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post #11 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 09:51 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 25,930
• Horses: 7
I remember I got so mad at Pistol one summer. I couldn't ride him! I had him at this place that had massive pastures. I think the smallest one was about 50 acres. I could barely catch him and then when I did, there was no riding arena so I had to ride him in the same pasture he was turned out in. Some horses will let you do that, others... will not. He would rear everytime I tried to mount and then he'd spin away from me and rip his reigns from my hands.

One day I tried to take him on trail. I got on no problem but then I had to get off because I couldn't get the gate closed from his back and there were cows in the pasture. So I got off and shut the gate and then he would rear every time I went to put my foot in the stirrup. Finally he reared and spun and yanked the reins right out of my hands. He took off through the woods. I looked for him for an hour. Finally I called my then boyfriend (now husband) and told him to come find my horse and then I was selling him. He was GONE. DONE. BAD PONY!

He found my horse and brought him back (he had jumped a fence and was in a neighboring pasture with their horses). He even got on him and walked around on his back. Then he actually fed him for a month or so because I was done. It was one of those "I spend all my money on him! (which was true because I only made $5 per hour at the time) and I give him all my love. I spend all my time on him and I love him so much and he gives me this in return!" moments.

That was probably 15 years ago. I still have Pistol and he's still a jerk but I love him. We've been together for almost 23 years now. He'll be 26 this month.

I know it's not really the same as what you are going through but the point is, I'd have been so sorry had I gotten out of horses. A break is much better. And maybe a change of scenery/people....

"Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I love you
Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin knees get lazy
And love like crazy"
farmpony84 is offline  
post #12 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 10:22 PM
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Spotsylvania, VA
Posts: 1,083
• Horses: 2
Kevin and farmpony said it all. Wendy was JUST where you are now. Please don't let a few ding dongs make you give up something you love whole-heartedly. THEY'RE NOT WORTH IT!!!!! You may be able to find decent homes for your babies. But will they give them the love and take care of them like you do??? I was out of horses for close to 5 years. Everyday, I thought about the 2 that I had to sell because of moving to where I am now. My husband saw it to the point that he actually bought me a horse. My Rosie IS my sanity. When I'm with her, there's nobody and nothing else that matters. The rest of the world disappears. Even when I'm stressed and biting everybody else's head off, I'm nice and calm with her because I know it's unconditional love. The only kind that you get with a horse.

Step back, take a deep breath, and listen to what some of the wise horse people have said to you in this thread. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't do something you will most likely regret. You have lots of people on here that care about you and will be a sounding board if you need to rant about something or share something that is good. This is not the end of the road! There actually IS a light at the end of the tunnel! It may be faint and dim right now, but you're already well on your way. Don't give up!

I will keep you in my prayers.
charlicata is offline  
post #13 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 10:56 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: N. Indiana
Posts: 892
• Horses: 3
Thanks everyone. It's not just a whim that's caused this.

I have moved my horses, but I feel bad because it's $1100 a month to board there and as good a job as my husband makes it's not the kind of $$ we can put out. Especially while I can't train or give lessons. It was obviously free while I had my barn and before that I was at a co-op so that was even cheaper. Can't go back to that barn because the BO sees me as competition.

It breaks my heart. I have waited many, many years for a horse like Buzz. I've never had a connection with a horse like I do with him.

Then I add a recent phonecall I had with a professional that used to come out to the horses when I was at the barn. She sounded quite umm.. cautious.. when she spoke to me. Which only served to embarrass me further. I wish I could see to the point where this whole nasty time is behind me. I thought after the first couple of days that it would be ok. It'd be ok. But as each day passes with no job prospects (not for lack of trying) I'm just at a loss.

I'm in Indiana, though I do have a good horse friend in PA. I wish I lived there and not here lol.
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post #14 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 11:01 PM
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Spotsylvania, VA
Posts: 1,083
• Horses: 2
Hmmmmm...sounds like a good time to move!!!
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post #15 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 11:07 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: N. Indiana
Posts: 892
• Horses: 3
Originally Posted by charlicata View Post
Hmmmmm...sounds like a good time to move!!!
I wish! My husband is military and we can't move that easily.
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post #16 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 11:11 PM
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Central Pa
Posts: 639
• Horses: 2
Leave hubby there for now, load up the horses, and get your butt here! I've got a barn with stalls, and an extra bedroom. You give me lessons, and I'll take care of the rest :) You sent me a bridle and a girth so that I wouldn't give up. Do I need to send it back to keep you from doing the same?? You were an angel to me through all of this, and I WILL NOT let you give up. Where there's a will, there is definitely a way.
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post #17 of 31 Old 03-03-2010, 11:22 PM
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Ontario
Posts: 6,176
• Horses: 5
I don't think I know the whole story here. I have read some of it from another thread, so if I'm way out of whack, I apologize in advance.

Sounds to me like you have more than just a love of horses going on; a business as well, or at the very least a hobby that supports itself.

The facts of business are: that you will always have somebody that badmouths you and you will always find people that believe the bigmouth. You will also have clients that love you, clients that can see through the gossip and clients that need some time to sort out in their heads what really has gone on and who to trust. This will not correct itself in a "few days" as you say.

The facts of competition are: some business people can sleep at night no matter what they do and they will make a living. Some people need to follow a good ethic to be able to sleep at night; they will make a living too, but the rewards may not be as high financially in the short term. Which one are you? You need to know yourself, so you know what kind of business decisions you make.

The customer that did call you and was cautious? Well, she DID call you, right? I mean, RIGHT? That was your opportunity to be sane and solid and offer your very best promotional campaign for YOUR services and why YOU are good. Never mind being vengeful on the gossiper; that would not get you anywhere. I actually just had a client today tell me that she absolutely would not work with my predescessor and she said, "I'm sure I'm not the only client that feels that way." It was an open door invitation for me to badmouth my predescessor, but I didn't. This client asked a couple more times how many other people don't like her, but I refused to comment, though I absolutely agree and there are many others that feel the same way. If my client is happy with me, that is what counts. I don't want to be chosen because "the other guy is no good." I want to be chosen because I AM good.

So, if you are done with horses, fine. Doesn't mean it has to be forever. If you are done with training, fine. But look closely at your reasoning and decision you have made, will make and want to make. Will this same thing happen again in another business? Absolutely. You can't be a businessman if you can't take the lows with the highs. It's the game.

Good luck with whatever you decide.
NorthernMama is offline  
post #18 of 31 Old 03-04-2010, 08:49 AM
Green Broke
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 4,260
• Horses: 15
Sell two of the horses and use the cash from them to keep Buzz?
ShutUpJoe is offline  
post #19 of 31 Old 03-04-2010, 08:51 AM
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: In a land far far away, or so I wish.
Posts: 12,825
• Horses: 0
Why not simply go from a trainer/instructor back to being just a horse owner like so many of us?

Sell a couple of horses and keep one for you to train and enjoy for yourself.

Then, in a few years, if the bug to train/instruct comes back you will not be totally out of the loop and you will have enjoyed the companionship of your horse all that time as a bonus.
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post #20 of 31 Old 03-04-2010, 02:13 PM
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,227
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^ I agree. Sell a few and keep Buzz! Nobody wants to see you sell your boy and regret it.

I give myself very good advice, But I very seldom follow it
Gillian is offline  

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