Hoofbeats Towards Happiness - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 63 Old 02-26-2018, 09:00 PM
Yearling
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 1,219
• Horses: 1
No it's completely understandable! My good friend of 12 years - who dislikes horses funnily enough - has Aspergers. But hes on the "worse end" if you can put it like that without it being considered rude. He finds going shopping or a mcdonalds drive-through terrifying and even when my mother asks him a question sometimes he gapes like a goldfish and just walks out the room. But if you get him one on one he's a normal person y'know. He just can't deal with too much stimulus and prefers using things like typing on skype. When I ride, which I refuse to give up, he sits in the car and waits for me bless him. A real internet gamer who lives through his keyboard. When he does speak he has zero censorship eek! But I know he has no hidden agenda and is also real. I say I understand, it's less that I understand your experience but more that I'm accepting of it. You'll find many accepting people here and I'm so sure that when you get a horse you'll find true, honest and non-judgemental friendship too! The best kind! My instructor will happily shout at me by the way but is very soft with my friend. You might just find she was matching her demeanour for the level of critique that particular rider prefers?

I think you absolutely should window shop. xD And if you're open to it you should share what takes your fancy. I'd definitely be interested. I love window shopping for horses and am learning more about what to look out for in ads. I wouldn't worry about meeting a seller or any of that. You just need a single person in a professional horse position that understands you. If you come to trust them they might even end up being better able to match you a horse. I'm sure they are out there. What about just going somewhere to groom a horse? I know for a fact the places I ride the staff would be VERY accommodating towards your disposition, even going out of their way to make you comfortable, even if it literally means getting out of your way!

Who knows, maybe someone here one day can hook you up? It's definitely not a stupid idea to window shop though! Your husband sounds amazing. It's 2am so I'm going to go crash but it was lovely meeting you and I look forward to seeing you around :)


EDIT: just saw your photos. I am. So. Jealous. I live in central London. It is killing me. So beautiful. I can only imagine the hacking available.
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post #12 of 63 Old 02-26-2018, 09:52 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Idaho
Posts: 338
• Horses: 1
Hello!! I wanted to add my welcome on here as well. I must say, reading your first post gave me goosebumps. How you explained your relationship with the OTTB- the warm breath, the nickers...I could almost smell all the horsey smells with you. Call me a romantic haha.

My heart goes out to you on your daily struggles. I too look forward to hearing your story! There's nothing that can fully replace physical lessons, but there are lots of learning to be done through other means. I personally love researching different training methods, different theories, different stories, etc. There are many horse trainers out there who write blogs about understanding the horse's mind, different training tools/methods, explain fundamentals of riding, and more! One of my personal favorites is The Willing Equine. There are also many videos of riding lessons that people have posted; some are painful to watch but you can even learn from the bad ones! It gives you a visual of what it looks like to do things correctly and incorrectly. That is one of the blessings of the internet- there are so many connections that can be made, like right here on this forum!

I'm glad you created an account to join us on here!!

"Do you give the horse its strength or clothe its neck with a flowing mane?" ~Job 39:19
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post #13 of 63 Old 02-27-2018, 01:42 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 80
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@RedDunPaint Thank you, I will definitely look into those blogs!

@Kalraii I honestly have no idea what kind of trails are around here! Mostly I just walk the dirt road around the property. I do know that we are only about 10 miles or so from the state park national trail system though.

So I woke up this morning to what seemed like a dream. The pastures were all misty, so much so that even 20 feet from my porch I could barely make out the horses shapes! But oh could I hear them! Prancing and cantering and neighing for their breakfast. I felt like I should have been transport back to the land of Tir Na Nog, lol. It has since changed into just some grey drizzly gloom. Yuck!

I seem to be having a difficult time today hallucinating. It's a normal thing for me as a side effect from a medication I'm on. The problem is, it makes me see bugs. Everywhere. I didn't know I was hallucinating at first, so I smacked a bug off of my dog! He turned and gave me this look like "what the hell Mom?!" I guess I'll let him take care of his own bugs from now on.

I know I need to work my way into finding a trainer. Eventually. Lessons. Ok yeah eventually. For the time being though I cannot seem to stop myself from window shopping!! I know how to feed a horse, brush a horse, wrap legs, blanket etc, basic care I understand. I'm not even sure I'm all that keen to BE a rider if it takes soooooo much people interaction to be honest. I just would love to be able to have the ability to be around another horse. Ownership is a ways off, but I think I keep trying to convince myself to make it happen sooner.

So lets see, what is it I'm looking for. I'm rather short, about 5'4 so I would like to find something around 15 hands. I'm on the fence with gelding or mare, so kinda keeping that option open. I want a horse with really good feet, like dinner plate and solid iron haha! Other than that, solid solid temperament. A horse that likes people or would get used to having a person be around. An in your pocket type, but without being disrespectful. As far as breed, I'm not very picky! I'd choose temperament over breed any day.

I'm not really sure if there is anything else I should be looking into??
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finding happy
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post #14 of 63 Old 02-27-2018, 05:41 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 80
• Horses: 0
What we are doing today, and why we are not outside! ��

[IMG] https://ibb.co/b3UiOH
https://ibb.co/e26Kxc [/IMG]
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finding happy
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post #15 of 63 Old 02-27-2018, 06:09 PM
Yearling
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 1,219
• Horses: 1
@findinghappy I think you might have more luck uploading pictures from your album. If you click advanced under the text box and click the paperclip icon (to attach) and follow those instructions. Hope it works as I'm just getting my head around it as well.

Feel free to link any horses you come across that tickle you xD I'm sure your house puffs dont mind. It's great that you're short - I'd love to go back and ride ponies but alas. Have a good afternoon/evening!

Last edited by Kalraii; 02-27-2018 at 06:17 PM.
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post #16 of 63 Old 02-27-2018, 07:03 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 80
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Thank you for that suggestion, that does not seem to be working either. How does everyone else upload photos???

finding happy
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post #17 of 63 Old 02-27-2018, 07:11 PM
Yearling
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: London, UK
Posts: 1,219
• Horses: 1
I saved your file to my computer desktop. Then came back to the advanced textbox, clicked paperclip > manage attachments > under "choose file from your computer" select it > click upload on the right. It seems to work that way for me right now at least. I think links are a bit more awkward?

edit: woops, misclick on one of the pictures!
Attached Images
File Type: jpg doggy puffs.jpg (70.2 KB, 2 views)

Last edited by Kalraii; 02-27-2018 at 07:17 PM.
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post #18 of 63 Old 02-27-2018, 08:08 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 80
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It could be that that is the issue then, I'm only using my phone, as I do not have the internet at my house for using a computer. I may have to remedy that in the future then, even just to post photos haha! Thank you again for the help, you're wonderful!
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finding happy
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post #19 of 63 Old 02-28-2018, 03:38 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 80
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This morning there are quite a few thuds going on in front of my house! Instead of waking up to horses wanting their breakfast, it is some kind of hole digger. On the other side of the covered arena it looks like they are adding some rather large wooded posts. More pastures?? Although all of the other pastures on the property are made of a pipe fencing, so this is making me feel rather curious!! I'm sneaking peeks out my front window as I'm sipping my morning tea.

I was doing some googling last night and came across a place not too far from here that offers lessons for a fair price in both English and Western. After talking with DH after he got home late from work we were wondering what kind of questions we should be asking a place like this? Given my situation is difficult, would it be out of the question to ask if they would come to us to give lessons, as there are arenas here? Anything I should be aware of?? It says on their website they have a competition team. Lol, yeah probably never for me in this lifetime, but that's a good thing in a school, right?? It is called Jakk Farms in Huntsville, Texas if anyone has heard of them.

I hope everyone is having a fantastic day!! Nice and sunny today, would be a fantastic day to go ride!

finding happy
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post #20 of 63 Old 02-28-2018, 06:28 PM
Green Broke
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Huntsville, AL
Posts: 4,222
• Horses: 3
Hi, findinghappy, and welcome. I love your nickname, btw, especially given your history.

I know firsthand - well, second hand, I guess - about dealing with anxiety and depression. My son has been disabled with kidney disease for most of his short 32 year life. For the last 11 years, he's been on dialysis after having and losing two kidney transplants. Gifts given and lost. As hard as it is for me to watch, I know it is harder for him to live. And yet, every other day he gets up at 3 a.m. and gets ready, then drives to dialysis which terrifies him (he's afraid he's going to die while on the machine). He has very few friends and is pretty much a recluse - not because he's bad with people, but because he doesn't have the energy to be social.

My granddaughter also lives with me. She battles depression on a daily basis. In fact, we're finally having her tested for bi-polar disorder. Her anxiety isn't about being around people - she loves crowds and activity - but she's painfully shy. A watcher. She gets anxious about things that haven't happened, that most likely won't happen. She works herself up into believing she's afraid of things - even things she wasn't afraid of yesterday. And to her, these are real fears. She also suffers from night-terrors.

We have 3 dogs and 2 horses. And we live in the Wrong Huntsville, or I'd be volunteering to be your horse-friend. I've had horses most of my life and while I've never had "formal lessons," I suspect I have enough horse-sense to compensate. I've also seen how horses can open the world for someone like you. I hope you find someone who knows how to show and step back, often without words to let you try. Or to explain the why of something without eye contact or expecting an acknowledgement. I know how difficult those small things can be.

Now - what you should be looking for - stick to geldings, they're much more apt to be pocket horses. Yes, there are mares out there that are pocket pets, too, but by far the larger percentage are geldings. They're also less likely to have mood swings. At your height and ability, I think I'd be looking a little shorter than 15h. Set your low bar at 14h with your high at 15h - there are some nice horses out there in that range.

Have your husband introduce himself to your barn neighbors on your behalf. Have him ask about stalls, pasturage and boarding at the barn near you. Ask if the arena is off-limits/closed at certain hours and if they might make an exception. Who knows, there might even be a trainer or boarder there who would be willing to help you, or an absentee (busy) owner who would love for someone to give their horse a little attention. Go as slow as you need, and as fast as you are comfortable with.

Oh and ... while I might not be fighting the battles you fight, I too find peace in the breath of a horse.

Courage is taking just one more step...
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