Well, you know, @Hondo
, the males of the species reading could always swap out the genders to fit their situation. Which reminds me, has anyone seen @bsms
? He has many saddles and could use this line of argument...
This whole thing reminds me...Here's a little gem I couldn't find on the Internet and actually had to copy out of an old school book. Perhaps we could modify the metaphor to include saddles... How To Select A Husband
by Robbie Poor
When selecting a husband, you should consider several important points. First, keep in mind that you must take the same care in selecting a husband that you would in selecting an automobile. Certainly you will want the one that will give you the best mileage. A large man, like a large car, will be more expensive to keep up, and the amount of fuel the larger model burns will make a difference to your budget. On the other hand, a large model wears well and is more comfortable than a smaller model - and it is certainly the best for long hauls. You must remember, however, that when the larger model ages, there is more to show: the interior is shot, the cushions sag and bulge, and the top is often shiny.
If you are petite, it is all right to look at the smaller models. If you are not petite, get a good view of the two of you together before you make a final decision: you may look like an Amazon steering a toy around. The myth that you can park any easier with a small one than a large one is just that - a myth.
The next, and perhaps most crucial, point to consider when selecting a husband is temperament and personality. Here again, as with a car, looks may be deceiving and hide what is underneath. It little matters what the model looks like, for it is how it behaves that counts. If it is a slow starter or if it snarls and growls when the going gets rough, then you need to keep shopping. Assuredly, the model should be dependable and reliable, for there are rough streets as well as paved roads to drive. Sometimes even an older model is the best buy, if picked with caution. But always be wary of a model with retreads: they tend to break down as the speed is increased. And look closely for paint used to cover up damaged areas. These give way under stress.
Another thing to look for as you make your selection is a model that is easy to handle, one that responds well to your lightest touch. You certainly do not want to spend your time with one that wears you out as you steer it. Select one that you can manoeuvre with ease.
Take extreme caution when breaking in your model. Use a light touch. Take it in for frequent tune-ups. Above all, use the right fuel.