I Want Out...I Guess? - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 19 Old 08-17-2010, 11:59 PM
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Totally agree with everything said, really great advice.
Hang in there!
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post #12 of 19 Old 08-18-2010, 04:19 AM
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One thing, you have the perfect horse for the changes you're going through; if she was challenging you, it'd be so much easier to get out of horses. Can you appreciate what a good girl she is, & then maybe that'll rekindle your love for her/horses in general?
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post #13 of 19 Old 08-18-2010, 10:08 AM Thread Starter
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I do appreciate her, which is partly why I keep telling myself I'm not good enough and she needs/deserves a real horseman. She's challenging in the saddle but never on the ground, so in a way I guess I am glad she's lame and not able to work, because that's all riding was becoming: unenjoyable, difficult, trying, work. And then of course, when my instructor gets on her she goes fine..well, better than she did for me, which makes me feel even worse. I've gone through phases like this, but never this bad.


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post #14 of 19 Old 08-18-2010, 11:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ilyTango View Post
I do appreciate her, which is partly why I keep telling myself I'm not good enough and she needs/deserves a real horseman. She's challenging in the saddle but never on the ground, so in a way I guess I am glad she's lame and not able to work, because that's all riding was becoming: unenjoyable, difficult, trying, work. And then of course, when my instructor gets on her she goes fine..well, better than she did for me, which makes me feel even worse. I've gone through phases like this, but never this bad.
I know how frustrating that is...watching someone else do something perfectly that you couldn't do. I was that person for the first couple years of riding, and now I would consider myself that person that watches others get on my horse and...how do I put it, fail! Once you become more comfortable, know how to ask your horse to do certain things, etc. you will be that person that can ask your horse for anything and they'll respond. Just hold in there
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post #15 of 19 Old 08-18-2010, 03:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mliponoga View Post
I was that person for the first couple years of riding, and now I would consider myself that person that watches others get on my horse and...how do I put it, fail! Once you become more comfortable, know how to ask your horse to do certain things, etc. you will be that person that can ask your horse for anything and they'll respond. Just hold in there
lol i'm the same way. My parents bought my horse in 2000 so I was about 11 at the time. He definitely made riding challenging, frustrating, discouraging...(shall I go on? ) But over the years we've gotten to know each other really well and know how to work together. And he's the kind that is awesome on the ground-I can lead him anywhere with lil kids in the saddle and he's an angel. But he certainly gives you a run for your money once you're on him. So he's not the most popular with my friends that come over to ride.
Hang in there hun. We're all here for you.

The aim of art is to represent not the outward appearance of things, but their inward significance. ~Aristotle
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post #16 of 19 Old 08-18-2010, 03:58 PM
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I agree with whats been said, just hang in there. There are always things you want to give up in life, but you have to go through the lows to get the highs.

As for the bond, if I crouch down and brush my mares front legs, I can guarantee she will try and headbutt me to push me over. Thats not love, but thats the way she is.

I think your being a bit hard on yourself in all honesty. Everyone has weaknesses they need to work on, just try not to focus on them too much and remember you have strengths too. Chin up and keep going
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post #17 of 19 Old 08-20-2010, 02:34 PM Thread Starter
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X| AHGJFHSAI! It's so frustrating being so incompetent! I genuinely don't know if my leading abilities are weak, or that she's just testing me -a lot- and being silly because she's still relatively young (6). I guess it doesn't help that she's confined to stall rest and is going a bit loopy (well, loopy in Tango's sense) from being shut in all day, but what kind of a horseman am I if my horse is only well-behaved when she's in a good mood? She's not blatantly or aggressively being a little sh*t, and I think most of it has to do with her being sick of staying in and penning up her energy, but..I just don't feel like I'm the leader here, though I try to be.

Like, just this morning we were walking up by the road, and a gravel truck and a dirtbike passed, and the only reason she didn't bolt was because I pulled her in to face me and stayed calm...she was pretty freaked out though. This is Tango we're talking about. If it had been Tiffany or something (the trainer who broke her) handling her, she never would have been scared. Tiffany has rodeher near racing dirtbikes and four-wheelers and Tango didn't even bat an eye...it's just annoying..

But thanks everyone anyways for your..well-wishes =)


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post #18 of 19 Old 08-20-2010, 03:04 PM
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Originally Posted by wild_spot View Post
I don't think a bond is an amazing emotional connection. My idea of an actually acheivable bond is knowing each other inside and out so that your interaction becomes second nature. That's what I ahve/had with Wildey - but again, he is perfectly happy without me at the moment too!
That's what I have with my 23-yr old. My family's had him since before I was born, and I know him inside out. I understand and anticipate his reactions before he himself knows he's going to react in a certain way, I can ride him bridleless because I can trust he will not spook, and if he did, that he would listen to me, and I could know how to stop it. If we meet something on the trails (like a dirtbike) I know EXACTLY how he'll react to it and can adjust and comfort him in ways that only I can, because I know what he needs. It's second nature to give him an extra nudge and turn his nose inward at the arena gate because I know he wants to stop there. I KNOW him.

Do we have some majikal bond? Lol. Maybe if such a thing existed, then yes. But lilTango, you do not need to have something like that with every horse. Arthur's the only horse I understand like that, and it's a "bond" out of respect, trust, and status symbols. He's a naturally dominant horse, but he KNOWS I'm the leader and what I say goes. He's come to accept it, so he listens.

Keep riding....there will be times when you'll need a horse of your own to comfort and support you, even if only you know he's supporting you.
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post #19 of 19 Old 08-22-2010, 09:18 PM
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I just want to add this one little bit of advice.
You dont have to be better or worse than any other horseperson that you look up to. You just have to be the best horseperson for you and your horse. Dont try to be what anyone else is. Be yourself. Do your best. It will all fall into place.


Cocoa - 32 yr old QH, Cherokee - 8 yr old TWH & Toby - 16 yr old QH
R.I.P. Cocoa 4/13/78 - 2/9/11
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