I don't like my trainer but I the barn is the only decent option for my mare - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 20 Old 07-09-2016, 08:17 PM
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I didn't take the time to read ALL of the replies so forgive me if I'm repeating anyone else.

I would say ABSOLUTELY move your mare, it may be an inconvenience, but at this point with the training methods they're using your safety is potentially at risk.

Your mare clearly isn't the type to sit down and kumbaya with when it comes to training, she seems to need stern correction from time to time and if that means you're going to get a talking to after the fact then I strongly believe that you're wasting your money.

Is it an option to completely stop all lessons? If so, I would stop them and ride on your own during the work week and then bring her to your old barn for lessons when time permits.
Hopefully all works out for you!
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post #12 of 20 Old 07-09-2016, 08:37 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by DomiStLaurent View Post
I didn't take the time to read ALL of the replies so forgive me if I'm repeating anyone else.

I would say ABSOLUTELY move your mare, it may be an inconvenience, but at this point with the training methods they're using your safety is potentially at risk.

Your mare clearly isn't the type to sit down and kumbaya with when it comes to training, she seems to need stern correction from time to time and if that means you're going to get a talking to after the fact then I strongly believe that you're wasting your money.

Is it an option to completely stop all lessons? If so, I would stop them and ride on your own during the work week and then bring her to your old barn for lessons when time permits.
Hopefully all works out for you!
You know, I might be able to get away with it if I start riding before work. That way I don't have to flat out tell them I don't want their lessons AND they won't be around to take offense with my riding. I'm a bit apprehensive about my skills in schooling this horse on my own but I suppose I can try. It'll most probably be better than the Ghandi approach even if I only do it at walk and trott. I'm still not fully comfortable with cantering on her, unfortunately. I can do, I'm just not sure that I'm not teaching her wrong. Thank you.
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post #13 of 20 Old 07-09-2016, 10:43 PM
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If helps, you could always video your rides and post them for feed back. Then you won't be schooling her alone, per say.
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post #14 of 20 Old 07-09-2016, 11:33 PM
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I'd start packing my bags and looking for another place!

Even if you try to bite your tongue now, if your anything like me, your bound to say something eventually. When you do say something and they try to kick you out you're going to be scrambling for a place to go! You don't want to get stuck in that position.
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post #15 of 20 Old 07-10-2016, 02:06 AM Thread Starter
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I'd start packing my bags and looking for another place!

Even if you try to bite your tongue now, if your anything like me, your bound to say something eventually. When you do say something and they try to kick you out you're going to be scrambling for a place to go! You don't want to get stuck in that position.
Thankfully, that wouldn't be a problem. I have my own land and small stables so I could bring her over on a moments notice in a pinch. Also, my old barn is actually a big collection of barns around a racecourse with at least 300 boxes available, with a lot of options. And I've got a firm handle on my mouth, I've been working in a customer-facing position all my life - this isn't the most difficult bunch of people I had to deal with by far :)
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post #16 of 20 Old 07-10-2016, 02:07 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by ApuetsoT View Post
If helps, you could always video your rides and post them for feed back. Then you won't be schooling her alone, per say.
Thank you, I'll remember that.
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post #17 of 20 Old 07-10-2016, 07:49 AM
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One way to deal with a bad boarding situation (for the short term) is to figure out everyone's schedule and avoid going there when the worst of the worst show up. People are creatures of habit and have work schedules so it's not that hard to do. Drop the lessons and trainer at this barn-it's good that you recognize that this kind of "training" does no one any good, not the human and definitely not the horse! Take lessons if you can at the other barn, even if it's on a school horse then bring back what you've learned to use on your own. Explain to your instructor what you are having trouble with and ask for "homework".


You may have to remind these people that the horse belongs to you, and you are the only one who makes the decisions .
You know I seriously, desperately searched for two solid years to find a new place to move my horses. In the end, I found my new, wonderful barn by word of mouth from my horsy network. I kept asking everyone I knew if they knew of any boarding barns. Eventually an acquaintance mentioned a place in passing, (a place that is not advertised publicly). I got the details, visited the place and moved my horses out two days later. Some of the best are not even advertised as they want to keep everything low key and hate barn drama.


This fluffy, dreamy attitude at this stable is going to drive you crazy especially if they are interfering in the handling of your own horse. Frankly, barring neglect or abuse, it's none of their business! Start looking for another place.
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post #18 of 20 Old 07-13-2016, 10:43 AM
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I would not be a fan of doing it "their" way during the week and changing to your proper method other times. Not consistent and probably not going to do any good with your mare.
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post #19 of 20 Old 07-15-2016, 12:22 PM
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As someone that did a lot of barn hopping until I found what I consider to be the perfect barn... move. Having a bad barn is like having a bad roommate—putting up with it is just not worth the stress. Even though it will take some initial effort to move, it will be worth it in the long run. Put out some feelers for unadvertised barns (check Craigslist and Facebook and other weird places, too) and maybe scout out the training program at a couple of options via a lesson or two. The lack of turn out time sucks, but with consistent work your horse should be alright and she'll be way better off without conflicting training methods.
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post #20 of 20 Old 07-15-2016, 12:36 PM
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Originally Posted by Horsef View Post
Oh, and the BOs horse who is a fire breathing dragon nobody can handle but she loves him.

Doesn't that just figure?????? And how would one assume her horse got to be that way? Could it be lack of discipline and direction? Sheesh.


Good luck to you, and wishing you and your horse many happy miles...or trips around the arena.

If you ever find yourself in a fair fight, it's because your tactics suck. ~ Marine 1SGT J. Reifinger
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