Thanks guys I'm glad I was right.
We've been working on our dressage for about two years sporadically.
I've been quite excited recently (before the lesson) to find her reaching for the rein. I've been focusing whilst hacking out on maintaining a nice steady contact and keeping her jaw soft. She's got the forwards out amd about to help too. I'm finding she's actually rounding up nicely for a few strides at a time, I can feel her mouth but there's no pressure. When I drop the rein I'm often finding she stretches down onto the contact again.
From a horse who hated any contact a while ago I'm happy with that considering how sporadically I've been working on it.
This to me sounds better then keeping the nose down with a flapping rein.