Does this sound correct in terms of horse ownership? - Page 4 - The Horse Forum
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post #31 of 35 Old 01-15-2015, 09:09 AM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Newport, PA
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Oh, Honey...I am sorry. Parents don't always understand. I am especially appalled that they'd suggest terminating current lessons as punishment for being driven. I wish they could talk to my mom, who'd tell them she'd give anything to go back to my teen years and do it over again, supporting the horse habit. I might not have succeeded as a professional rider, but I'd certainly not been as likely to make some of the choices I DID make.

Keep your head down, keep on with lessons, and when you are older, out of the house, and with a job of your own, you can take as many lessons as you can afford. You can lease a horse, if you can afford it. One day, you will own a horse. But don't give up.
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post #32 of 35 Old 01-15-2015, 11:05 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Vermont
Posts: 6,402
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Sorry the conversation didn't go well. We obviously don't know your parents, but I'm sure they had their reasons. I hope you will still have opportunities for riding in the short term.

While this is probably small consolation, just remember that it's very easy to get back involved with horses as an adult. Sure, you likely won't be able to compete at a high level if you start serious riding and ownership in your 30s or beyond, but you most definitely can have a very rich, fulfilling horse experience as an adult- when you call all the shots. Personally speaking, I took very infrequent lessons as a young teen, and then was basically out of horses until my late 20s. I didn't own my first horse until my early 30s.
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post #33 of 35 Old 01-16-2015, 09:16 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
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I have been banned from my lessons after mentioning showing to my parents (which I would have paid for and been responsible for completely).
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post #34 of 35 Old 01-16-2015, 10:03 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Alberta
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Quote:
Originally Posted by turkishdelight View Post
I have been banned from my lessons after mentioning showing to my parents (which I would have paid for and been responsible for completely).
Dislike this a million times over.

I'm really sorry it turned out this way. I was one of those girls who always dreamed of owning a horse, and my mom could not support it financially... But she always said it was the life she wanted for me. Even though she couldn't physically make it become a reality, she would have supported me if it was possible. She never once told me to "give up, it's not going to happen."

It doesn't sounds like your parents are very supporting at all. Your previous mentioning of how your mom isn't into the horses at all fuels my anger, since it seems like she is using this as an opportunity to cut horses out of your life, and more importantly hers, as well.

Really, really frustrating.

OP, don't give up. I understand the disappointment, but show your parents how mature you are by continuing to act maturely about it. Maybe they will come around.
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post #35 of 35 Old 01-16-2015, 11:18 PM
Foal
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 50
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I feel your pain

Quote:
Originally Posted by turkishdelight View Post
I have been banned from my lessons after mentioning showing to my parents (which I would have paid for and been responsible for completely).
I was desperate for a horse as a teen (as were many of us here!). My parents weren't interested in horses and could not afford to buy one. I remember working out costings etc the way you did. The reality is, though, that horses cost a lot of money, and the person earning that money needs to see the value of spending it. Also, even though you're more than willing to be responsible for yourself and your riding, the reality is that it will still impact on the whole family.

Do I recall correctly that you once said you hope to study medicine? If this is the case, and you're going into year 11, the reality is that you've got a whole lot of study ahead of you. This can be hard to manage as well as a horse of your own. I know how much it hurts, but try your hardest to focus on you study, and work towards getting a well paid job so that you can buy a horse for yourself when you're all grown up.

I'm 33 now and with a daughter of my own. She's learning to ride, and although I rarely ride myself these days, I plan to buy her a horse sometime this year when she's ready. It will mean sacrifices in other parts of our lives, but those are sacrifices I'm happy to make because I see value in having horses in our lives. People that aren't horsey can't see that. Does that make sense?

Reading your posts make me feel like it was just yesterday that my heart ached for a horse as a teen. Imagine my joy and happiness in being able to give my daughter what I longed for so desperately growing up! One day, you will do the same!

Focus on your studies, finish school, get a good education so you can get a great job. Read and try to learn more about horses in other ways. I know it's easier said than done.

Ask Mum and Dad what you can do to get your lessons back. Tell them you've accepted you can't have a horse for now, but you'd really love to continue riding. Promise them you won't ask them to buy one again.

I know it's hard to accept, and it really hurts, but horses will still be there when you're grown up. You'll have your own one day, and if you ever have a daughter, your joy in letting her have horses in her life will be the greatest feeling ever. Trust me!
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