REALLY Annoying Me, Just Want to Rant - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 12:08 PM
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I'm coming at this from a different direction...


So, if your trainer/instructor heard and did not set straight the "mom" comments...inform your trainer/instructor of what you are going to do since you want the record straight on facts.
Trainer/instructor will either step up and step in and go stop the rumor mill or you will.

Now get your anger and emotions under control.
You in a weeks time go and speak as a adult to them one-on-one and educate them on what your horse is...
A look and stated, "I clearly heard you speaking of us, about us and I wanted to set the record straight with facts."
"My horse is a solid riding partner. One who has never been aggressive nor does he have dangerous habits.
He lost sight in one eye..
Many one-eyed horses exist, are perfectly safe and succeed in riding endeavors of Olympic competitors, high-end show horse, therapy horse....to backyard family horse, trail riding horse and many other jobs done safely.
If they were "dangerous" to ride, to handle or be in a ring with others they would not be in such a position of trusted mount."

Enlighten and educate...and also ask/tell them in future if they have a question or comment about you or your horse to take it to you not spread unfounded rumors please.
You will gladly speak with them to alleviate their concerns and expand their knowledge when it comes to your horse or your own self and their knowledge lacking.
Expect mouths to hit the floor, great embarrassment or should be and stammering...

DO NOT bring up their horses or their children's abilities or lack of... Mothers are fiercely protective and nasty at times when told of their "beings" downfall!!
Now be the adult and walk away...

Expect some flack and if they keep their distance, so be it!
Just do make sure your trainer/instructor knows first and give them a chance to straighten the mess...if they don't or try to push this aside, the answer is no and then you will deal with it...
You are owed more than to be maligned or your horse for their lack of knowledge...negative talk is cheap.
Do so though as a adult would...maturity present, emotion and anger put away till later reach out to these people to educate them.
And no grudges held against....that is the tough part.
...
jmo...

The worst day is instantly better when shared with my horse.....
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post #12 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 12:29 PM
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As someone who rode several fully blind horses (on trails, no less, and not groomed trails), I understand your frustration! One of the ones I rode was a blind draft cross, and every time I mention that aspect of it, people get this drop-jawed look like "ARE YOU CRAZY??" Just ignore them, calmly go about your day knowing full well that you've got an amazing, fully capable horse under you. Even on this forum I've seen the disbelief at certain stories, from myself and other people. It's normal to be unsure about things you've never experienced, but no call for being rude the way these people clearly were. I'm glad you're proving them wrong!

I wouldn't confront them in any aggressive manner, nor bring up their horses' bad points as an argument, but I do understand the irritation and think you had a right to be irritated.

Don't judge someone's horse or skill because they don't compete or work with a trainer.

Sometimes they're the most in tune with each other.
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post #13 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 12:29 PM
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I think you handled it well. I tend to either ignore everything or I react in anger. It sounds as though you are in a position to do neither. I do agree with @horselovinguy that the behaviors need to be addressed, and I think he presented a great way to do so. You and your awesome gelding deserve to be able to be at the barn without the resident mean girls being snarky.

And that's awesome that your gelding is so solid and such a great partner for you. That partnership with a horse is an incredibly rewarding experience.

Rhonda
to ride on a horse, is to fly without wings
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post #14 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 12:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by A-Rider-Called-Carvide View Post
Oh, they're well aware. He can hear through the Alexa in the main barn. Which they were standing right next to! But I wouldn't wish his wrath on anyone! He doesn't stand for any big barn drama and cares about those horses like they are his children (All 50!) so I'm sure once he hears it, there's going to be some big fireworks. But I'm sure, if anything, I won't be in a group lesson with them anytime soon.

I wish my old lesson buddy would come back, but she's at boarding school a state over. Lessons with her are so much fun! I miss riding with her ansty saddlebred.

So he has Alexa posted all over the barns? I know Alexa listens, kind of like Roz. I know you can string her together like a baby monitor but to be actively listening to all that happens in a barn of what 32? 50? horses while trying to instruct?



  • Mike : Good morning, Roz, my succulent little garden snail. And who will we be scaring today?
    Roz : Wazowski! You didn't file your paperwork last night.
    Mike : Oh, that darn paperwork! Wouldn't it be easier if it all just blew away?
    Roz : Don't let it happen again.
    Mike : Yes, well, I'll try to be more careful next time.
    Roz : I'm watching you, Wazowski. Always watching. Always.
    Mike : Ooh, she's nuts.
or if she is broadcasting conversations from different points of the barn over an intercom?????? I'd suspect that if this were the case there would be complaints or people would just keep their mouths shut in the barn. Especially if they weren't first time visitors. Talk about invasion of privacy and Big Brother. Or does she record them and he goes listen later... I can't imagine being that OTT.


Either way. Walking away and being adult about it is the right response.
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post #15 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 06:05 PM Thread Starter
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If he ended up hearing from the Alexa, then I'm sure it was after, before he went to bed. Thank you all, he is an amazing horse. I feel better about it now, though. Confrontation isn't my thing, so thank you for the advice, but people in the Friesian show ring, are friends or they're not. I can brush it off. I'm just not going to listen to them; I listen to my trainer and my horse.

I wanna brag about him more, but I'll save that for a different post. This one is getting too long. Our focus is going to be on the show. Going for that blue!

And no, there's only an Alexa in the main barn near the tack room, because we also use it as a radio. It can be considered a little creepy, but, hey. They've been at this barn for more than a year and know where it is.

This whole horse girl phase wasn't supposed to last this long... oh well.
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post #16 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 06:36 PM
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I'm sorry you had to endure such comments and behavior from such ignorant people. Take the high ground, but I do really like @horselovinguy 's advice! Confronting them calmly may actually educate them, and if it doesn't work, at least you have the satisfaction of knowing that you stood your ground and defended your horse. But I wouldn't have any interest in cultivating a relationship with people like that.
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post #17 of 31 Old 10-19-2019, 09:05 PM
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Imagine all the famous people with one eye or vision problems, Peter Falk (Columbo), Sammy Davis Jr, Sandy Duncan. Even Bono has vision problems. Great people like great horses can have vision problems. Blind? Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder, Helen Keller...list goes on. Geniuses who made the world a better place.

Sent from my SM-S320VL using Tapatalk
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post #18 of 31 Old 10-20-2019, 08:29 AM
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Unless one of their names happens to be Alexa then probably not.



I don't think I'd want to have lessons or board someplace that the BO or trainer felt it necessary to review conversations held during the day when they were off. Too much time on their hands and talk about drama.



Ignore it. You do you. Your parents may want/need to spend a little more time at the barn if possible and that could deter the comments or they could do the educating for you.
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post #19 of 31 Old 10-20-2019, 12:24 PM
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"Barn moms"...sort of like dance moms, cheer moms...you get my drift.

Enjoy that good horse!!!!
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If you ever find yourself in a fair fight, it's because your tactics suck. ~ Marine 1SGT J. Reifinger
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post #20 of 31 Old 10-21-2019, 10:16 AM
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On social media, (Facebook, Instagram, or Youtube) look up "Endo the Blind". I'm sure there are other examples out there but he's probably the most popular and readily available on social media right now.

Both of his eyes had to be removed due to disease. His owner kept working with and training him... he goes to clinics and shows and trail rides, with his owner and with a younger rider that I think maybe the owner's daughter (not sure on that, I don't follow too closely.) They do everything with him and he is completely blind, both eyes gone, with empty sockets.
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"I am the one thing in life I can control. I am inimitable I am an original. Iím not falling behind or running late. Iím not standing still I am lying in wait." - Wait For It
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