Feeling Overwhelmed - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 02:20 PM Thread Starter
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Feeling Overwhelmed

As a new and beginner (1st time) horse owner, I am feeling very overwhelmed. I have one horse (4 yr old mare) and an adopted shetland pony (20 years). I posted on this forum just recently about a problem I was having with the feeding process. I got a lot of great advice, and I thank everyone for their help. I can't seem to shake these feelings of apprehension and doubt that I'm having. Are these normal feelings? I feel like I should keep just one of them, but I know that wouldn't be fair to the one that's left. I just wanted a companion horse, had no intention to ride right away. I don't think the 4 yr old mare was a good choice. But the seller insisted that she would be well suited for just a companion if I didn't want to ride. She is a great horse and would make a wonderful trail horse for someone. But I don't think she is a good fit for me, I felt this right away. I just wanted an older mature, well trained sweet horse that I could take care of and love. I have had them both for about 2 and a half months. The shetland came to me with a problem eye also that required veterinary care. He can be pushy and nippy but I spent more time with him in the beginning due to the eye injury. Anyway, sorry to ramble on so. I don't mind all the work that comes with owning them. Just need some advice or thoughts.
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post #2 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 02:55 PM
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Sounds to me like the seller saw you coming. Unless there are soundness issues, I don't understand selling a horse that young as just a companion horse. I'm still not clear whether you mean companion for the pony or for yourself. I'd say sell the mare. Then, before you put money and emotion into another, decide what exactly you want out of the deal. If you want to ride, get a horse and RIDE it. The more you dally around, the more problems you'll have with a horse that's den hanging around in the pasture, not doing any work. If you simply want a horse to take care of and love, I'd suggest another old pony. It sounds as if you would provide a good home for an old pony that has served its' time with a bunch of kids and deserves a nice place to spend the rest of its' days.
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post #3 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 03:00 PM
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^^ Couldn't put it any better than that!
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post #4 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 03:11 PM Thread Starter
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Cordillera Cowboy, thanks for the advice. The companion would be for the 20 yr old shetland, and of course for me. I was thinking that the pony might like another older pony for a companion instead of the young mare. And I'm pretty much decided that I will not ride. I don't want to upset the seller I bought her from, but I've had this gut feeling for about 2 months now. I have mentioned my feelings to her. The seller has a right of first refusal on the bill of sale contract. Should I have her look for an older pony for me or find someone else?
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post #5 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 03:16 PM Thread Starter
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Yes I agree with you DraftyAiresMum! Cordillera Cowboy put it exactly as I have felt. If I can sell her back, should I wait awhile to spend time bonding with the pony I have or get another one right away.
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post #6 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 03:25 PM
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I would find someone else to help you find a companion for the pony. The person who sold you the mare seems to only be out to have your money. Maybe even put out an ad on Craigslist or wherever saying that you'd like to provide a loving home to a companion to your older pony.
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post #7 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 03:31 PM
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It sucks following your gut sometimes, especially when other people and even animals are involved.

You will feel a worlds amount better when you find a good home for the mare and have a better suited pony for your new buddy :)

To ride a horse is to ride the sky.
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post #8 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 07:32 PM
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If you're not wanting to ride, what's the prob with the 4yo mare? - I agree a green horse is not the best for a beginner rider, but as a paddock ornament, don't know what the issues are? While the seller may well have 'seen you coming', that she sold you this horse as a companion, for maybe riding, later down the track, does not equal bad IMO. Perhaps the mare is well trained for her age & they presumed you'd be working with a trainer when it comes to riding.

Sounds like perhaps what you need most is some experienced support around you? Do you have any horsey friends or locals who might give some first hand lessons or advice?
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post #9 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 09:28 PM
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Its natural to feel a bit apprehensive at first. Don't worry about doing something wrong. We all make mistakes (have and will) and the best way is to just learn from those mistakes. A new horse is always a bit tricky at first, and you will wonder if you've bought the right one or not. The best advice I can give you is to give your horse time for the two of you to get used to each other, and spend a lot of time with your new horse. The best way to get to know a new horse is to do groundwork with it.
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post #10 of 22 Old 10-19-2014, 10:08 PM
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People like you, who just want to care for and love on a nice quiet horse are very special, and there are horses out there who will be so very lucky to be found by you. there are lots of older horses that people want to get rid of, (or just want to retire to a good home) and these horses have good training on them, good manners, and are generall calm and a pleasure to be around. I'd sell the mare and look to give a nice oldster a loving , companionable home.
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