Daughter That Thinks She's Better Than Everyone Else? - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
 77Likes
Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #11 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 06:50 PM
Banned
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 2,469
• Horses: 3
Quote:
However, I do not believe in punishing children,
Congratulations. YOU have created this monster by not providing enforceable boundaries for a growing youngster. YOU failed to teach your child there are consequences for bad behavior. If you are REALLY lucky, she won't end up in prison, but just spend the rest of her life being miserable and making those around her miserable as well.
smrobs, haviris, HagonNag and 9 others like this.
squirrelfood is offline  
post #12 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 06:55 PM
Banned
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 728
• Horses: 0
Quote:
Originally Posted by squirrelfood View Post
Congratulations. YOU have created this monster by not providing enforceable boundaries for a growing youngster. YOU failed to teach your child there are consequences for bad behavior. If you are REALLY lucky, she won't end up in prison, but just spend the rest of her life being miserable and making those around her miserable as well.
We both certainly agree on this one!
Tazzie and NBEventer like this.
BugZapper89 is offline  
post #13 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 06:55 PM
Trained
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 6,289
• Horses: 0
At age 17, I think the cat is already out of the bag, so it speak. This is something that should have been fixed when she was very young. Now, she's pretty much set in her personality.

There's a lot of stupid out there!
trailhorserider is offline  
post #14 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 06:55 PM
Yearling
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: State of Confusion (SC)
Posts: 890
• Horses: 3
The time to mold a child is when he/she is young. When your daughter is 17 you're coming to the party WAY too late. I'd look for some counseling for yourself because you are going to need it. You're going to have to face the fact that your child rearing beliefs helped to make her the way she is and you'll have to realize that at this point in her life there is very little you can do to influence her. You're going to have to learn to live with whatever she becomes. We reap what we sow.
haviris, Tazzie, JCnGrace and 1 others like this.

I'm not a complete idiot--there are parts missing!

What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.
HagonNag is offline  
post #15 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 07:07 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 584
• Horses: 0
There isn't much I can say I've never had to deal with personality disorders and sounds like something for trained professionals to help you with. We can offer support as you try to get through this but we can't parent for you.

As far as the punishment thing goes, my parents never "punished" us either, at least in the way you guys are talking about (spanking, grounding, taking away our stuff), but the disposition of all the kids in my family is to mouth off, NOT physical harm or throw a tantrum/scream. Once my brother accidentally broke our nanny's glasses when he was mad (running around or something I don't remember) so my mom made him pay for new ones (it was like $200 and he wasn't even 10) you can bet he made sure to never break someone else's stuff again, on accident or on purpose, but that is because his "punishment" made sense, it was logical and the "real world" consequences for his actions.
smrobs and squirrelfood like this.

"I don't think he ever gave a thought to other people's opinions, which was just as well because they were often unkind."
-- James Herriot, All Creatures Great and Small
DreaMy is offline  
post #16 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 07:07 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Italy
Posts: 508
• Horses: 1
Quote:
Originally Posted by WesternRidingCowgirl View Post
If I even TRY to punish her, she freaks out. She'll run away, slit her wrists, or threaten (or possibly even try) to attack me. Besides, I don't believe in punishment anyway.
Ok, now I'll say something very harsh.

If she threatens to harm herself, or if she actually does it, send her for some time to a mental health center that deals with suicidal teens (I'm sure that there is one around).

Yeah they are not nice places, but there they will make sure that she won't be a danger to herself or others, and she should get the idea that it's not the healthy way to behave.
Cielo Notturno is offline  
post #17 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 07:08 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 737
• Horses: 0
To me this is a huge no brainer "She has put herself, her horse, and other riders and their horses in danger to be the best and win in the show ring." If this were my daughter she would not be showing horses anymore. To put yourself in danger is one thing, it is entirely another to put the other competitors and animals in danger. It's simply not ok and wouldn't be tolerated in my house.

Last edited by Lockwood; 09-14-2014 at 07:25 PM.
tinaev is offline  
post #18 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 07:12 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Italy
Posts: 508
• Horses: 1
Anyway, I don't believe that 17 is too late to teach her something. She still has a lot of growing to do. Just let her behavior have consequences. As DreaMy said, logical, real-world consequences. Don't reward tantrums.
Chasin Ponies likes this.
Cielo Notturno is offline  
post #19 of 19 Old 09-14-2014, 07:21 PM
Showing
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: PA
Posts: 10,742
• Horses: 3
Closed for moderator review.
MyFillyAspen and DreaMy like this.
Lockwood is offline  
Closed Thread

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the The Horse Forum forums, you must first register.

Already have a Horse Forum account?
Members are allowed only one account per person at the Horse Forum, so if you've made an account here in the past you'll need to continue using that account. Please do not create a new account or you may lose access to the Horse Forum. If you need help recovering your existing account, please Contact Us. We'll be glad to help!

New to the Horse Forum?
Please choose a username you will be satisfied with using for the duration of your membership at the Horse Forum. We do not change members' usernames upon request because that would make it difficult for everyone to keep track of who is who on the forum. For that reason, please do not incorporate your horse's name into your username so that you are not stuck with a username related to a horse you may no longer have some day, or use any other username you may no longer identify with or care for in the future.



User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Old Thread Warning
This thread is more than 90 days old. When a thread is this old, it is often better to start a new thread rather than post to it. However, If you feel you have something of value to add to this particular thread, you can do so by checking the box below before submitting your post.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
New Gelding thinks everything is out to get him lbw0912 Trail Riding 49 12-23-2013 09:47 AM
My TB thinks he's a QH... Reno Bay Horse Talk 12 10-28-2012 11:48 PM
He thinks/ She thinks. tinyliny Jokes and Funnies 5 04-25-2012 06:36 PM
She thinks she's a bunny Domino13011 Horse Pictures 14 09-04-2011 09:16 PM
Is he actually correct or just thinks he knows everything? Gidget Horse Tack and Equipment 16 07-25-2010 03:51 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome