New Horse Owner Looking for Advice - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 15 Old 05-24-2016, 06:01 PM
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Western Massachusetts
Posts: 6,374
• Horses: 3
I think falling in love is something people, not horses, do. What horses do is begin to notice you're someone special, trust you, respond to you. Yes, some very much do become attached, but it takes time. I've had my horse since last fall, but it is only now, in May, that I am seeing and feeling real signs that we are making a bond. She knows her name -- at least when I say it -- she is beginning to come to me instead of just stand there in the pasture (I don't food-reward normally), she nickers when she sees me even when I'm not bringing breakfast or anything at all. She distinguishes me from all the other people she meets.

Our riding connection is getting stronger, we trust each other a lot more in iffy situations (trail riding alone is pretty much one long iffy situation on a sensitive green horse like mine). It's taken a while, but I feel the longer we're together the deeper we will understand each other and the more we'll rely on each other.
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post #12 of 15 Old 05-24-2016, 06:21 PM
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 1,635
• Horses: 0
I'm In the same boat as you. I bought my first horse four weeks ago and, being an anxious novice, I was a wreck. She did have some issues crop up after the move that she didn't have when I tried her. I rode her every single day for the past month under instruction of my trainer and I took her for long in-hand walks. Most of the lessons consisted of me on a lunge line, mostly walking in circles and some nervous trotting. My trainer rode her a bit in every lesson as well.

A couple of days ago, I had a very bad lesson, I felt nauseous and I had to get off 10 minutes into it, that's how scared I was - even though the initial issues have been solved and she didn't do anything wrong in a while. Then, suddenly, the very next day my anxiety disappeared. I have no idea what happened, but I took two lessons, all trotting and a tiny canter, without the lunge line AND I went on walk, riding this time, on a trail on my own. I have to say, seeing a 10 year old girl whom my trainer had ride her without problems also helped.

I have to say that there seems to be some sort of a bond forming. She looks to me when unsure, walks up to me as soon as she sees me in pasture so that I can save her from the meany gelding (he doesn't do much, just glares)... She also recognizes my trainer and she will gravitate to her in school if I'm not giving direction. It's quite funny, today I put her between the door and my trainer to check which has the stronger pull, she bobbed her head up and down because she couldn't make up her mind.

Best of luck
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post #13 of 15 Old 05-24-2016, 08:11 PM
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 48,098
• Horses: 2
that';s a beautiful mare. you will be unable to not fall in love with her.

"resistance is futile"
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post #14 of 15 Old 05-25-2016, 05:07 AM
Green Broke
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: New South Wales, Australia
Posts: 4,863
• Horses: 1
I remember at pony club they used to say it took about a year for horse and rider to really develop that connection.

Give it time.

I bought my current horse on logic. Ticked all my boxes. I didn't fall in love with him and I have had him for three years now. There has never been that real intense bond and love between us, I've had it with other horses but to be honest, all things considered, this horse has worked out way better than those ones I completely adored.

Between me and my horse it's like we are old friends, he comes when I call and will follow me anywhere, but it's a relaxed connection. I don't put human feelings onto him and he seems to respect me as a person. It sounds weird now that I am writing it, but it works.
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post #15 of 15 Old 05-25-2016, 06:31 AM
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 2,246
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She's beautiful! I didn't love our horse when we bought him. Our trainer strongly recommended him, and I trust her so much that I bought him anyway. Now, I completely adore that horse and smooch on him every chance I get. The confidence is coming along. Every day that I have a successful ride on him and he doesn't try to kill me I feel better about him (he hasn't ever tried anything; I'm just paranoid). I think it takes awhile to form a complete bond.
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