Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Central Hill Country Texas
I might suggest to you that you look into learning to ride western style. Not that riding western properly doesn't have its own set of challenges however, it does generally have a feeling of being more relaxed.
The saddle feels more secure and in an emergency there is the horn to grab which might make you feel more confident.
There is a proper way to manage the reins and you will still need to learn to do a direct rein (vs. neck reining) at some point, but again, the reins are much more loosely held and so little mistakes don't feel so substantial.
Thirdly, there is no need to post a trot, you get to sit, which can be difficult at first but, once you learn it, you pretty much have it down.
Fourth, most western trained horses are quarter horses and while there are exceptions to this, they are generally more calm and compliant than some of the other hotter breeds normally found in English riding.
IMO all of these things would go a long way to contributing to building your confidence in your ability to ride. Its never any fun when you feel like you can't do anything right. At some point down the road, perhaps you will want to explore English again and be able to go into it with more of a can-do feeling.
“You spend your whole life with horses and just about the time you think you have them figured out, a horse comes along that tells you otherwise.” –quote from my very wizened trainer