I'm Sorry... WHAT?!?! - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 12 Old 06-29-2010, 06:37 PM Thread Starter
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Angry I'm Sorry... WHAT?!?!

So, as you may know, about two months ago we bought my horse. Well, about a month into my ownership with him, a girl I met two years ago in a horse camp called my up and asked me if she could lease him. Now, I've seen this girl ride before, and she flops all over the place, and yanks on the reins, and kicks the horse in the ribs. So, obviously, I said no. Well, Then she told me that I "wasn't taking good enough care of him, I mean, you're only out at the barn, like, twice a week, right?" Uh, wrong. I'm out there at least every other day.

So, you might be asking why I'm posting this if it happened so long ago. Well, here's where it gets interesting. I told my instructor about what happened, and she said "Oh, don't worry. That girl stalks every new horse owner for a few weeks after they get their horse." What? So, I asked around, and sure enough, a few of the other boarders had this problem too. Well, it doesn't end there. Every time I see this girl, she asks me if she can lease my horse, or take a "practice ride" on him, or ride him in a show, or groom him, or take hm for a walk, or hose him off. NO! NO YOU CAN NOT!

Anyways, I told her to stay away from my horse, and if I ever see her touching him, or in his stall when I haven't given her permission, I will tell the barn manager and have her do something about it.

Sorry about the vent. Do you think I handled the situation well?
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post #2 of 12 Old 06-29-2010, 06:40 PM
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Yes, you handled the situation correctly.

People like that have problems with personal boundaries, and you need to set them straight firmly and with no wiggle room for them to even think they can get around your rules.

Your horse, your rules. Period.
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post #3 of 12 Old 06-29-2010, 06:42 PM
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I think so! Jeeze I woulda punched her out! And thats really weird for someone to do... like I can understand her wanting to always being around horses and to help out with them but that is REALLY creepy!
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post #4 of 12 Old 06-29-2010, 06:44 PM Thread Starter
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Okay, good. I was hoping that I wasn't too harsh on her... I don't like being mean, I just wanted to get my point across.
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post #5 of 12 Old 06-29-2010, 06:50 PM
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Oh dear. Does the girl have a horse herself? Why is she present at the barn?
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post #6 of 12 Old 06-29-2010, 06:51 PM Thread Starter
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The girl rides the lesson horses at the barn. She takes a lesson twice a week I think and works at summer camp.
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post #7 of 12 Old 06-30-2010, 02:36 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AngelWithoutWings54 View Post
So, as you may know, about two months ago we bought my horse. Well, about a month into my ownership with him, a girl I met two years ago in a horse camp called my up and asked me if she could lease him. Now, I've seen this girl ride before, and she flops all over the place, and yanks on the reins, and kicks the horse in the ribs. So, obviously, I said no. Well, Then she told me that I "wasn't taking good enough care of him, I mean, you're only out at the barn, like, twice a week, right?" Uh, wrong. I'm out there at least every other day.

So, you might be asking why I'm posting this if it happened so long ago. Well, here's where it gets interesting. I told my instructor about what happened, and she said "Oh, don't worry. That girl stalks every new horse owner for a few weeks after they get their horse." What? So, I asked around, and sure enough, a few of the other boarders had this problem too. Well, it doesn't end there. Every time I see this girl, she asks me if she can lease my horse, or take a "practice ride" on him, or ride him in a show, or groom him, or take hm for a walk, or hose him off. NO! NO YOU CAN NOT!

Anyways, I told her to stay away from my horse, and if I ever see her touching him, or in his stall when I haven't given her permission, I will tell the barn manager and have her do something about it.

Sorry about the vent. Do you think I handled the situation well?
Yes, you handled it correctly... To an extent. Hard to tell without knowing the girl and what she meant by it.

If your feeling unsure about it talk it over with her and tell her to put herself in your shoes.

Possibly give her some other ideas for her to get hands on time with horses. Maybe she could watch you ride, or help you clean tack, or the stall...Something to make her feel like she can do something, but tell her this is an important time for you and your new horse to bond and get to know each other.

Maybe you could offer to help her pick a horse to lease...?

She may just be a rude girl pushing boundaries, or she may want to learn and enjoy horses too.

Heck, if I didn't "stalk" horsey people I wouldn't be where I am today in the horse world.

"On the 6th day God created horses; and on the 7th day He painted the good ones"
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post #8 of 12 Old 06-30-2010, 04:58 AM
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That sounds like a girl I used to know. She was coming to the barn telling my trainer/barn owner I said she could take my horse out. My trainer was much smarter and said "well let me just call and ask to make sure". When I found out I told her the barn owners had my word to call the police should she try to handle my horse without my permission and that a new security system would be going up shortly so that any after hours visits wouldn't go unnoticed.
Needless to say I haven't heard from her since. That was last year.

I hope things go well with you and this girl. Sounds eerily similar to an extent. If you have any issues at all talk to whoever is in charge of the grounds and hopefully they'll take care of it.

When life gives you lemons....chuck em at whoever is giving them to you!
I don't want lemons! I want cookies!
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post #9 of 12 Old 06-30-2010, 05:04 AM
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yeah i think you said the right thing, if your BO said that she does this to every new horse owner then all you need to do is wait until another horse arrives to board... :)

Keep your feet on the ground when your head's in the clouds.
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post #10 of 12 Old 06-30-2010, 07:23 PM
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Jeez... What a rude little brat. It's not even like she NEVER gets to be around horses, since she takes lessons and works at a summer camp. That's just creepy. You did the right thing. I'd be pretty irked too if someone did that to me.

"A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is ultimately to be at peace with himself.
What a man can be, he must be.
" Abraham Maslow, 1968
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