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Pet vs Pat

6K views 37 replies 25 participants last post by  AtokaGhosthorse 
#1 · (Edited)
So, I was kind of wondering pet vs pat.

I never pat my horse - I pet, so I was wondering about those who do.

When some people physically praise their horse by patting, does their horse actually like that? I mean, it doesn't really seem as "normal" (I know, everything we do with horses isn't "normal") compared to petting (or stroking or scratching).

I know that some sensitive horses don't really like it, and that others can become desensitized/ignore/tolerate it, but do they actually learn to like/enjoy it over petting as physical praise? If so, how can you tell they actually like it rather than simply being "used to it"?

I also know that some horses simply don't like any physical praise, so that's not really what I asking.
 
#2 ·
Here is a funny thing I heard once and paying attention to it I think it’s true in my experience. I heard rubbing a horse is praising him and patting a horse is praising oneself. Now, if I pay a lot of attention to myself I do notice that my feelings are in line with that statement. Watching other people I notice it too.
 
#6 ·
Some people tend to get carried away and slap the horse's neck as a "praise". I'll pat gently, but it's usually a rub or scratch. That's what horses would do to each other when they groom.
If I manhandled my mare's face like a crazy person I wonder if she'd bite me. She would hate it, that's for sure. No sudden slappy motions around her head, thanks.
 
#7 · (Edited)
I don't pat either because I heard it can confuse the horse. Both my boys LOVE scratchies though--especially around their eyes, ears and under the jaw. My paso even likes it when I use the manure fork to scratch his belly! My sister's qh will back his hind end up to you and expect you to scratch his dock and buttcheeks. Oh, and neck rubs--they love that, too.
 
#8 ·
I do all three at different times for different occasions, my pats are never hard tho'.
Standing with my horse I will stroke her neck while talking to her and sometimes give her a good scratch, she is good at letting me know where to scratch but often riding I will pat or rub her neck (Not hard) and praise her and she seems to know what I mean.

I had a young gelding that we were having a problem getting the right lead, left lead was fine but not the right. One day I asked for the right lead and got it right away. I was so pleased and patted him and praised him extravagantly, tried and got it again, more praise.
Then after some different schooling I asked for the good lead, the left and he stepped out on the right one. I had to laugh I guess he figured if the right one pleased me so much he would do it again. Does that mead pats and praise do the job??
 
#9 ·
I think it mostly depends on the body language and whatever else the horse reads. I believe a friendly slap on the butt as one walks by is a positive if the feeling is positive and the horse knows you. Horses will sometimes give one another friendly nudges.



That said, Temple Grandin says firm stroking brings memories of the mothers tongue licking. I've experimented with that on both horses and bovines and it seems to work in calming them somewhat. The woman who thinks like a cow should know!
 
#10 ·
Another good question OP. If you're doing it with the intention of rewarding the horse, or just being nice to him, IME horses don't generally like being patted/slapped, however gently - although my old mare used to enjoy being smacked hard on the rump, and I've met a cat that loved that too, and one of my dogs does too. So never say never! But a lot of horses IME don't really like being 'petted' or groomed either. So if you're intending it as a reward for the horse, you need to take notice of whether the horse actually likes whatever you're doing/giving.

Of course, patting or whatever else can become a meaningful *signal* when it's paired with a meaningful consequence, either 'good' or 'bad'.

And I do also pat my horses as part of their desensitisation training, because other people who meet them are inclined to do this and I don't want them reacting when they're smacked on the neck.
 
#13 ·
My horses like to be petted on the face but they are different from each other. All of them like me to run my hand over the top of their eyes and down their cheek. Laela likes for me to scratch under her jaw bones. I just maul Novia's face and she loves it but I've been doing that to her since she was a baby so she's used to it. Star is ok with me running my hand down her nose with the growth of the hair, she doesn't like rubs on her face.
I don't pat my horses either, they much prefer a pet on the neck or a scratch on the butt.

When I see competition riders smacking their horses on the neck with glee, it reminds me of football players smacking each other on the butt. It's weird to me but I accept it as something they do in their excitement of a good job. I bet the horse would appreciate some other gesture of a good job other than a smack on the neck.
 
#14 ·
I don't ever pat my horses I stroke them or scratch them. My mare loves a good scratch behind her ears, along with her chin, and along her rump. She also likes a nice stroke on her forehead and withers. Our gelding I have discovered likes a nice gentle stroke along his mane and withers and a soft stroke in s circular motion on his forehead he does not care for much more than that though. I have seen some people really manhandle there horses faces and they really don't like it but the person just does not pay attention. Many of the things we do with our horses are really more for our reward or pleasure than the horse. You really have to pay attention to your horse to see if they are just tolerating what you're doing as praise or if they really like it.
 
#15 ·
Reiterating what everyone has said, every horse (just like every person) is different. Dallas loves to have his face rubbed like you might take the hair off. Jasper doesn't like anyone going near his face, but he loves a good stroke-n-scratch on the neck. Nugget just about falls asleep getting groomed. Toby likes to have his face scratched after getting his bridle off, and loves a good butt scratch (like, right at the base of the tail). I do pat his neck when he does well, but also rub his neck or, usually toward the end of the session when stretching, lean over and scratch between his ears from the saddle.



I do think a soft pat is different than giving them a swat to the shoulder or butt, and they know it's different, or at least most of them do. I think a lot of the been-there-done-that-lesson/trail horses in particular are sort of aware that we're kind of strange and they meet us halfway.
 
#16 ·
My horse likes her eyes rubbed but not anywhere else on her head unless her sweaty bridle just came off and the bases of her ears need rubbing. She like her withers scritched and under her tail, and that's about it. She doesn't enjoy being slapped. If I do it, it's probably because I am cross with her.

I find those people (often top competitors) who whack their horses' necks after a successful jumping round or something to be a distasteful spectacle. Although probably the horse is so amped up they don't notice it that much.
 
#17 ·
I agree with @Avna.



"I find those people (often top competitors) who whack their horses' necks after a successful jumping round or something to be a distasteful spectacle. Although probably the horse is so amped up they don't notice it that much."


The horse that is consistently patted, even loudly, if it is associated with the completion of a task and the release of pressure, the cessation of work, or the gift of a treat learns that the 'pat' is a good thing because it accompanies other good things.


I pat my hrose sometimes, when grooming him, just to see the dust come up . "Ol' Pigpen" , I say. He may flinch a tiny bit, but I see it as part of the entire treatment of having him able to tolerate me doing just about ANYTHING to him while grooming him. He needs to be ok with me moving around him, slowly and sudden short movements. I'm not saying I'd whale on his face, but I want him to be ok with a friendly smack on his round butt, or me reaching under his belly with the fork to pick up poo, or dragging my jacket over his withers, . . . you name it. He must tolerate my holding his head for a bit, or leaning on him, or ruffling his mane. So, patting him affectionately might not be pleasurable to him, but if it's torture, then he needs work to learn that it's ok.
 
#18 ·
I like to give my horse either a rub, scratch, or a light pat to praise him. I’ve never done the over exaggerated big pats that too competitors do. I think he appreciates the scratches, rubs, and light pats, especially after a ride or during a grooming session.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
#23 ·
I rub or pat as it pleases me. At times I pat, at others I rub. The horses respond to both with a tail swish.
Hope I understood that sentence right - I put punctuation in places I thought it should be to make sense??

It's good that you realise what you're doing is to please YOU. So many people 'pat'(or otherwise) a horse as an attempted reward, without a thought as to whether the horse actually enjoys it. IME horses generally swish their tail at something that irritates them.
 
#20 ·
Depends on the situation. If I'm on the ground, always a pet/scratch/rub, usually on his neck, shoulders, or jaw. I know another horse who will lay his head on my shoulder and wait for me to reach my arm around him and pet the other side of his face.

If I'm riding and able to, I always reward with a release of pressure and a nice stroke on the neck. But if I'm cantering along, sometimes it's more of a gentle pat, because it's difficult to lean forward, stroke, and steer. :'D
 
#21 ·
I compete pretty high up in the UK and I have to agree. Often upon completing a particularly good round, I'll do the whole pat the neck, balled fist in the air to celebrate whilst saying 'yessss!.' I can admit this is due to feeling good about the round and celebrating, I do not feel this makes my horse understand she did good. I feel a good rub and a scratch after the initial celebration always goes down well for her and is a notion of a job well done. Pat = Human feeling good celebration. Pet = Praising the horse
 
#24 ·
I generally scratch, rather than rub or pat. Cherokee would lean heavily into a good scratch under his mane, and I knew some who liked their faces scratched lightly. In my experience, petting like a dog means very little to them, which makes sense to me considering how rough of things they tend to scratch on by their own choice (boards, metal, trees), and how they use their teeth to scratch themselves. But when I'm riding or grooming, I'll sometimes pat very lightly as a sort of "There we go" gesture, as it means to me, cant' speak for if they like it or even care.
 
#26 ·
Pat or rub, mine seem to have figured out it means I'm content / happy and therefore they are content / happy. If need be, they "translate" it: "We did good just now". They focus on what is being said, not how it is being said. My pats are pats, though, not full arm smacks. And I doubt my horses really crave rubs either. Except for when they have an itch.
 
#27 ·
I had it put to me like this once, and it is especially for when in the saddle:

Don't sweep your hand or hands forward in a big motion to slap/pat them on the neck, nor have your fingers crooked if intending to scratch them on the neck... That's how predators bring down prey animals, and while most domestic horses are steady enough to not react, you do have the rare few that are nervous by nature.

I have one of those, so when in the saddle, I lean forward casually while running my palm up his neck and give him a good Attaboy Scrub after we've seen a booger in bushes and he maintains, or regains quickly, his composure . He flicks those ears back, I can feel that tension melt out of him and I know he's 'come back to me' rather than stressing about what he thought he might have seen or heard.

On the ground, I look for the scratchy spots and reward generously.

I FINALLY FOUND Trigger's scratchy spot, after searching for almost four years! Found it this weekend... And maybe he's just finally relaxed enough to admit I found it... but it's right at his throat latch, then under his jaw where that gland is located... right in that area. He will just curl right up for that. That's the High Praise Reward all my horses get these days - a deep scrubbing on That Spot, whether it's a butt scratching, or that always itchy girth and belly area, or for AJ, weirdly, her flanks.

I DO catch myself sometimes patting him while I'm on the ground, like after we've gotten back from a ride, and yep. It's when I'm giving myself an Attaboy, but it's not rough or hard - because OW. I know I wouldn't like being slapped on the neck and shoulders by some other enthusiastic companion or acquaintance of mine. LOL :P Gotta work on not pat myself on the back for merely hanging on.
 
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#35 ·
I had it put to me likore this once, and it is especially for when in the saddle:

Don't sweep your hand or hands forward in a big motion to slap/pat them on the neck, n have your fingers crooked if intending to scratch them on the neck... That's how predators bring down prey animals, and while most domestic horses are steady enough to not react, you do have the rare few that are nervous by nature.

I have one of those, so when in the saddle, I lean forward casually while running my palm up his neck and give him a good Attaboy Scrub after we've seen a booger in bushes and he maintains, or regains quickly, his composure . He flicks those ears back, I can feel that tension melt out of him and I know he's 'come back to me' rather than stressing about what he thought he might have seen or heard.

On the ground, I look for the scratchy spots and reward generously.

I FINALLY FOUND Trigger's scratchy spot, after searching for almost four years! Found it this weekend... And maybe he's just finally relaxed enough to admit I found it... but it's right at his throat latch, then under his jaw where that gland is located... right in that area. He will just curl right up for that. That's the High Praise Reward all my horses get these days - a deep scrubbing on That Spot, whether it's a butt scratching, or that always itchy girth and belly area, or for AJ, weirdly, her flanks.

I DO catch myself sometimes patting him while I'm on the ground, like after we've gotten back from a ride, and yep. It's when I'm giving myself an Attaboy, but it's not rough or hard - because OW. I know I wouldn't like being slapped on the neck and shoulders by some other enthusiastic companion or acquaintance of mine. LOL :P Gotta work on not pat myself on the back for merely hanging on.





I often scratch my lease horse with my hands crooked, like a claw. You know why? because they take on the shape of a horse's front teeth, and that is what they use to scratch each other, and they do it HARD! So, having my fingers all in a line, crooked so I can apply real pressure, makes it so I can scratch them almost as well as another horse could , with his top, front teeth.
 
#31 ·
I admit I do both, I dont pat hard but I think I started doing it after working at the vet hospital, sometimes while the vet was working on a specific area or if the horse is a little needle shy we would pat different areas to draw their attention to what we are doing as opposed to what the vet was doing.
When I ride I feel like I start with a pat and go into a scratch or rub. 🤷‍♀️
 
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