Mom continue to drive me nuts at times? Yes, but not NEARLY as often as my kids continue to...or my grandkids!

Do my 26 & 30 year old kids get ****ed at Dad? Yep. Do I drive my 15 year old daughter nuts? Yep. Unlike the average politician or pastor, my family is very imperfect, including me...
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post #15 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 12:27 PM
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I can deal with them not approving of my life. The constant telling my kids that I'm a rotten mother for not raising them the way I was (forced religion but only in the "do as I say, not as I do" and pretending that none of their 6 kids actually existed unless something was going to make THEM look good) not so much.

We live many states away and for he most part, I try and keep my kids from having much contact with them. No good comes from telling your grandkids how much better their OTHER grandkids are and how their cousins would NEVER get dirty like mine. No, their parents bought some mansion in the middle of an extremely poor area so they can lord it over everyone there and hire people for pennies to do all the housework, yardwork and so forth. My BIL was bragging about how he paid a group of 3 teens $10 TOTAL to mow, edge and weed his 3 acre lawn! What a jerk!!

Last edited by Lockwood; 03-22-2013 at 12:32 PM.
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post #16 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 01:01 PM
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Oh yes! Just my mom. My dad and I are both very easy going. :P
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post #17 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 01:51 PM
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YES my mother is the exact same way. She loves to remind me that she doesn't think I should own horses.
My sister lives with me and one time I was talking to my mom on the phone about some issues with my sister blowing through her money and not getting her bills payed. Somehow my mom felt like that was a good time to tell me AGAIN "You know, I know you don't want to hear this, but you really don't need horses ". Funny, I wasn't aware we were talking about me.
She also speeks very condescendingly about my horses if there's ever a schedule conflict due to needing to take care of the horses first, as if only the things that are important in HER life matter. Ok I might have some mommy issues.

I do love my in laws though. They may not think it's a good idea either, but they always make a point to ask me how my horses are doing and never see it as their place to make negative comments. My husband and I have been married for 9 years and if that's a decision we made, his parents respect that.
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post #18 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 02:09 PM
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My dad was the horse-aholic in the family and that's where I'm sure I got my love for them. But I didn't actually get my own until in my late 30's early 40's. By then he was gone - but I have photos of him with his horses when he was young. I like to think I'm carrying on that tradtion. I can remember a few times as a youngster coming home from riding at a friend's and mother yelling at me to immediately get a bath and leave my stinky clothes outside! Before I even got in the door! Of course, there were lots of other little things that were irritating at the time. My mother likes to look these days, but doesn't like to be near them and just asks how they're doing. She's in a nursing home now with Alzheimer's dementia but comes to stay a couple weekends a month and when we drive into the yard, she always looks for my equine friend. Yep, Parents CAN be a pain - I'm sure I was when my girls started riding. But I now know it was out of love I said and did what I did. Just remember to hang in there and try to make good memories with them because some day YOU'll be the parent and your kids will just "love" all you do!. Sorry, didn't mean to lecture. Been there, done that, got the wrinkles and gray hair instead of the t-shirt to prove it.
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post #19 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 02:56 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by mtndrmr View Post
My dad was the horse-aholic in the family and that's where I'm sure I got my love for them. But I didn't actually get my own until in my late 30's early 40's. By then he was gone - but I have photos of him with his horses when he was young. I like to think I'm carrying on that tradtion. I can remember a few times as a youngster coming home from riding at a friend's and mother yelling at me to immediately get a bath and leave my stinky clothes outside! Before I even got in the door! Of course, there were lots of other little things that were irritating at the time. My mother likes to look these days, but doesn't like to be near them and just asks how they're doing. She's in a nursing home now with Alzheimer's dementia but comes to stay a couple weekends a month and when we drive into the yard, she always looks for my equine friend. Yep, Parents CAN be a pain - I'm sure I was when my girls started riding. But I now know it was out of love I said and did what I did. Just remember to hang in there and try to make good memories with them because some day YOU'll be the parent and your kids will just "love" all you do!. Sorry, didn't mean to lecture. Been there, done that, got the wrinkles and gray hair instead of the t-shirt to prove it.
I am a parent now, and I try my best to respect my children's decisions and guide them down the right path. There have been times though that I have said something and then rethought and said that wasn't me that was my mother. I love her and have fond memories of times we have had together, but sometimes I just wish she would keep her opinions to herself.
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post #20 of 28 Old 03-22-2013, 03:08 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Whisper22 View Post
YES my mother is the exact same way. She loves to remind me that she doesn't think I should own horses.
My sister lives with me and one time I was talking to my mom on the phone about some issues with my sister blowing through her money and not getting her bills payed. Somehow my mom felt like that was a good time to tell me AGAIN "You know, I know you don't want to hear this, but you really don't need horses ". Funny, I wasn't aware we were talking about me.
She also speeks very condescendingly about my horses if there's ever a schedule conflict due to needing to take care of the horses first, as if only the things that are important in HER life matter. Ok I might have some mommy issues.

I do love my in laws though. They may not think it's a good idea either, but they always make a point to ask me how my horses are doing and never see it as their place to make negative comments. My husband and I have been married for 9 years and if that's a decision we made, his parents respect that.
Yep that is my mom, and then when I ask her for her opinion, she will sit there and say, "well, I don't want to interfer. Your old enough to make your own decisions." Like last year, we visited them and my husband's parents in PA. My husband and I went to highschool together, so our parents live in the same area. We considered moving back to PA and asked my mom's opinion since we realized that her and my husband's parents could use our help and she didn't want to give it when we asked her for it.
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